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qwerty67890 New Zealand. Oct 19 2007 10:25. Posts 14026

so im like

at this gay club with a frind who is actually a gay.

this guy i=never stops talking to me in the toilet line

"im waiting for a cubicle"
"lets share" he says
"urrr..... nah, im good on my own"
"oh come on dont be shy"
"nah seriously...im good"

some time later after dancing and my friend almost getting beaten up for dancing with some chick im outside smoking and he comes out

"hey you want a smoke?"
"nah im all good"

i spot some hot chick in a really short skirt

"man, what about her>?!?!"
"you like women?"
"well... yeh dude"

then he offers me to smoke some weed so im like "HELLS YEH"

hes like "OK COme down here

we end up down all these allies and im sketching out

he starts rubbing my balls nd peen

"urr... dude be easy" i say
"if i was easy id be sucking you off right now..."
"control son control youself"
"i bet youve got a massive cock"
"well yeh obv i have"

then these french come round the corner

they ask us a question but i dnno what he saying so im like

"yo wanna light?"

he agrees

our faggt man agrees to light

"ill be back in 2 mintes just gotta.... go round here" i say

i leg ff round the cornder and dont stp nning till i hit the clb and im fully fucked off my face.

i lock myself n a toilet and tell my mate im gonna get a taix home but hes like "nah dont worry we will go together in 10 minutes"

we hold out till the nthen go to a shop thats still open a nd get a pie and shit

i still feel

violated

he fully undid my fly

and tried to rub my penis

and claimed i had a "semi"

which was a lie coz i was like "nah dude youre just making shit up" i dont have a semi nor am i turned on by you rubbing my package but ill let you for the time being

he was a teacher or some shit

so

fucking hell

LOL

he tried to go down on me but i denied it. Id probably have allowed him had i been able to get a stiffy to a lok.

he whole situatoion was lol

HahA

im so gay

1 votes

qwerty67890 New Zealand. Oct 19 2007 10:32. Posts 14026

this is the closest ive ever been to being raped LOL

Karma

Australia. Oct 19 2007 10:34. Posts 3538

hahahahahhahahahhahahaha

FAG!

fish mentality

DustySwedeDude Sweden. Oct 19 2007 10:34. Posts 8623

You could've just closed your eyes.

qwerty67890 New Zealand. Oct 19 2007 10:38. Posts 14026

he was actually down on his knees (no joke)

and i was like "well i don wannt disappoint him"

but my penis was so flacid from being manhandled

i just couldnt go anything more than this. I danced at the ckub wth ny mate and some guy he had mt but it was still kind of wierd and i was so fucked offf my face.

kantoiki Australia. Oct 19 2007 10:40. Posts 3818

OH

MY

AHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAAHHAHAH HILARIOUS lOl

Someone give this man a medal

muckv - i have an iq of 180 and i want someone to teach me how to take a shit IN the toilet.

lucifer Sweden. Oct 19 2007 10:42. Posts 5955

you would allowed him if the equipment worked properly?

dude.

On February 19 2009 22:21 Confedrate wrote: i dont get it

Muhweli Finland. Oct 19 2007 10:44. Posts 10663

Floofy says: my dick is easily bigger than 90% of guys i checked it on the net | Floofy says: i im also doing movements

qwerty67890 New Zealand. Oct 19 2007 10:44. Posts 14026

WHUT THE FUCK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO>

i was expecting weed and were down some hidden alley and im like ".........................im getting raped here"

he kept going for the tackle there was no eay way out i was hoping i could just score the bag of weed and bail off

sacrafice

its how i do

iD.iNsky United States. Oct 19 2007 10:45. Posts 910

wow man that seems pritty gay, but w/e floats ur boat

lucifer Sweden. Oct 19 2007 10:49. Posts 5955

what you're supposed to do?

stereotypically. homosexuals are not strong.

gaybash!

edit: all this is very lighthearted. i love everyone.

On February 19 2009 22:21 Confedrate wrote: i dont get it

Last edit: 19/10/2007 10:50

kantoiki Australia. Oct 19 2007 10:57. Posts 3818

You're supposed to beat the crap out of him or at least claim you will unless he stops sexually molesting you.

muckv - i have an iq of 180 and i want someone to teach me how to take a shit IN the toilet.

gawdawaful Canada. Oct 19 2007 10:58. Posts 9012

On October 19 2007 09:25 byrnesam wrote:

he was a Catholic Priest

Im only good at poker when I run good

Op3th United States. Oct 19 2007 10:58. Posts 565

Thats when you punch him in the fucking neck, the second he go's for the goods I would let him know that shit aint cool, next time immediate drop kick to neck, Standard, no?

hansen jr. Sweden. Oct 19 2007 11:29. Posts 3735

rofl
i love your weekly drunk posts

chris United States. Oct 19 2007 11:38. Posts 5507

i vote for a reality TV show about your life be made ASAP.

5 minute showers are my 8 minute abs. - Neilly

EscapingR Netherlands. Oct 19 2007 11:49. Posts 2353

great story :D

LoVePlAyBoY Canada. Oct 19 2007 11:51. Posts 403

blowjob/weed.....man gays got the life

bigredhoss Cook Islands. Oct 19 2007 12:06. Posts 8649

lol wow

Truck-Crash Life

wHaTTaDo Germany. Oct 19 2007 12:09. Posts 1300

hahaha

vegable United States. Oct 19 2007 12:32. Posts 2453

don't accept any items or favors from gay people. It's like the #1 rule of prison man

but im sure you wanted it

Stir fry Normandy

PoorUser This user is a quality poster

United States. Oct 19 2007 12:34. Posts 7472

you know how i know you're gay?

Gambler Emeritus

Syntax United States. Oct 19 2007 12:53. Posts 4415

ummmmmm
wtf?
so u were letting some dude rub ur dick?
dude.....................................................................................................

wut wut wut

bannabop Canada. Oct 19 2007 13:15. Posts 81

Your posts never cease to amaze.
You really do need a reality show to showcase your life and 10 NL ballerness.

YoMeR United States. Oct 19 2007 13:33. Posts 12438

lol wow eZed

eZ Life.

ChoboPokeR_r Germany. Oct 19 2007 13:47. Posts 4598

--- Nuked ---

Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had?

Muhweli Finland. Oct 19 2007 13:59. Posts 10663

There's a difference between rape and letting someone do it, sir.

Floofy says: my dick is easily bigger than 90% of guys i checked it on the net | Floofy says: i im also doing movements

Baalim Mexico. Oct 19 2007 15:42. Posts 34305

u are not a hero anymore

Ex-PokerStars Team Pro Online

qwerty67890 New Zealand. Oct 19 2007 17:27. Posts 14026

LOL

HOMOPHOBES!

there was like denim and boxer between - its not like he had full contact

and it wasnt like i was letting him - as such - more i just didnt quite know what to do so let him think it was going somewhere. Im sure he returned home and rubbed one out over me.

I never got to see any weed.

Its all good practise before i go to vegas.

1kino1 Poland. Oct 19 2007 17:32. Posts 7

On October 19 2007 16:27 byrnesam wrote:
and it wasnt like i was letting him - as such - more i just didnt quite know what to do

subconsciousnes

JerseyMuscle United States. Oct 20 2007 00:41. Posts 197

ChipsOrGTFO ||| NeillyJQ: i need atleast 2 buy-ins, duh.

pushing4anal Australia. Oct 21 2007 07:26. Posts 665

i wanna suck ur dick byrnesam. PM me.

morph1 Sierra Leone. Nov 16 2007 10:14. Posts 2352

at 1st place : why the fuck did you go in gay club ?

Always Look On The Bright Side of Life

Last edit: 16/11/2007 10:15

Jelle Belgium. Nov 16 2007 12:39. Posts 3476

go to a shrink and tell him u went to a gay bar and then ended up with a guy rubbing ur dick in the alley and that u didnt resist

hilarity will follow

GroT	Last edit: 16/11/2007 12:41

Jelle Belgium. Nov 16 2007 12:40. Posts 3476

shrink: Why did you go to a gay bar?

sam: cuz i thought it'd be funny

shrink: I see

sam: are u saying i'm gay?

etc

GroT

Svenman87 United States. Dec 12 2007 13:30. Posts 4636

from the movie superbad...

'wow...

supergay...'