What is the dumbest thing you've done drunk? - Page 5

no in argentina for another 9 weeks at least (i hope) . live on isle of wight

one time i done that classic 'take this outside' thing u see on movies. at my mates house and his friendgroup came over and we were wasted and one of them was this total asshat who had skanked me for like 20 bucks fake green the other year right after i bought him a beer. back then i was like ok...what a knobend but leave it be coz i never see the guy and my mate (his mate) was so pissed off with him anyway. so like i come into the room where he is and he just fucking insults me for no reason (really emo looking camp kid who is also very condesending, you know the type?) so im like hey didnt you skank me weed and hes like yeh i did and i was like dont you feel bad about it or anything and hes like no and we start bsing and then im like you wanna take this outside then and he actually said yes and i lead him to the garden (2 guys follow)

so he starts coming towards me and we're all like pussy private school kids who never fight like this shit you know, so im like backing down the garden saying ah man i dont want to fight you after all , you dont want to do this do you, and hes like yes i do come on then come on , so i just fucking kung fu smash him in the face and hes down on the floor trying to get up again so i fucking roundhouse him in the face and he's flat out. then his mate jumped on me from behind but thats a different story (ended up with him trying to take a ladder to my window and me coming out with a knife. drunk shit). apparently the guy i hit when he was back into my mates house, took one look at his blood and then puked in the sink rofl fucking pansy. the above is probably not worth reading

On December 13 2006 15:28 Ibsu Bai Hui wrote: the above is probably not worth reading

put the warning at the beginning plz, thx

Isn't Isle of Wight for extrmely rich people?

On December 12 2006 15:31 Ibsu Bai Hui wrote: k well some of this is kinda bad.. lets see gave my $200 mobile to pay the shop for a burger, one of my friends was nearby and got it back for me locked myself out of apartment sat on floor for a few hours to get back in went out by myself drunk as fuck into a field and attacked all the traffic cones coz i heard a girl got raped, lost my flatmates keys in the process drove drunk to my friends. drove high as fuck (slow and scared as fuck) from one part of the beach to the other to have another joint (some ppl dont think this is a big deal but weed pretty much destroys me). went out to new years carnival with 1 friend, parked in the school, got wasted as fuck then came back and tore the shit out of one of the school football fields doing handbreak turns and racing up and down, was talked about on the radio the next morning (apparently the school cameras werent working that particular night or i wudda been dead). then drove home like a ralley driver >_> became an 'angry drunk' in the biggest club in the city one time, i can only remember looking up at the bouncers and crowd of people after they beat the fuck out of me, then apparently people tried to help me and i skitzed out coz i no idea what going on. been thrown out of main club at home mebbe 60% of the time, for sleeping or for 'apparently' being too drunk (they are fucking tight ass shits there). and probably for smoking weed. one time they threw me out i had just had enough of their shit and went down, bounced my fist off a window then went to find a bottle to throw at them outside, but fell over on top of it and cut my hand up, went back and showed them and asked to come in and wash my hand but they barred me and came back with some scraggy tissue so i got even more pissed and wiped my blood all over the club window until the police arrived, then i went to the street and the police told me to 'move along' and i started saying im just gonna sit here and wait for my friends but they were utter assholes and i told them to shut up and listen to me and then some random guys came and dragged me away before i got arrested. another time i tried to get in with a huge bottle of vodka in my hand then they pushed me away and i went to back of the queue and tried to hide it in my avril lavigne trousers but they searched me and then threw me on the ground. blah one time after got chucked out of the same club i took a bus to where i heard rumour that a friend might be, spent ages walking through the town screaming his name, paying to use ppls mobiles, then somehow got stuck in a field for like over an hour, the same fucking field i got electrocuted twice, tangled on barbed wire and fell headfirst through those massive clumps of stinging nettles, into a small river, twice. ended up crying in the middle of the field, dunno how i got out. um. apparently my friend buggered off home the other day coz i was 'chasing after one of the little beggar girls' . lost my shoes that night, no fucking clue how. other nights ive been here (argentina) i 'think' i got into a fight once (bruised knuckles and body the next day, no memory), almost got robbed twice, got skanked once. just before i came here we got trashed in my annex (mini house) and got film of me jumping up and down on a table, then my mom said the neighbour was going to call the police and i said 'its not my fault your neighbour is a dick' =( failed to fuck a hooker. one time hooked up with my 15 yo loveslave in london, lost wallet, spent the night at random irish middleaged mans house, failed to fuck (the girl). mm one time my mom came down in the morning and saw me face up on the floor with my eyes wide open and i didnt respond and she thought i was dead and started screaming (cant remember it), pretty bad. puked on stairs another time. started crying over a girl i loved first time i ever got drunk she had to lead me away for a chat, huk. rode a bike off a wall, chatted to the local member of parliment whist referring to him always as alan (partridge). took a canoe from school and dragged my friend down the road hill on it about a mile away. drank vomit. kissed several men, two gingers. and a fat middleaged woman lots more ill come back

You could write a book with this stuff and I would buy it for 40 dollars!
The title of the book can be the same as this thread.

When I get drunk I pass out. I am a super lightweight. =(

MAN ! i think someone should write a book just of this shit
that would be fucking funny...

On December 10 2006 15:41 LNinja wrote: a reallly long time ago when my first girlfriend broke up with me and tore my heart apart by cheating on me, i had my friend drive me over to her house and i had pissed on the snow writing fuck you, except i ran out of piss and had to finish off the writing with my hands.

hahah, awesome

On December 12 2006 15:31 Ibsu Bai Hui wrote: mm one time my mom came down in the morning and saw me face up on the floor with my eyes wide open and i didnt respond and she thought i was dead and started screaming (cant remember it), pretty bad.

lol, for some reason, that's hilarious

well its been almost 2 years, time for new stories ya ya?

hmm i dunno i done lots of stupid shit when i've been drunk

i blogged about how once i was out with friends, got super drunk (obv), then apparantly i tried calling my ex gf and sending her txt message (i don't remember any of this).

all i know is, i wake up next day with a msg on my fone from her saying 'jono how can u mess with my feelings like that, this isn't a funy joke' etc., apparantly i must've written about how i miss her so much haha

long story short, now we're back together and have been together for almsot 2 yrs? lol

Almost drank myself to death, final count was 28shots, a 6pack some really egg rolls and a Cuban cigar in about 30mins, spent the next 6hours hugging a toilet vomiting so much that I couldn't possible believe there was still anything left to throw up. Then tried to clean it up and bleached half my friend's towels and the rugs in his bathroom, his mother wasn't happy.

I used to say A TON of random stuff while being shitface drunk, boring and annoying people to death. I could rumble for hours. Didn't happen the last 3 times tho. I'm a new, better man now.

Oh god where do i start

Do you know that feeling when you wake up in the morning and you don't know how you got to your bed?

when i was a dumb kid i filled an empty gatorade bottle of tequila + gin that i took from my mother's stash and replaced it with water. i drank the whole thing in 15 mins before going to school, i was 15yo iirc. it is probably still the sickest thing that happened in that school, puke-wise. i puked myself and all my stuff during my math class and then went to the bathroom and thought i would go into a coma, i couldn't get up and laid on the bathroom floor puking bile for another 2 hours and a half.

my name is crownroyal and i can't even drink whiskey anymore without nearly puking from the smell of it hitting my nostrils

I once tried to tackle a half gallon of vodka with my friend and he gave up early on and although i didnt finish i did try to nail a 250lb 6'3 chick and made out with her and thank god she was on her period

Another time i tried to tackle a fifth of whiskey with my buddy and ended up apparently telling him that i thought he was good looking or coming onto him or something in his words anyway. That same night later on some girls came over and i told my buddies mom that this girl i didnt even know wanted my cock and i was gonna fuck her and shit and then i took my shirt off and threatened some guy on her phone and after she got off the phone i put my arm around her and said "I think it's time to get a little play" and i grabbed her tit haha.

countless other stories of making a retard of myself around girls trying to be cool


Recently i had a brand new set of tires on my truck and i took it out and successfully in 30 miles of drifting dirt roads ruined both back tires

I dunno i can't think of many that are actually really awesome but i can't remember any of the stories i posted here so far and they are purely buddies recollections. I'll try to think of some good ones

This is top 3

wtf happend iop

if i remember correctly, he fell down some stairs...

i broke my ankle, i stepped on a broken beer bottle, and i duno one night at echos house that i dont remember, but i hear i was RLY bad

all alcohol related incidents, and yes i'm a lightweight haha.

had sex on someones front lawn (it was down the street from a party i was at), and broke their mailbox

partied in san diego at my sisters house, and somehow woke up at home which is only 80 miles between the two didn't have my car so i know i didn't drive

rolled a bowling ball down tuscany hills, which is like a massive hill, and it went thru the new kfc they were building...

and probably the dumbest thing i've ever done was b&e when i was like 16 to impress some bitch lol

Heh, sick bump. I was at this bar quite a few years ago with my friends from school and we were all underage like 17 years old but were fortunate enough to look about 20 so it was pretty ez getting served J&B straight and Coronas every day. Anyway, we had been in there like almost every day after school. We were lucky back then because that place had just opened and they were serving fucking amazing food like squid ravioli in a lemongrass broth with goat cheese profiterolles and swordfish meatloaf with onion marmelade.

Anyway, pretty standard as the weekend approached we arranged a limo for later and all got a little bit hammered for Craig McDermott's birthday. Several J&Bs at Barcadia later and we slide into the limo wearing our pin stripe Valentino suits on the way to Espace (approx 20 min drive from Barcadia). The ride was absolutely terrible as Evelyn kept buzzing in my ear and all i wanted to do was listen to the latest Robert Palmer track. I was on the verge of tears by the time we arrived at Espace since I was positive we wouldn't have a decent table. But we did and i remember relief washing over me in an awesome wave. We had some nice sushi/seafood and a lot of Sake and of course more J&B for me.

Unfortunately after like half an hour Craig gets really fucking sick and we have to call it off early. Some of the group stayed at the sushi place and i catch a taxi to meet with Paul at Texarkana which is this fucking amazing BBQ/seafood restaurant. We order more J&B, Corono and double absolute Martini's and barely touch the food laying there then after about an hour we head back to my place for some more drinks. Paul had already had quite a few drinks and cant head home in this state so it was pretty standard. We finally arrive back at my place via taxi and head into the living room for some more drinks. I pop on my favourite Huey lewis track (Hip to be square) and gradually button my raincoat. Why the raincoat? Well, It didn't take me long to realise how much i actually hate Paul. I pick up my splitting Axe from behind the sofa and ecstatically launch it into his skull.

Now that I think about it, it was a good night, I just had to kill a LOT of people.