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Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 18:52. Posts 3432
Hey guyz whats up, I haven't been posting on the forums much lately at all but I have been playing a lot. So I came to a realization yesterday when talking to a friend because I said that if I had a paying job I would NEVER play poker again. Essentially, I would never have an urge to play, even if I made double the $$$ from poker that I made in my job. Anyway, lately played mostly 100 nl the last few months and my winrate is like 2 pt bb I would think, definitely not something worth doing for a living. I made 110k from poker 2 years ago while playing 50 hours a month and doing college, now I can barely make 60k with it being my sole commitment. I just came to the realization today that I would rather do almost anything than play poker, ANYTHING. I mean, if I was making 100k playing ssnl-msnl 30 hours a week, it still wouldn't be worth it ( I don't think).

The games are ridiculous these days compared to 2-3 years ago. Specifically, less donks, I think that is truly the only way I used to make my money. Now I play half the stakes, the players are twice as good, and my winrate is half as much. Fucking shitty. And the worst part is, is that I have gotten much better than I used to be. A lot of guys say that this is a stupid comment and that I just need to get better, well I think you guys just have a higher ceiling than me when it comes to poker talent.

I absolutely hate playing everyday, the times I used to like to play are like 1-2 times a week for maybe 4-6 hours. After long sessions I find it extremely hard to just relax. I think most of all is that I want something to be passionate about, and if I am not passionate about it (9-5 job) have it at least be somewhat easy. I think I just have a hard time fitting a normal social life into the framework of being an online poker player, I can't do it, I don't know how others do it unless they have many other friends that play online poker as well (I have zero, have almost never grinded with anyone).

So for now I don't know if I will be posting here anymore at all. If I continue to play poker it will probably be like 50k hands a month until I find something I want to do. I am 23 and am in my first year since graduating from college. I think I may want to go back to school for 2 years to be a high school teacher, or use my finance degree to get a 9-5 job right now(scary tho). I think the only real reason I played poker was because it was an easy out. I handled a transitional period in my life extremely bad (high school-college) because it was the first time in my life I didn't know what to do, it took me 2 years to get into a groove and be comfortable with where my life was going. But that was just a temporary relief, I now have no idea where my life is going again, and I really hope I make the right decisions quicker so I don't always feel like I need to make changes to make me feel satisfied with my place in the world.

I don't know how I will look back on my 4 years playing online poker, if it will be with regret or pride at making over 200k. I do think that I am glad I went down this road because it has made me a much better person because the game of poker makes someone understand themselves and their emotions so much better. I also think I know what I want from life much more, the value that is placed on social interactions is incalculable. I think I will be a much more unselfish person because of poker (as weird as it sounds). I also have much love for LP and think you guys almost always exhibit genuine humbleness and perspective, I think poker can have the ability to make people quite a bit wiser in a short period of time. I remember after playing for a few months I thought I was good and made a post in a guys poker hand thread saying something like "that is so fucking stupid" and Myth came in the next post and bitch smacked me by telling me to have some manner. That was one of my most memorable early times at lp because I learned a lot quickly after that.

So now I have 110k in my bank account that I saved up because I am so nitty irl : ) I think what I want to do is

1 figure out asap what I want to do with my life on a very long term committed plan

2 work out a lot

3 have a great time with my friends as much as possible, doing as many different hobbies as i can juggle

4 when I am not doing something really fun with my friends get to bed by midnight and wake up the next day ready to do something forward and productive with my life


Sorry for the emo post, but I am pretty down right now. I know these posts happen a lot these days, so please share your views as well, and potential criticisms too. I think it would be cool to hear other people's plan for the next few years of their life as well as your thoughts on poker after doing it for 3 or 4 years


And to leave an image so you can put a face to my screen name, here are 3 pics of me, Orange AnF shirt, guy, and red shorts about to jump off a 40 ft + waterfall in Hawaii this October (that is just one of the many things I am thankful for the opportunity for because of poker $$$ )







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My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMillerLast edit: 17/12/2009 19:30

Sicks Macks   United States. Dec 17 2009 18:56. Posts 3929

I think it's really impressive that you have such a realistic idea of your own limitations in poker. From what you wrote here, it sounds like trying something new right now is probably for the best. Good luck!

Mr. Will Throwit 

royalsu   Canada. Dec 17 2009 19:00. Posts 3233

cool. I came to the same realization last year and I'm the happiest I've ever been. The lack of stress from poker is amazing. Your brain is free to think about so much more instead of constantly replaying hands in your head.

Network and find friends, groups of people that will inspire you to a career.

Trust me you won't regret this decision.


acdawg712   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:09. Posts 2639

You are quite in a good situation to still have so much saved. You have the luxury relaxing for a extended period of time while considering your future choices. Really think about what job you would enjoy more. A finance degree at my school(Michigan) generally leads to a job in consulting or I-Banking. Consulting is somewhat normal with sometimes extended hours. I-Banking is like 100 hour weeks insane hours. A teaching job is nice is that it is usually not too stressful and doesn't require too many hours a week and allows for summers off. You can still play the poker you desire and maybe that is the best option.

phil hellmuth is genuinely a stupid person and he does not understand poker very well at all - [vital]myth 

Stim_Abuser   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:12. Posts 7499

why arnt you just crushing like 5/10 or 10/20 donks live with your 110k bankroll wtf?

live games are like 20x easier.

Hey Im slinging mad volume and fat stackin benjies I dont got time for spellin n shit - skinny pete 

Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:13. Posts 3432

What do you do now royalsu? And ya acdawg, i am looking into teaching mainly because of hours and stress level. If something is high stress it is ok as long as you love it or are ambitious about it imo.

My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMillerLast edit: 17/12/2009 19:14

terrybunny19240   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:16. Posts 13829

nice pics


DustySwedeDude   Sweden. Dec 17 2009 19:20. Posts 8623

GL HF, you're one of my favourite LPers as far as people I don't talk to much with goes. Hope all works out.


SpasticInk   Sweden. Dec 17 2009 19:32. Posts 6298

I thought u were bigger =[

but oh, good read - it's probably a wise decision and you are smart enough to have realized it.


Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:35. Posts 3432

lol ya in like 5'10 180, big_rob was such a shitty screen name for me because it makes me sound like such a meat head. I love sports, swimming, and running, but obviously I am quite nerdy too. I just made it big_rob because that was my nickname in high school mostly because it was goofy sounding.

My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMillerLast edit: 17/12/2009 19:36

collegesucks   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:45. Posts 5780

ever try live poker?

given your experience i think you could easily manage an hourly of like ~$100 at 5/10 if the game has a reasonable buy-in cap


collegesucks   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:46. Posts 5780

oh but i guess i missed the point of your post lol nvm


Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:49. Posts 3432

ya man, live poker would be kind of depressing, driving to a casino all the time to make $100 an hour, I think I would take a third of the pay and do something a bit more forward looking, wouldn't you?

My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMillerLast edit: 17/12/2009 19:52

Robinson47   United Kingdom. Dec 17 2009 19:52. Posts 992

insightful blog post. interesting to read your opinions on how tough the games are now, do you think the games will continue to get tougher, and maybe eventually die? if you no longer have the passion to play poker then i guess it is a good decision. Still, $100k in the bank as a 23 year old, not many people can say that. Best of luck in any future endeavours.

you think poker is more stressful than teaching?


Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:56. Posts 3432

I think that the state of the games will never get better. That was one important thing I have been thinking about that has weighed me down so much the past few months. The games will never be as easy as 2006 imo.

I think that a teaching job that involves interaction and a daily schedule would be less stressful than the way I play poker, which is 10 tabling 1k hands an hour for 20-30k hands a week. I hope this is the case and I am not just naive, though.

My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMiller 

collegesucks   United States. Dec 17 2009 19:58. Posts 5780

yeah it's super time consuming. i mean if you get a good game running, it's pretty much obligatory to stay for like 10~20 hours at least as that's where the majority of your profit is going to come from.

it seems like you'll have to make a ton of sacrifices to transition into a 9-5 job. i really like the high school teacher idea though cause you can get way more time off during holidays and vacations.


Xanthos   . Dec 17 2009 20:01. Posts 110

Hey BigRob,
I remember you from 3 years ago, when you were on your rise from 50nl to 100 to 200nl and I think I saw you at 400 a bit too. I am exactly on your boat. I was a fixed regular at 200nl for a year and half playing FR and even tried 400nl for a bit. I use to crush 200nl and easily win 400nl, just 7-8 months ago i stopped learning poker and took some breaks for traveling, then at one point I realized I cant beat the games... I started again, learning, improving, playing very focused, still just a marginal winner IF... poker is getting harder and harder, I was never really good but I went from crushing 200nl just to break even in just 2 years.

Right now I play lower stakes, just for fun basically and until I find job... I will always play poker but definitely not for living. If I feel any stress from it, I am staying away from that limit.. move down until I feel comfortable.

Anyways, like royalsu said, you wont regret this decision. You have made some money from this game now its time to move on.


One thing I want to add, for me when I was a student poker was just a game, thats when I was winning maybe, I think its same for alot of people as soon as poker because THE priority everything sseems to get alot tougher... not like oh well this isnt working out, ill just continue my school and dont care about poker.

and as for live poker lol... this guy is sick of poker you really think live poker is for him?
Fuck casinos, drive 30-40min wait for a game, pay extra rake get nothing back. get your money in good get sucked out on try to convenience yourself its a small sample loose focus and loose some more.

 Last edit: 17/12/2009 20:07

k2o4   United States. Dec 17 2009 20:05. Posts 4803

congrats on the success and if you feel like it's time to move on then go for it.

InnovativeYogis.com 

Big_Rob_48   United States. Dec 17 2009 20:11. Posts 3432

Thanks guys, really glad to hear someone like you, Xanthos, has similar experience. Definitely playing poker as your only responsibility is taxing

My AIM sn if you want to chat: YoRobbyMillerLast edit: 17/12/2009 20:14

whamm!   Albania. Dec 17 2009 20:17. Posts 11625

i think ill be quitting next next year. it shouldve been next year but meh, life's been so fucked up i kinda screwed myself with the quitting so i guess ill have to be tough enough to put up with another year of this shit lol


 
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