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longple goes yolo around the world

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longple    Sweden. Oct 31 2014 17:17. Posts 4404
Courageous people feel the same fear everyone else does, they just decide not to live like they're afraid anymore - Bob Goff

Intro

Me and a friend had a conversation once under psychadelic circumstances and as we sat there takeing in our surroundings he turned to me and asked:
We all know whats right and wrong, and we all know what we should do to be happy and take care of ourself and others, why arent we doing that?

This is something ive kinda thought about for most of my life and more so since he layed it out to me that straight up. Its something i think everyone
is familiar with as a human being. The constant struggle between hope and fear where fear is holding us back. Many philosophical characters claims that
all fear roots back to the fear of death, more or less. Sam harris has a really good lecture on this.



On the other side of the spectrum tho, you know that ”fighting spirit” type feeling u sometimes feel inside when ur about to give up but decides not to?
That feeling that feeds the knowing of: FUCK, i can fucking do this, if I really wanted to. So why arent I doing this again?

I started ranting/brainstorming many hours ago now in a textdocument wich i do from time to time and i got into reviewing big turning points in my life
and after a while i felt like i wanted to continue the rant in a blogpost since im in a writeing type of mood today. Also i had intentions in makeing a
blogpost about my upcomeing plans for the future so why not mixx the two of them together. They kinda go hand in hand in a sense afterall.

Turning points of my life

I spent 3 hours writing on this subject earlier today (and im still going strong lol) and im gonna try to sum it up more so in this text. Something ive
realised about all of this, and there is many good podcasts and lectures and books on this subject, when it comes to pushing urself outside of your
comfortzone to grow as a person. Today i thought about all the big turning points in my life.

* Like most kids i was haveing a really insecure childhood growing up in a small town enviorment trying to be someone i wasnt. Drinking moonshine
every weekend from the age of 13 and trying to be a ”badass” to fit in to the redneckhillbillystereotypical-type people that i went to school with.
At that point my biggest secret in the whole world was that i liked to play guitar, and that i was good at starcraft, good enough actually to play in the
swedish nationalteam. Alltho back then i would rather have committed suicide then telling any other kid that i was actually good at a computer game,
what a massive fucking nerd to actually be good at something u love, right. Fucking retarded kids. When i was 16 i moved out from my parents house and got a
job and a supersmall cheap appartment and started takeing care of myself in another city to study music/theater/photgraphy on my own at this ”hippie”type school
while all my old friends stayed. -> still live in that town and thank god i did what i did when i was 16.

* When i was 19-20 i quit my job and moved in under the stairs (literally under the stairs, harry potter! high five bro!) with 5 other guys in the
appartment for a rent of 70$/month since i wanted to persue poker, wich was what i really loved and what i wanted to do while everyone thought i was fucking
insane, alot of you can probably relate to this . I lived there and it took me about 1-2 years of hard work to really become good enough at poker to make
enough money to really live comforably on my own and move out from under the stairs as i eventually leveled up through the stakes.

* I wasnt fat when i was growing up, but i got really fucking fat 2011 for some reason, mostly due to a semidepression and well, just playing poker all day
I decided later that year to go to thailand to train and lose weight, and me and my friend spent 2 superstrict months training/eating healthy in patong. For you who know
where patong is in thailand, its the true core of hookers drugs and partying in phuket, but we stayed clean of everything since we got an appartment there + was motivated to succeed.
2 months later, i'd lost 25 kg (~55pounds). Sure im still a bit overweight today and have been in periods after that but im never gonna get that big again and since then ive
lived a pretty healthy life overall Especially this year.


Before/afterpicks from that time during the late ~2011 trip:
+ Show Spoiler +


+ Show Spoiler +


I stole the afterpic from raiderns LP interview he did with me, its from ~ that time, im not a big pictureperson
Ive for sure been blogging about that earlier, sorry to the blogfollowing readers for the repitition.

So? who cares..

So why am i bringing all of these ”big” events from my life up in this blog? Am i trying to brag about how i overcome some demons and managed to attain some success in life/poker?

What i came to realise as i was brainstorming in my bubble earlier this day was that all of those things that has shaped my life into something better
came from massive fucking action and pushing myself out of my comfortzone. Its so eye opening when u put it like that.

Another thing that has led me to success many times is hitting rock bottom, feeling fucking miserable over a broken heart, overweight, just being busto
at poker etc, and finding that fighting spirit, FUCK things needs to change. Ive done this multiple times in my pokercareer to get better at poker.
Again end of 2012-2013 was such a period for me, i was heartbroken from a girl, i was busto degening away 100s of thousands of dollars like a maniac and i was staked with big depts.
I struggled with panic anxiety and other stuff for the first time in my life, I was gaining weight again and i was really really fucking scared for a period of time there.

What about it? Time went on, a year or so passed and I got my shit together, I realised, wtf am i doing? Am i just gonna give up? The kid that wanted to be the best in the world first in
starcraft, then in poker? Are you fucking kidding me? I started working out again, i got my pokershit together i worked in flopzilla, CREV, HEM and i worked hard again and what happened?
I started winning again (duh?!), i attained SNE and i payed back my depts. To tie this rant up, it was that fighting spirit that got me back on track. Like it has been time and time again.

Its more then okey to fail guys, but never fucking give up.

Moveing on..

Future? BJJ around the world!





Onwards to the bigger news that i wanted to blog about in the first place. Here it comes

Today i booked a one way ticket to Australia, a chain reaction from many things through my life, but lately breaking up with my gf earlier this year
due to not being ready yet. Simple as that, i wanna do these things im gonna do now before settleing down. Im sure i will come to realise in the future
that it is just settleing down, haveing kids and giveing nothing but love to your family is what life is all about and what i want to persue, but at
this point. I dont know it yet, i have to realise that first.

This is it. I hate it when people complain or come with excuses to why they arent doing something but something i hate more is when i catch myself doing it and
since im a person i assure you, it happends alot . This travel the world on my own thing is something ive had in my mind for many years now and
now its fucking time. Ive kind of felt like i wanted to become the pokerplayer first, and that all my time has to go into poker for me to achieve anything close
to that before doing this, wich is kind of a stupid mentality overall imo ”im gonna do what i want, after im done with this thing first, and then theres this other
thing after that, and then this other thing, THEN im gonna do it for sure”



My plan is to have no plan, basically. Im a pretty introverted humble person IRL, believe it or not, that rarely takes alot of space in social
situations and i want to force myself to get better at this, therefor im gonna start this quest traveling on my own for the true first time. I
also want to keep getting in better shape aswell as getting better at BJJ.

My goal is to start the ”adventure” without a laptop and to stay at hostels to really push myself to talk to random people and not fall back on the grind or internet. Im gonna train BJJ in sydney, i found some interesting gym near bondibeach wich im gonna start with. Do that for a few weeks to later meet up
with a friend whos traveling in australia atm, she asked me if i wanted to go snorkling in the great barrier reef with them in december and i figured it can be a good milestonegoal to have on my timeline.

After that i want to travel around australia for a few months and train BJJ at different gyms, buy some cheap small laptop and combine some grind with
the backpacking lifestyle.

Why blog?



Im really nervous. Ive never backpacked or traveled alone really before and its a bit scary. Im not stacked on money and i suck at PLO so my weak laazy
comfortzone half tells me that alot of things can go wrong, will they tho? Do i have much to lose? Whats the worst thing that can happen?

Im pretty sure i will learn some stuff atleast and hopefully i can add this trip to my next "brainstorming-over-past-turning-points-session"

I plan on committing to a BJJ around the world type thing and ill try to blog alot about life, traveling, BJJ and poker as i go on this adventure. Ive
been going back and fourth on blogging about it thinking in the terms of ”why do i need to make this public, am i so insecure that i want people to know
that im going for it?” and then i think, why the fuck not. It might motivate me, committ me and push me. Maybe it will keep me company at some times when
im alone for days and it can surely help me keep in contact with people at home, pokerfriends and such that will be reading my blog. Maybe i can inspire some
people as im a believer of not haveing everything figured out. My brother was almost murdered recently and me, and my family kinda realised
(wich we all know deep inside) that anything can happen, at any time. U think the variance in PLO is sick? Variance in life is even sicker and there is nothing
holding us back really from pushing it.

I do have plans, but i dont wanna plan everything to much for my future with where i wanna travel and with poker and such. Things can happen realisations can
be made and im just gonna start with the one way ticket to australia and see where that take me, with intentions of advanceing from my whitebelt status in
BJJ and to travel around alot, meet alot of people, see and experience alot of things.

Cliffs

Yolo



U all know im a rogan fan, and i know many of you are aswell.



If u read the entire thing, thanks for reading, please leave some comments/PMs with anything on your mind, insight/tips/questions what ever. let me know if
ur in australia the upcomeing months or if u have any tips on where to go or where to train BJJ etc.

Gl with everything guys <3

0 votes

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 Last edit: 24/11/2014 09:13

SF   Sweden. Oct 31 2014 18:17. Posts 2

Almost made my day man.
The best of luck, and just want to tell you that this blog got snapp-bookmarked.

Aaaand stay away from SvS NL pleez


k4ir0s   Canada. Oct 31 2014 18:33. Posts 3306

Reading this really stirred up some feelings, I can relate alot to it.

"Why aren't we doing what makes us happy?"

........... I often think about this, my mind always goes blank I try to answer it. it really depresses me.

" Ive kind of felt like i wanted to become the pokerplayer first, and that all my time has to go into poker for me to achieve anything close
to that before doing this, wich is kind of a stupid mentality overall imo"

So many of us share this fearful, procrastinating mentality. I know when I think about travelling, I have fearful thoughts like.. "What if I fall behind, and unable to make money off this game anymore? What will I do then?" "What if a family member becomes unwell while I'm gone", or the worst thought "What if I feel the same way I feel now, even after accomplishing what I thought would make me feel happy?"

I dont know what a dt drop is. Is it a wrestling move? -Oly 

mnj   United States. Oct 31 2014 18:40. Posts 3848

http://youtu.be/Yyr4QM_Q86w?t=34s

 Last edit: 02/11/2014 17:41

GoTuNk   Chile. Oct 31 2014 18:57. Posts 2752

I just want to add that I think a big part of growing up is realizing what you really like doing vs what you are doing because of what other people expect of you

After 24 years, for the last year or so I've increasely gotten happier and happier.

What I've basically done is:

Have a winners mentality.

This takes time; read motivational books, podcasts, videos, etc. Some people call this new age crap, but you will find it works for most people. Believe that you are awesome while you become your version of aweosme.


Try to do more of what you like, do less of what you don't like

Lift weights, read books, be around people I like (frieneds, people I've met at the gym, my soon to be gf)

Do not neglect: have sex. make more money

Would love to exchange lifting knowledge for some poker. Just talking, msg anyone interested :D


PuertoRican   United States. Oct 31 2014 19:22. Posts 10570

Sweet blog!

Stay focused on your dreams, and you will continue to do great things in life~

Rekrul is a newb 

Twisted    Netherlands. Oct 31 2014 20:04. Posts 10422

Great blog!

I share a lot of your thoughts and lately (and this is a very new thought to me as well) that I should maybe do a trip around the world as well, on my own. I don't really have the means right now, but I might in 6 months or whatever and depending on my situation then, I might just do it.


dogmeat   Czech Republic. Nov 01 2014 00:15. Posts 6374

this is pretty fckin stupid... pokers dying soon and you are taking an easy way out instead of grinding another year or two, the answer is to have balanced lifestyle, not becoming a busto hippie. taking a break for 2years is the only thing i regret in my whole life

ban baal 

longple    Sweden. Nov 01 2014 04:20. Posts 4404


  On October 31 2014 17:17 SF wrote:
Almost made my day man.
The best of luck, and just want to tell you that this blog got snapp-bookmarked.

Aaaand stay away from SvS NL pleez



Thx, means alot who are u on svs?


  On October 31 2014 17:33 k4ir0s wrote:
Reading this really stirred up some feelings, I can relate alot to it.

"Why aren't we doing what makes us happy?"

........... I often think about this, my mind always goes blank I try to answer it. it really depresses me.

" Ive kind of felt like i wanted to become the pokerplayer first, and that all my time has to go into poker for me to achieve anything close
to that before doing this, wich is kind of a stupid mentality overall imo"

So many of us share this fearful, procrastinating mentality. I know when I think about travelling, I have fearful thoughts like.. "What if I fall behind, and unable to make money off this game anymore? What will I do then?" "What if a family member becomes unwell while I'm gone", or the worst thought "What if I feel the same way I feel now, even after accomplishing what I thought would make me feel happy?"




Something ive read many times that is really starting to sink in to me i think is that everyone is fucking scared and everyone thinks everything is easier for everyone else. Wich is complete horseshit.

Its never going to stop being scary, or easy. Its all relative, theres people i know think that alot of things ive done in life is crazy and scary and "i could never have done that", or that think my success in poker comes from "wow u must be so talanted getting that good in poker, how lucky u are". No im fucking not, ive put down 90% of my life working my ass off on this rollercoaster of a "career", im a fucking dedicated person and i was obsessed and loved the game for so many years and thats why i got good.

Makeing any decisions or takeing any steps in life that is outside of your comfortzone is always going to be scary, like the quoute in the beginning of the blog, its never going to stop being scary and ive just started to realise that more and more over the years but more so im rideing this wave of realisation that u cant think ur way out of these things, the only thing that matters is actions, and actions like that is never going to be easy.


  On October 31 2014 17:40 mnj wrote:
http://youtu.be/Yyr4QM_Q86w?t=34s



I can def see how there can be a thin line between being courageous/naive for sure. as i dont know much else about him then what he said in the video, maybe im stupid ive watched it 2 times now and i dont have much to say about it, maybe u can help me out in why u posted it?


  On October 31 2014 17:57 GoTuNk wrote:
I just want to add that I think a big part of growing up is realizing what you really like doing vs what you are doing because of what other people expect of you

After 24 years, for the last year or so I've increasely gotten happier and happier.

What I've basically done is:

Have a winners mentality.

This takes time; read motivational books, podcasts, videos, etc. Some people call this new age crap, but you will find it works for most people. Believe that you are awesome while you become your version of aweosme.


Try to do more of what you like, do less of what you don't like

Lift weights, read books, be around people I like (frieneds, people I've met at the gym, my soon to be gf)

Do not neglect: have sex. make more money

Would love to exchange lifting knowledge for some poker. Just talking, msg anyone interested :D



agreed


  On October 31 2014 18:22 PuertoRican wrote:
Sweet blog!

Stay focused on your dreams, and you will continue to do great things in life~



thx!
im a beliver


  On October 31 2014 19:04 Twisted wrote:
Great blog!

I share a lot of your thoughts and lately (and this is a very new thought to me as well) that I should maybe do a trip around the world as well, on my own. I don't really have the means right now, but I might in 6 months or whatever and depending on my situation then, I might just do it.



Thx mate
Another thing ive learned is that its pretty hard being a person and thats fine. U dont need all the answers and ur not supposed to have them, thats why we explore and seek, probably u can find the answers right under your nose, and maybe u wont find them ever if you continiously search for things around the world, who knows.
I just feel personally that this is something i need to get off my chest, i need to prove to myself that i can do this, that i can go on my own and meet new people and see new things and train martial arts at random gyms over the globe, cuz thats what i would like to see myself doing in a dreamworld, oh i can actually do it in real life too.
Eventually tho im pretty sure i will come to realise, cuz ive already had this realisation kind of that what matters is, what people have commented on here to day: stay somewhat healthy, do things ur somewhat interested in, have love in your life and boom, u need nothing else.

The material world has never really interested me to much, when it has come to poker i kind of wanted to be the best and i liked to beat people, thats honestly it, at the core. Ive never bought anything expensive in my entire life, or lived in a fancy way, and ive sat on alot of money in some parts of my life. As an example ive never had a good car, ive for the past 5 years only owned a shitty old bike that i use to get around on. I know that money is not gonna make me happy, personally, and that i realised a long time ago, aslong as i have enough to get by ill be fine. Honestly i dont even feel to bad about grinding something else "for money" as im starting (if ever, well see what happends ) setteling down. I can easily see myself being a nurse, for example. What i want for the future is a somewhat simple life with the right perspectives, where im doing some things that i like doing and i have loveing people that i love around me.

So yea, as im getting to dogmeats comment i guess this answers some of his nonesense too.


  On October 31 2014 23:15 dogmeat wrote:
this is pretty fckin stupid... pokers dying soon and you are taking an easy way out instead of grinding another year or two, the answer is to have balanced lifestyle, not becoming a busto hippie. taking a break for 2years is the only thing i regret in my whole life




shocking comment comeing from you, If i wanted money and only money maybe i could agree with you and thank spagettimonster i dont.

as i mentioned in the blog i dont really believe in the "suffer now to live later" mentality, or atleast i dont want to anymore in the same extent.
For the record its not like im quitting poker yet or anything, i will just tone it down a bit from 150-200hours/month to maybe, idk 60 hours/month? We'll see what happends.

Some people say its the easy way out, some think its the complete opposite, it depends on what u want i guess

 Last edit: 01/11/2014 04:25

longple    Sweden. Nov 01 2014 04:36. Posts 4404

I also like to say that suffer now to live later is something ive done for some time now.

I didnt get SNE 2013 or worked hard on my pokergame cuz i really truly loved the game anymore, i lost that somewhere around those times. I worked my ass off for over a year putting pretty much all of my wakeing time last last year on poker, and got SNE to SECURE some money, so that i could pay back all of my depts by 2014. Because it fucking had to be done if i wanted to pay these people who trust me back their money. And like ive said in previous blogs, when i was done with paying back the big depts i didnt really have the same hardworking mentality anymore.

I tryed for 6 months this year to continue down the same road, and i put in 150+ hours every month, on SNE phase to "make money for myself this year" and what did i come to realise, that i fucking hate it. Thats why i quit NL, i dont wanna play 150 hours every month only to maximise profits when i dont play for anything else then money itself.

Thats why i switched to PLO, to see if i can have fun again, cuz i know that if i have fun, and get motivated i will automatically put in a ton ton ton of effort into it, cuz thats the kind of person i am, i and i think everyone has some of that in them, dedication.

The true easy way out for me would be to fucking sit at home and grind NL for another 2 years


SF   Sweden. Nov 01 2014 04:48. Posts 2

SF = Starfit = Starfilter and since I hade some trouble with a stalker my nick is changed to Guldtass.


longple    Sweden. Nov 01 2014 05:14. Posts 4404


  On November 01 2014 03:48 SF wrote:
SF = Starfit = Starfilter and since I hade some trouble with a stalker my nick is changed to Guldtass.



Aha! Nice of u to stop by

Really means the world when i get comments like yours, and its something ive tryed to get better at aswell cuz i know how much it means to me when people takes time in their life to show that they enjoyed the read or think that some1 is an inspiration or anything positive/feedback related really. We, people, are kinda bad at giveing others good compliments, like real compliments not like "ohh, i like your new haircut" cuz we're forced to say that, i mean showing real kindness and stuff. Theres so many times ive thought positive things about people but never said anything cuz, i really dont know why tbh... Anyways this is turning into a rant, i think every1 got what im trying to say

best of luck to u aswell!


iop   Sweden. Nov 01 2014 05:41. Posts 4924

Happy to read this blogpost.

Milkman lol i didnt spend half a thousand on a phone so i could play it cool and be all stealth 

dogmeat   Czech Republic. Nov 01 2014 05:56. Posts 6374


  On November 01 2014 03:20 longple wrote:
as i mentioned in the blog i dont really believe in the "suffer now to live later" mentality, or atleast i dont want to anymore in the same extent.

sure, but sne equals ~4h a day, you could pursue w/e you want while pocketing 300k a year. obv i dont know your financial situation and how you invested your money, but you certainly dont want to end up working some non-qualified job in the future. you worked hard, burnt out, started hating your life and the game and wanted a change, i understand you, i was there too, i had several panic disorder incidents, even heart arytmia, grinding x hours on crazy sleeping schedule, living alone, eating junk, ended up taking a break and now i see it as a bad decision. ... its always easier to quit than fix your bad habits, but you should be thinking more about the future imo

ban baal 

Romm3l   Germany. Nov 01 2014 08:58. Posts 284


  On November 01 2014 04:56 dogmeat wrote:
Show nested quote +

i had several panic disorder incidents, even heart arytmia, grinding x hours on crazy sleeping schedule, living alone, eating junk, ended up taking a break and now i see it as a bad decision. ... its always easier to quit than fix your bad habits, but you should be thinking more about the future imo

whoa.. im sure your advice is well meaning but this is just about the least convincing argument i've ever seen for sacrificing today for tomorrow


longple    Sweden. Nov 01 2014 09:09. Posts 4404

i hear what ur saying dogmeat, and ive gone over this many times in my head. I just dont agree, for me its not worth it at this point, since alot of money isnt what i want in the end. I think im fine adjusting to what ever "fate" i will have regarding money and makeing money. Also, atleast for me, its not really that simple to just sit down and just play for 4 hours and make 300k a year at this game really.

Not that it matters but

 Last edit: 01/11/2014 09:11

Romm3l   Germany. Nov 01 2014 09:59. Posts 284

enjoyed the post longple, you come across as a great and v likeable guy and im genuinely hoping you find the things you're looking for.

your attitude to money and happiness is extremely good and admirable, and not needing a high expense lifestyle to be happy is going to be incredible for your future prospects. You seem to have the important things figured out pretty well and have the balls to follow through. obv it would be ideal if you had managed to save a bit more money from the best days of poker, since that makes things much easier. however i doubt this is going to weigh on your chances of getting the most out of life / lasting happiness etc. i also agree that money and happiness have a seriously nonlinear relation and grinding a high hourly now is def not better than having a much lower hourly later in life if the thing you're doing later is making you more happy than grinding hard is now.

actually we met a few months ago but just in a casual setting with a big group of people. at the time you came across as a slightly introverted guy who's not quite satisfied with life and semi-thinking of ways to solve that - something that describes 23489235 guys i've met from poker and was me for years as well. in this setting in a first meeting we're not exactly going to get into these kinds of deep conversations, but it's great you share these thoughts on here. looks like you're taking the leap and going allin. that nervousness you're feeling now is exactly the awesome feeling that makes life worth living, and the next couple years of ur life are likely going to be some of ur most memorable ones.

best of luck mate


Fayth    Canada. Nov 01 2014 10:58. Posts 10048


  On October 31 2014 23:15 dogmeat wrote:
this is pretty fckin stupid... pokers dying soon and you are taking an easy way out instead of grinding another year or two, the answer is to have balanced lifestyle, not becoming a busto hippie. taking a break for 2years is the only thing i regret in my whole life



lol as if poker was the only thing that can get you a decent amount of money, you look so miserable

Im not sure what to do tomorrow when I see her, should I shake her hand?? -Floofy 

casinocasino   Canada. Nov 01 2014 15:20. Posts 3273

Will reread your blog post again after.. but you mentioned snorkeling... I moved to the St Maarten earlier this year, and I bought a spear-gun and a Hawaiian sling.. I recommend it... its good fun as snorkeling on its own is gets boring, now I catch my own fish 2-3 times a week and get some decent exercise in while improving on a hobby I enjoy.... last time I went I caught 3 fish and a conch (sea snail)...was good eating and better fun.


bigredhoss   Cook Islands. Nov 01 2014 15:24. Posts 8560

awesome blog, was kind of surprised how much i seem to have in common with your life.


  Another thing that has led me to success many times is hitting rock bottom, feeling fucking miserable over a broken heart, overweight, just being busto
at poker etc, and finding that fighting spirit, FUCK things needs to change.



i'm still trying to figure out how to deal with this cycle in a healthy and productive way. anytime i've ever accomplished anything difficult or that i was proud of has always come from feeling deeply unhappy about something. maybe a year ago i was probably at my peak happiness, everything from health to friendships to girls was better than i ever imagined it would be. but since then i've been gradually regressing in some ways because i got too comfortable.

idk, there has to be a more zen way to deal with it T_T

Truck-Crash Life 

 
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