life tilt by Royalsu

hmmm i'm quitting poker once again. I don't have what it takes to control my tilt sessions. This exact same thing happened near exam time last semester too.

In two months I turned 2k into 26k at 200nl but this last week has been brutal. I lost 30 buyins at 200nl in one day and managed to make some of it back. Then I decided that since no one folds at 200nl I'd move up to 400nl. I ran super hot winning close to 10 buyins in 2000 hands but then in a span of 20 minutes I was down to even again. I then played 12 hours of solid poker with no tilt and made 4k. Today I just dropped 6k at 400nl and my bankroll is at 10k.

In one infamous 30 seconds of tilt I donated 1.5k headsup to this one guy when I pushed A6off on a QJ4 flop and he insta calls with KQ for 1400$ pot. Very next hand I get it all in on a J444 flop with 88 when he obviously has a Jack in his hand (also a 1400 pot). So this shortstack with 240 ends up with a nice 2k stack. GG me.

i've cashed everything out and I'm going to focus all my energies on school again. I've really enjoyed this community and the guys I met in vegas are awesome dudes. However, I'm going to have to stop reading liquid for my own good because everytime I read hand histories I have an urgent need to go play some poker.

I can crush 200nl and 400nl eventually, but I can't beat this game called life.

I hope you guys don't miss my hand histories too much.

Michael

loosing 30 buy ins in 1 day is sick.

anyways gl.

sorry to see you go but ive witnessed your tilt and its some wild shit.

today i lost 2 buy-ins at NL10

then went to the shops and bought 12 buyin-s worth of clothing

life as a professional NL10 balla is good.

hey mate - tough stuff. But i am quite sure i used to play 25 and 50NL with you 1.5 years ago and you now have 10K - i still play 50NL with 3k. So you have done well and obviously have a good aptitude for poker. You will be back. Believe me there are more important things in life than poker and money.

I always thought ur the best 200nl player here... didnt know about ur tilt problems but obviously your doing the smart thing.
good luck.

On July 23 2007 23:18 Verbloten wrote: there are more important things in life than money.

no need to lie

well sam, even if antonius wasnt rich im sure he can have plenty of fun lol

On July 23 2007 23:21 byrnesam wrote: Show nested quote + On July 23 2007 23:18 Verbloten wrote: there are more important things in life than money. no need to lie

dont delude yourself into thinking that life isnt run by money and what it can buy yourself and your family(happiness)

good luck in all your future endeavors

family are the most important thing - mostly the health of your family members and yourself. you'll learn this one day when you have a family of your own. Money makes life easier though for sure - but i can guess that the expression money doesn't buy happiness is spot on.

On July 23 2007 23:31 Verbloten wrote: family are the most important thing - mostly the health of your family members and yourself. you'll learn this one day when you have a family of your own. Money makes life easier though for sure - but i can guess that the expression money doesn't buy happiness is spot on.

QFT

I pulled a double-miracle marathon session today

7,077 hands that went like

-down 6 buyins
-up 6 buy-ins
-down 5 buy-ins
-up 5.25 buy-ins
-quit

Such an exhausting shitty session and all through it I was just thinking about what life would look like if I had stayed in college

Then I won back my losses for the second time, tipped over a quarter of a buy-in in the green, calculated my winnings and saw that I still made over $30/hour

My parents both have degrees and have been working their whole lives and neither of them make even that much

You'll be back

i really cant play during exam times i am just too stressed out but im too degen i still wanna try it

sux but best option imo i just cutting out poker during these times

you'll be back
good luck

the key is MODERATION

On July 23 2007 23:01 royalsu wrote: Then I decided that since no one folds at 200nl I'd move up to 400nl.

lol

On July 24 2007 02:03 hansen jr. wrote: Show nested quote + On July 23 2007 23:01 royalsu wrote: Then I decided that since no one folds at 200nl I'd move up to 400nl. lol

When ever someone says something like this, they aren't thinking very well at the given time

good choice :-)

On July 24 2007 03:34 Liquid`Drone wrote: good choice :-)

die you hippie! :D

Sucks to hear and obviously way more to go through what you did, but hope you find whatever it is you're looking for through education then and I'd have to agree with verb on money not buying happiness but it def does help.

Why don't you quit playing every time you make a stupid move? I do that and it works really fine. Impossible to drop 30 BI that way.

i am listening to cryfayce songs as i read this thread
and i've been considering cashing out and leaving poker alone for a while
but monies keep me coming back
even still i wish you best of luck and sucks and we all love you so don't feel sad just take it easy then come back and crush the donks

On July 23 2007 23:14 byrnesam wrote: today i lost 2 buy-ins at NL10 then went to the shops and bought 12 buyin-s worth of clothing life as a professional NL10 balla is good.

o i got new socks too yesterday

i also spent 1.5 buy-ins on a cheese cake

10bbs on a birthday card

and 45bbs on a McDonalds quarterpounder

then i came home and dropping another buyin.

now im gonna go to the garage and drop another buy in

coach me instead

why not just play shorter sessions? if you say to yourself "i'm just gonna play 1000 hands" and stick with it no matter how the session goes you probably won't tilt much. at least i found that i tilt a lot more in longer sessions. anyway whatever your choice, i wish you good luck.

like everyone said - you're a solid player (when you're not tilting, obv) and you'll probably be back

but either way, best of luck man

On July 24 2007 05:44 byrnesam wrote: and 45bbs on a McDonalds quarterpounder

you got ripped off hardcore, the mcdonald's here only charges me 1bb for a quarterbounder

On July 24 2007 07:38 JojackLS wrote: Show nested quote + On July 24 2007 05:44 byrnesam wrote: and 45bbs on a McDonalds quarterpounder you got ripped off hardcore, the mcdonald's here only charges me 1bb for a quarterbounder

they charge you 10 cents? wow thats an awesome mcdonalds.

On July 24 2007 10:52 Heath_at_Uk1 wrote: Show nested quote + On July 24 2007 07:38 JojackLS wrote:   On July 24 2007 05:44 byrnesam wrote: and 45bbs on a McDonalds quarterpounder you got ripped off hardcore, the mcdonald's here only charges me 1bb for a quarterbounder they charge you 10 cents? wow thats an awesome mcdonalds.

a big blind is not the same amount for everyone

On July 24 2007 10:52 Heath_at_Uk1 wrote: Show nested quote + On July 24 2007 07:38 JojackLS wrote:   On July 24 2007 05:44 byrnesam wrote: and 45bbs on a McDonalds quarterpounder you got ripped off hardcore, the mcdonald's here only charges me 1bb for a quarterbounder they charge you 10 cents? wow thats an awesome mcdonalds.

You mean 2 cents, right? Don't think JoJackls is ready for the 10 NL big league yet

technically my estimates werent right because everything i bought today was in NZD and im too lazy to convert it all into USD

this makes me sad

From your story your bankroll should be at 18 000 and not 10 000.


Did you cash out?


You coulda donated your bro that 6000 you loss, he would have done a lot more with it.

Poker destroys souls.


99% of people out there that play poker on a fulltime basis or plays it long enough never seem to be the same ever again.

boring

On July 23 2007 23:14 byrnesam wrote: today i lost 2 buy-ins at NL5000 then went to the shops and bought 12 buyin-s worth of clothing

you spent $60,000 on clothes?

On July 24 2007 11:42 byrnesam wrote: you spent $60,000 on clothes?

ya he bought one of Johnny Chan's shirts

Channel your poker awesomeness through me, seriously. I don't tilt so I've already saved us a huge problem there.

I too wish to spend $60k on clothes in a day

yesterday I lost 17k in a really really bad running session at 1000nl and this morning I woke up, opened my book, and filed the whole thing under "not important."

I lost 1700 playing tournaments Sunday and the next day I bought some clothes from AE and Nordstroms. When I go on losing streaks, I like to spend money b/c for some reason I feel like if I go busto in poker, at least I have some cool shit to show for it.

i lost 2k yesterday and 2k today, got a doctors bill for $600 that my insurance isnt covering, my car broke down which cost 200 to fix, and my credit card bill for 1.2k is coming on friday
got a lot of grinding to do...

ive also considered quitting poker maaaaany times cuz i play badly too often and im not rly sure im good enough to beat NL200 as is but for some reason just like keanureaver said i always come back...idk if its the money for me, but its something nonetheless

o and best of luck to u man, u obviously were successful in ur prior endeavors w poker, hope to see u back!!

i have some advice i use myself -
DO NOT TILT
its easier than it sounds.
just don't tilt.

i do tilt too, but when i tilt i cashout, and hope to run better :D, so now i am at 8800$ br, withdrew 5K$ and tilted quite a lot, now i am sitting and hoping to recover and be able not to drop to 100nl =]
You shouldnt have cashed out everything, you could have left like 1k, and play 50nl time to time, when you are completly bored and have nothing to do or smth like that.
Life tilt sucks man, i am on it current, feeling shitty just because of this game, and it seems like the whole world currently colapsed.
anyway gl in whatever you are going to do next, but i still suggest you to play some poker time to time

On July 24 2007 11:42 byrnesam wrote: you spent $60,000 on clothes?

no, but it sounds pretty ridiculous so i had to post it ~_~

lost 14k in about 4 days. I played about 18 hours of poker yesterday in two 10k+ hand sessions with no food and probably 300ml of water. There's a whole libary of ugly hands and sessions that I didn't talk about like squeezing shortstacks with 52off or calling a 5bet with KJoffsuit.

In my poker account I have 200$ in tourny money and a 1.5k supernova bonus to clear but I just don't have any desire right now to sit at a poker table. There are certain guys out there whose names will put me on insta-tilt.

Poker is a great game when the money flows in so easily. But most of the successful people here are able to keep poker and life separate, i.e. their mood is not affected a lot by how poker is going. They're able to still be outgoing with their friends even after a shitty session. I have an addictive personality and I constantly replay hands I've played in my head even when I'm talking with friends. I even dream about poker hands all the time. And playing 14 hour sessions after being awake for 10 hours with no food is not very healthy. This truly is a "sic life" (Elky with his french accent).

you're a lifer, you'll be back
everyone here including you knows you're too good to not play
ever think of playing lower so you don't care so much about the money?

I'll clear those bonuses for you Royalsu.


Ship that account password over here.

Royalsu, come here in Montreal, I'll give you the tools to help you control your mind.



The problem is you have mindset leaks that you haven't fixed. These mindset leaks are the same kind of money losing leaks donkeys have when they can't fold their shitty hands oop.


You'll be back crushing these limits in no time.

Well, honestly, I think we all expect you to be back, after having been where you are now at some point in our poker careers....

BUT

if poker really fucks you up as much as you say it does, it's probably best that you stay away. Best of luck with w/e you decide.

I agree that all the people who play or pretend to play poker for a living have definitelly changed because of this game, actually some of them change their personalities in a ridiculously fast way, some people are not even alike than how they were before in matter of 2 years.

I'm sure a few of the people here including me are thinking the same thing

"Yayyy no more royalsu at my tables! PARTY!"

But really though, it's sad. Hope you find contentment in the college path

On July 24 2007 18:22 Baal wrote: I agree that all the people who play or pretend to play poker for a living have definitelly changed because of this game, actually some of them change their personalities in a ridiculously fast way, some people are not even alike than how they were before in matter of 2 years.

For young winning players, it is the best thing $$/hr they have ever discovered yet the price they pay for it is in enormous amouns of mental mindfucks.


I'm sure the addiction that goes along with gambling has a large thing to do with it. Degeneracy seeps deep into their bones.

What's wrong with being a degenerate?

On July 24 2007 18:22 Baal wrote: I agree that all the people who play or pretend to play poker for a living have definitelly changed because of this game, actually some of them change their personalities in a ridiculously fast way, some people are not even alike than how they were before in matter of 2 years.

Just need to find a balance in life yo. Otherwise you end up being another degenerate loser.

Way to keep myself under control:

Work out in the mornings the first thing before i do anything else, relax in spas etc.

Seriously go out with friends, drink a bit, relax in that way too. Esp on weekends. Just take time off poker on weekends and not even think about poker if you're running horribly.

I picked up smoking as a result too but that's a different story.

Then grind the fuck out of the weekdays. Get a set # of hrs or # of hands and stick with it no matter what. Although i put in extra time when the tables are especially good and cut it a little short when tables suck horribly (this problem isn't very big at NL200 :o)

It's good that you're taking a break from poker tho. Looks like you really need it. I haven't had the pleasure of playing with you but judging from HH's you seemed like a pretty soild/fun player to play against ;D

On July 24 2007 19:49 Zealeo wrote: What's wrong with being a degenerate?

nothing wrong with it if you wanna go busto and be in a very bad financial spot all your life.

concur with yomer
although i take it too far i think, i need to prioritize poker a little higher
which is why i wish i was good at tourneys, because i could play them for hours on end np
of course i end up wanting to hang myself for not winning them, but wtv

Btw don't forget to check this

capaneo you are the man

poker mind fucked me a lot. I spend money like water now. I spent 6k in a span of like 2 weeks when I went to vegas and toronto and maybe only 500$ of that was things I kept: i.e clothes. Probably 2k on restaurents, 2k for clubbing/drinks for girls (in vegas we went clubbing 5 nights in a row), the rest on hotels/cab fares, plane tickets, gambling, etc... And I took a week off from school to do this and haven't been to classes since then; so I have 2 weeks to learn ordinary differential equations, statistics, computer algorithms, differential geometry, and the history of math. I don't have the notes for those classes since I was playing poker instead so there's a pretty high probability I'll fail some of those courses. Which would fuck up any chance of grad school since my average would be just slightly too low.

I take taxi cab rides for 100m instead of walking to get home faster to play poker. I usually foot a bigger percentage of the bill when I'm out with my student friends who don't have jobs.

Cap I didn't know stars had that option but honestly that hasn't helped me in the past. When I cashed out on stars before I went to Party and played there. After some tilt sessions there I excluded myself there as well as restricted my deposit limit. The next day I tried calling them to get my account re-activated it. They said they couldn't do anything about it: and that's how I now have a Fulltilt account. After a couple of days and a couple of tilt sessions I recashed into stars for the maximum you can with a credit card. After a couple of days there my exclusion on party was done. Basically, responsible gaming is bullshit. If you can't control your mentality you're fucked. This was all during last semester's exam period. There is something about the stress associated with exams that tilts me hard.

On a brighter note let me share some amusing stories from vegas.

1) I get into a friendly cab one day with my friend and the driver tells us to make sure that we had everything when we leave the car because a lot of people kept forgetting their cell phones in his car. I tip him like 10$ and we get out at the Tropicana Hotel which was only 5 minutes away from the Monte Carlo hotel. We're walking around and I feel my pockets since they feel a little lighter and I tell my friend, "fuck, I don't have my cell phone on me". I go to Tropicana reception to use their phones but they're bitches and won't let me call long distance. I go to a pay phone and call my cell phone and hear the following message, "Please insert 7.50$". Mother fucker, no one carries 30 quarters on them. Beat number 2.

I go up to this random couple and explain my situation; they let me use their cell phone. The nice cabbie driver then says, "it's going to cost you for my time. What do you think?" I reply "ok sure, how about 20$". He says "50$". I think fucking asshole in my head but agree nontheless. Beat number 3.

He drives up and has a smile on his face and says "I told you not to forget your cellphone". But he doesn't show the phone and asks for the money up front. I give him 20$ and say that 50$ is a lot of money. He tells me that if I have a problem I should just call his cab company and get the money back from them. This pisses me off so I tell him to "give me my fucking phone". Apparently angry asian guys as well as making a free 20$ is enough for this guy because he quickly hands over my phone.

2) I'm walking out of the Rio and the first cab that comes up drops off Tony "the mouth" G. I hate this guy but I still had to sit where his ass had just been.

3) Poker story: craziest hand I've ever seen live. I'm at the wynn where the buyin is uncapped and I'm watching Elky play a hand with Lamont Jordan (running back for the Jets) and this crazy maniac who's been playing for 2 days straight and is sitting with like 150k at 10/20.

So crazy maniac raises it up to 320$ (standard raise at this table), Elky casually tosses in 320$, and Lamont Jordan calls out of the small blind. Flop comes A95 with top two cards hearts. By the way Lamont Jordan is wearing a sleaveless shirt showing off his huge muscles and he's got a supermodel looking girlfriend sitting beside him. He's also watching replay videos of football games (probably of himself). Anyways Lamont checks, and the Maniac bets 720$, Elky mucks quickly, and Lamont minraises to 1440$. Maniac thinks for a bit, then makes the call. The turn is the two of hearts making 3 hearts on the board, Lamont thinks and checks. Maniac then casually tosses in a bet of 2.2K. Lamont thinks for a long time and makes the call. River is a King of hearts for a 4 flush and Lamont unconsciously shakes his head since he's obviously not happy with it. I'm not sure if the Maniac saw it since it looked like he was looking at his chips. Anyways Lamont checks, Maniac fires out 3.4K and Lamont folds after a long time and shows A9 for two pair. Maniac shows him 45 spades for a "you got pwned Lamont".

put notes on ur screen, somewhere close that u can see "one spew -> quit session" stuff like that, just focus on playing good, literally only on playing good, no matter if u get sucked out or not. Get rid of ANY emotions, just play logically.