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RiKD    United States. Apr 21 2018 04:35. Posts 4928
So, I just watched "Carmina Burana" to ballet and it was fucking brilliant. Between the Lebanese coffee and the show I am like pumped up. Oh man, "O Fortuna" is like overwhelming and there was a piece after the fall where there is a learned balance between the pitfalls of earthly pleasures and awareness that was so blissful. I had tears steaming down my face. The costumes were incredible as well as the lighting. You can't ignore the beauty and grace in the dancers. Such remarkable symmetry. But what do I want? I want to fuck a bad bitch like Kleio Valentine (NSFW).

Tinder and Snapchat is the new Liquidpoker and r/gonewild for me. It's just different things substituted. I smell some pussy and I am planning on which chelsea boots to buy, which leather jacket to buy, my next tattoo while forgetting I still live at home with my parents and have dental bills and yada yada yada. I have a date with a girl that we'll find out what she is actually going to look like when she shows up. She is pretty cool though so I figure we'll give it a shot. I have to get some more/(better) pics up on tinder. I would like a nice influx of matches always coming in. I don't want to get tinder plus until I have a better profile and some more experience under my belt. You see this? All the plans and fantasies. I'm a fucking maniac. I really should sit and breathe more. So, many people fucking say that. I guess I am a little restless at the moment. I want so bad to win at life and I have too many plans and fantasies and I don't even know what my priorities are. I know my first priority is I really can't drink alcohol or do drugs. Shit is fucked if I do. I think renunciation of the material is such a tricky one. It is like people in overeaters anonymous. A little different because I absolutely need to eat to survive but do I really need to go to the lengths of buddhist monk and completely abstain from the material? The other end is broke me in dope outfits.

So, I RSVP'd to my friend's wedding and tried on my suit. It's tight! Tight as in too tight and barely fits. So, I think it is time to burn some fat. I am not quite where I would like to be in the muscle aspect but I think it is more important to burn fat at this point. That means less food and more cardio.

Some topics in here for sure. I just needed to get some stuff out of my brain. What do I really want? AA tells me peace and serenity. I think that is about right.

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SleepyHead   . Apr 21 2018 05:20. Posts 857

You smell some pussy lol you are a fucking maniac my friend

Dude you some social darwinist ideas that they are giving hitlers ghost a boner - Baal 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Apr 21 2018 05:44. Posts 14508

Buy Tinder+
why waste your time with limited matches
Once your profile is good enough you won't need it in the first place

NL5 Grinder 4Life 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Apr 21 2018 06:29. Posts 14508

Also maybe less drugs would be nice you sound shitfaced

NL5 Grinder 4Life 

RiKD    United States. Apr 21 2018 14:39. Posts 4928

I guess it is always a good idea to have an influx of matches and dates. I never want to fixate on one girl (unless we are boyfriend and girlfriend). Unless I go on a photo shoot it takes time to develop a rockin’ profile. I was never a guy to get my photo taken and most of the time recently there has not been a lot of excitement and adventure which tinder is sort of all about. I’m looking to remedy this. The goal would be a bunch of matches and say 2 dates a week.

Also, I was perhaps shitfaced off of Carmine Burana and ballet. I don’t drink or do drugs. I deal with anxiety and bipolar and maybe I am a bit on the manic side. I typically write pretty manic anyways.


Santafairy   Korea (South). Apr 21 2018 18:21. Posts 1291

if you have a subscription to going outside you can talk to limitless matches for free

It seems to be not very profitable in the long run to play those kind of hands. - Gus Hansen 

RiKD    United States. Apr 21 2018 23:47. Posts 4928

haha, oh, here we go.

I think you need a pretty good read on the kind of eye contact you are getting to even begin to think about approaching random women outside. It depends so much on the context. Bars and clubs where they are wearing makeup and dressed up to look sexy is one thing. A women looking like she is in a rush at Whole Foods is another matter all together.

I don't drink or do drugs so I don't go to bars and clubs anymore. I am actually curious to what some of your suggestions would be?


napalm   Poland. Apr 22 2018 09:37. Posts 152

If your thoughts were creating the apparent reality then your posts would be a pretty good indicator of what kind of reality you're creating for yourself.


LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Apr 22 2018 09:59. Posts 14508

If you have a HD phone/camera you can take a video and then pick the best frame
and download Pixlr, it's a very basic photo editor.

And you don't have to drink to go to bars heh
I used to do this exercise where I'd just go to a club at like 11pm (the club with bars also where you can talk to people) and just approach 10 people and then go home, have it as practice, if you get numbers, also great.

And try meetup.com for various groups and go to a bunch of random stuff
TBH I still do that and I've had a girlfriend for years

NL5 Grinder 4Life 

RiKD    United States. Apr 22 2018 15:28. Posts 4928

Did you get your girlfriend from tinder?

I think I will pass on that exercise. I am not saying it is a bad exercise I just need a better reason to be in bars and clubs.

I think I am one good headshot and some decent shots in some nice outfits away from a really nice profile. It is so hard to just get that done though. I heard that there is like an internal desirability score depending on who is swiping right or left and it matters to which profiles you see. I need to get that desirability score up and just have a more attractive profile in general. It wastes time not getting matches I am attracted to.


RiKD    United States. Apr 22 2018 22:08. Posts 4928

So, I asked this girl out to ice cream in the afternoon (we were talking about it earlier in the convo). She says she works and is free in the evening. There is this bomb ass thai place across the street from the ice cream place. I don't know if I want to just go straight into dinner on a first date though. I was thinking more have some ice cream and walk around the city.


Floofy   Canada. Apr 23 2018 05:07. Posts 8662


  On April 22 2018 21:08 RiKD wrote:
So, I asked this girl out to ice cream in the afternoon (we were talking about it earlier in the convo). She says she works and is free in the evening. There is this bomb ass thai place across the street from the ice cream place. I don't know if I want to just go straight into dinner on a first date though. I was thinking more have some ice cream and walk around the city.



My opinion about diner on a first date is:

1: If you don't pay, you will seem cheap to a lot of girls
2: If you do pay, you end up spending a lot of money for something that often leads nowhere (in my case thats 70%+)
3: Its hard to initiate kino in this setting (totally possible, i once started kissing a lot with a girl on first diner date, but that happened once).

I think ice cream is a better idea.

james9994: make note dont play against floofy, ;( 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Apr 23 2018 12:28. Posts 14508

First date always easy escape plan from online
so you are both comfortable
ice cream sounds good
and you can have backup plans for different places if things do go well

NL5 Grinder 4Life 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Apr 23 2018 12:29. Posts 14508

And no I got my GF at a party with poker guys Marshall28 from here took me to haha
But I did go on a bunch of online dates too

NL5 Grinder 4Life 

RiKD    United States. Apr 23 2018 15:50. Posts 4928


  On April 23 2018 04:07 Floofy wrote:
Show nested quote +



My opinion about diner on a first date is:

1: If you don't pay, you will seem cheap to a lot of girls
2: If you do pay, you end up spending a lot of money for something that often leads nowhere (in my case thats 70%+)
3: Its hard to initiate kino in this setting (totally possible, i once started kissing a lot with a girl on first diner date, but that happened once).

I think ice cream is a better idea.


If you don't pay you are cheap.

It was nice when I could go out for a $100 meal and not even care or notice. The Thai place would probably end up being about $70 which I really want to be able to say what's the difference but that's not the case for me at the moment. I think that is a part to this whole thing. How do I get back to a place where $100 meals don't matter but my soul is not suffering for it? I think we have discussed this before but in my opinion the perfect first date is at a cool, sexy lounge. I no longer have the money for that and I don't drink. I was talking to this one girl about drinks and was just honest and said I'll have a san pelligrino or a cappucino and I didn't know anything about where to get a drink in this city and she was like "lol, we don't have to get drinks." I have always found it works a lot better to just say a place and a time. Let's go to (coffee place) at 2pm on Sunday. I think that is what the woman wants. I just figured it would be an experiment on going out for drinks. I really wouldn't mind having a san pelligrino or a cappucino but maybe she would.

You and your kino. I have had dates where I initiated zero kino (unless eye contact is considered kino) until I got her home and pushed her up against the door and kissed her. I don't think it's that big of a deal. Kissing in public is not a great look. That's not my goal. My goal is to fuck her in my bed or her bed or on the counter or the couch, etc.

I think ice cream is the better idea as well. I asked her to dinner then ice cream then revised and said "or, we can get some ice cream and go for a bit of a walk?" It feels kind of weak to re-ask like that but I think it makes her more comfortable. My goal is not actually to go to dinner I just thought it was kind of a cool idea. I really want to just get the ice cream and go for a walk so I need to stick to my guns and ask for what I want.


Floofy   Canada. Apr 23 2018 23:06. Posts 8662

I don't care if it makes me "cheap", if i paid 100$ for every first dates i'd be broke as fuck lol
I rather keep my money for girls i actually have sex with.

james9994: make note dont play against floofy, ;( 

punix   Germany. Apr 24 2018 06:40. Posts 406

grow some balls and more important f***ing grow up.. you sound like a 12-year-old crying for attention from girls


Stroggoz   New Zealand. Apr 24 2018 11:29. Posts 4018

your blog seriously tilts me. You seem very materialistic (or used to be?) and narcissistic. It also tilts me that you float the idea of Buddhism but then go back to talk about expensive dinners and chasing girls. It's like you never take a serious stance on anything, and are basically uninterested in engaging with reality

I was GTO in 2007 -wobbly_au 

Loco   Canada. Apr 24 2018 14:57. Posts 19232


  On April 24 2018 10:29 Stroggoz wrote:
your blog seriously tilts me. You seem very materialistic (or used to be?) and narcissistic. It also tilts me that you float the idea of Buddhism but then go back to talk about expensive dinners and chasing girls. It's like you never take a serious stance on anything, and are basically uninterested in engaging with reality



He is an addict and mentally ill (bipolar/psychotic). It's not from a lack of interest. It's how he is. It's an incapacity. The thing is, blaming people for how they're "wired" in a vacuum like this is no good. Mental illness, materialism, narcissism, they all have systemic roots. This is what you expect this system to generate, being degenerate itself, it produces degenerates. This forum is full of degenerates of all sorts, RiKD only stands out because he is addicted to being public about his struggles and obsessions. Poker itself is a degenerative game, it's purely exploitative.

It only tilts you because you're being too self-centered yourself, not taking the time to reflect about how it is possible for someone to become this way. It's not causa sui, at no point did RiKD sign up to become an addict or Mortensen a delusional conspiracy theorist. It's much more an indictment of the neoliberal economic machine and the reductionist paradigm that produces such deficient, confused and unbalanced people than it is anything like the lack of individual awareness and willpower to make things better.

For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong. (Mencken)Last edit: 24/04/2018 15:00

Stroggoz   New Zealand. Apr 24 2018 15:38. Posts 4018

i agree that the neoliberal system is a great contributer in producing these types of people and a variety of mentally/physically ill people in general. Not sure why you'd think I don't agree with you on that point.

I was GTO in 2007 -wobbly_auLast edit: 24/04/2018 15:44

 
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