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this bar we went to had this snow bar mat thing to put drinks on.

naturally...



sicklife


Comments (4)

so its like 2am

everyone goes home from the city

im like NAH WAY SON and trot off to the casino for some live 2/5 NL

I im up like $60 or something after i pick up JJ and bet a safe flop and my opponent folds

then i get 87s on the button i think, so i raise it up and get 1 call im like SWEET

flop T62r

FUCKING SWEET I GOT A GUTSHOT I BET $35

he raises to $70

i call

turn is fuck all

he bets $85 or some shit and i call

then river is a fucking brick and i check and he bets all in - you stupid fat cunt i hope you die.

Then i pick up KK later on

Its raised to $20 PF with like 4 callers, i have like $108 so naturally i raise to $80 LOL leaving me $28 behind

2 callers

KQJr flop i push for $28

2 calls including fat cunt.

turn 9 UAIHSFJK:Wf WHY DONT I JUST FUCKING MUCK PF AND WALK OFF

river 6 or some bullshit

he turns QT for the straight

HOPE YOU CRASH ON YOUR WAY HOME CUNT

FUCKIN RIGGED

I LEAVE

I AM POOR


Comments (5)

as you know i get mad crazy chicks

remember that one who i asked for text advice off, well she was at party tonight and she told her bet friend she wants to jump me - shes pretty hammered but ill allow it for this one time YUP YUP YUP YUPPPPPPPPPPP

only problem is im getting cock blocked by my flatmate who despite telling to me to find another girl to fuck obviously got mad jealous when she saw us together and she kept interupting and now im stuck in the middle of a sweet fuckin dilema

we all going into the city in a couple of hours to continue drinking. Lets pull the fuckin stops out

fuck it im gonna go for gold

CLICK CLICK BOOYA

MY ROLL SHIT BE UP TO PAR


Comments (4)

1: fall over when youre drunk and cut your hand so it looks like a vagina. Draw on the naughty bits



2: Practise your technique. *mmmm-alulululul!*



I really need to get a job...


Comments (12)

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Comments (9)

i lol'd at this plate of the car parked infront of me.




Comments (3)

lets all be supportive.
they all laughed at michael jordan when he tried to become a baseball player after retiring from basketball - dont let the haters get you down Tom! I BELIEVE IN YOUR TALENT!



The first local competition he entered. Despite the small field of 3 people Tom managed to take home bronze. Well done tom.


He decided he needed something to give him an edge. He managed to pick up these - they were on sale, reduced to clear.



The results speak for themselves.




Comments (9)

So i went shopping today.

Picked up 4 shirts at spencers.

Got a nice new pair of sunglasses (can probably even get a writeoff on them for playing poker lolll):



and, my most prized purchase of the day......




woohooo. going to be practicing bowling and tennis along with destroying the zelda game. gg to everyone's wii prop betting career


Comments (6)

So i went shopping today.

Picked up 4 shirts at spencers.

Got a nice new pair of sunglasses (can probably even get a writeoff on them for playing poker lolll):



and, my most prized purchase of the day......




woohooo. going to be practicing bowling and tennis along with destroying the zelda game. gg to everyone's wii prop betting career


Comments (6)

Dunno what happened really but I finally got pokertracker to work again. Havent played a whole lot since my pwnage session but Im doing well on 3/6 so far and I stand firm in my decision to only grind 3/6 for a couple of months.

I played all the big sundays yesterday, got like 3 hours deep in the million when i reshoved on some dude with A9s he snapped with KK and byebye. Tournaments are such a waste of time, and yet i insist to play in them T_T. Im probably going to play in most of the wcoop evens though since they are so baller. I dont have enough money on stars but Im planning on grinding a donkament roll there playing 1/2 6-max and hu for funaments. I might even make a video or something, we will see.

Im also kinda thinking of starting to give private lessons. I just havent decided if I really want to, what price i should set and if I will have time to do it at all. I will have to meditate on that.


Here are my august results, kinda disapointing. If i had only learned to stay away from 5/10 and not playing like a retard it would have been a good month.




smokey!


Comments (4)

The following events are true.

Some other great quotes:

"You are like a bear, you marry female bear"
and
"You like a white pig - you white and fat"



Last night i discovered her kryptonite when it came to turning her on so shes got no chance at resisting my charms.


Comments (18)

I want my well deserved green star.


I want baal to be banned.


If these two arent fullfilled I will leave lp forever.


Your move nazgul.


Oh, and this song fucking rules!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rIlCcU5FmfE


yes im a sissy, deal with it.


Comments (13)

i just got home from thorladen's house. was really great seeing people play and talking this over.

anyway, i got my desktop up and running so im available for lessons. gave a short one to pooruser last night and I think it went fairly well.

sign up through the lessons thinger up top yo


Comments (3)

i just got home from thorladen's house. was really great seeing people play and talking this over.

anyway, i got my desktop up and running so im available for lessons. gave a short one to pooruser last night and I think it went fairly well.

sign up through the lessons thinger up top yo


Comments (3)

This is how things should look at the end of every session eh? I just went through the sickest heater of my life. I was playing a bunch of drunk retards and man did i hit hands. I flopped sets in reraised pots, caught flushes and just bulldozed completely. It litteraly felt as if people where coming up to me, bowing and humbly giving me all their money. Jesus probably do love me.

My pokertracker crashed about 2 min ago so I have no idea at what bb/100 i was running but I ended up about +8k over maybe 2k hands. Some dude even accused me of cheating because "nobody can be THAT lucky"


lol


Once again, my bulldozing just barely made up for my losses on 5/10 and this just enforces a though thats been lingering in my mind for a couple of days. I have decided I will not leave 3/6 for a good amount of time. Im going back to school and wont have time to play as much so I really need a steady income. 8 tabling 3/6 I can easily make as much as i made playing 5/10, and without the ridicilous swings. I just wanna grind up a huge roll to buy myself an appartment +invest in stock n shit.

Oh, and im too lazy to edit out my screenname on the print screen. w/e, dont tell anyone.


wwjd?


Comments (18)

Helping build a safer community



and one for your blogs:




Comments (6)

If i put this onto t-shirts would you guys buy them?

Possible nike lawsuit but it would be worth it.




Comments (29)

Uhhhhh this fucking blows. I suck at poker and ive been getting so pwnd on 5/10. Its gone so far im forced to move down to 3/6 again. I have probably been doing some stupid bluffs and shit but Im definitely running really bad aswell.

Here are the biggest losers from my 1k hand session today where i dropped 9k.

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247220

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247221

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247227

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247229

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247230

http://www.liquidpoker.net/h/247233

I dont think I won one pot over 200$


Poker is brutal kids, get out while you can.


Comments (4)

court is so fucking lol

i was the best dressed person in the building (as usual)

I walk through the door and this rough lookin guy who smelt of fags waited for me to walk through - i just let the door close behind me rather than hold it open for him.

he goes

"THANKS..." stood about 6inches from a closed door.

If you got door problems i feel bad for you son, i got 99 problems but a door aint one.

Anyway this incident kept me amused and i sat outside courtroom 2 waiting for my name to be called. I started to get worried coz i had no idea which courtroom i was menna be waiting outside of but thought id just gamble and leave it up to chance.

Since i run so good, obv. i was outside the right courtroom. Get my name called and they offer me diversion. which means i get no conviction if i comply with some po-po stuff.

I look at my charges and theyre trying to pin me for 3 months in prison and a $2500 fine - bit heavy handed that one.

Go into an office with 5-0 and they ask me about that night etc.

I told him i was still studying accounting (which obv. is a lie since ive dropped out coz im a bum) - but my chances of getting off lightly were better if i didnt say i was an unemployed degenerate gambler with a borderline drinking problem.

I see some photos of my damage and some other stuff.

Once again, i run so good that none of the glass panels broke so it was just a case of putting them back into place.

$200 fine and letter of appology to the bus stop company.

sweet suckout.


Comments (11)

First order of business, some rare poker news.

Brag: rolled for nl25
Beat: taken me far too long to hold on to a bankroll
Variance: 5 hours of playing on the final run

So now i can really start ballin' wit all kinds of mad shit.

things to do:
- buy pokertracker
- learn how to use it
- ball out

---------

The post-session dreams i had:

I had a dream which involved JonnyCosMo. Hed told me he had been on a website about photoshopping and it had suggested he emailed me for help or another guy called Anonagram.

I went and found this Anonagram and he was in this mad cult. We were all in a field and Anonagram got kicked out the cult coz he didnt have a dad. I was against cults and soon the leader started fighting me.

I run off

Cut scene then and its me and CosMo playing basketball (I swear this is true) against the cult.

Cosmo was pretty good i can remember he scored at least 6 points, meanwhile id only managed a lay-up for 2. They deffinatly had more players than us though.

I also had a dream about Werzal Gummage looking down at me from a hole in the ceiling



He looked way scarier though. It was really wierd coz i completely froze when i saw him with fingers in my mouth clenching down on them.

------


a picture of me, chairhattin'.

I was kind of shy about posting a picture of myself but then i thought it cant be any worse than milkmans


It fitted gooooood


Comments (6)