Tilt circle starting again?.....by ConquistadoR, January 05
Yeehaw, the old tiltmonkey in me is back. And it feels like I cant beat him.... everytime I make a decision he already pressed on the wrong button. The funny thing is, I can play concentrated for days, and make the right moves, but the tiltmonkey can destroy everything in just a few MINUTES. I cant put my anger towards myself in words right now. I played so fucking much today and could have ended up ALOT in the greens, I even could have turned the bad month into a winning one, because at one time I really won a lot in a very short time. But instead of keeping it, I slowly tilt it away first... and then I tilt it away like a fcking retard fuckhead and make this an actual losing day. Within 20 minutes i lost all, twice.
AWEJFPIAJWEFIOJAWEIPFJAWIPEJFIAWEFJIAWJEIFJ I really wanna smash something. Why cant I beat the monkey tilt fucker in me? My winrate sucks dick now as well since this whole month is a losing one. God damnit I could have it all so nice. Now everytime I play I will think of what I already could have achieved and shit but I know that I should only think of playing the best right NOW. But my mind is fucking me up, telling me I could already have had a lot more money and this makes me so angry that it leads to more bad play.
Now i dont know what to do, I have the fear that my old circle of life poker tilt will start again.
FUCCCCCCCCCCCCCK.
What do you guys do in my situation?
I'd like to buy about 10 million play chips on pokerstars. PM me with price and I'll tell you how many I want to buy. Lower price = buy more I guess... thanks
Played another session on NL10. I think i did not so well today.
I butchered some crucial hands and i really need to improve that.
Below i will state what i mean with that:
just summing up what i've been doing since my last update... kinda longish, i tried to throw in some pictures to make it interesting
cliffnotes is i played 140k hands in december 24 tabling mostly NL100, made 4k in winnings and 4k in rakeback/bonuses in december, got through the biggest downswing of my life so far, finished up about 30k including rb/bonuses in 2008, and i need to trade 4k stars for 4k ftp pm me if u can help! thx
my goal for december was to hit the 200k VPP milestone bonus, partly for the money and partly to motivate myself to play every day to hit a target. i 24 tabled for the entire month which makes it a bit harder to play my A game but i don't mind it.
the month didn't start too well... in the last few days of november i hit a doomswitch and it continued into the early days of december too. i was getting scared because my recent plan was to cash out my money up to a certain point (~30 buyins) at the end of each month and so i had cashed out a couple of thousand at the end of november. all full ring.
my roll dropped down to about 20 buyins in the first week. the point that i got really pissed off was when suddenly my auto reloader stopped working and i realised i was starting to go busto
so i deposited another 2k that i'd cashed out previously, it felt dirty but i didn't want to have to move down if possible... anyway after a while i realised it wasn't a smart idea to keep playing 1/2 because every man and his dog was playing there, and the tables were rediculously regfested. coupled with running bad and confidence being low, wasn't a good idea. meanwhile, the nl100 tables were still largely a fish fest and the regs fold their blinds 90%+ there so in the end it was an easy decision. it did mean id have to play more hands for VPPs though. so i battled it out at nl100 instead and managed to get some results there and also make my milestone, just in time too before i had to go for NYE. and it felt so good to finally end my extremely long breakeven stretch.
lately i've been trying to learn how to play razz, i even purchased PT Stud, but so far i've dropped $50 there and i feel like a fish... i'll probaly stick at it when i'm not in the mood for normal hold em, and hopefully one day i'll be good enough to make a profit at the 30/60 games.
in australia, i am still on uni break until march, but current plan is to gym and play some poker for the next few weeks, then work at my local government's engineering department in my home town for the rest of it. in december i've worked out i've made about $100(AUD)/hr including playing nl100 because of the exchange rate and rakeback/bonus... the job will pay about $16/hr
so moneywise, its not such a great decision but i am still looking forward to going back to work as i get on well with the guys who work there, including my boss and it's pretty laid back. and it'll be good to have a spell of "normal" work, as awesome as poker is sometimes i miss the cups of tea/coffee at morning tea, office politics, having drinks with co-workers and so on.
til then, going to try and go to the gym at least once every two days, eat healthy and attempt to cook sweet and sour pork at least once. im not asian but i love asian food (mostly chinese, but havent really tried others, let me know if there is something i am missing out on).
Final note: I am looking to move approx. $4,000 from pokerstars to http://img.alibaba.com/photo/11743727/Full_Tilt_Poker_Logo_s_Poker_Patch.jpg. I've never done a trade before for anything above $20, but i would really appreciate if someone could help me trade this money. PM me if you might be able to help, and/or need money moved from FTP to stars, i can send first etc. Cheers =)
Hero: bets $12
bill227: raises $13 to $25
Hero: raises $18 to $43 and is all-in
bill227: calls $17.50 and is all-in
Uncalled bet ($0.50) returned to Hero
Showdown Hero: shows (two pair, Aces and Kings)
bill227: shows (three of a kind, Kings)
bill227 collected $99.25 from pot
Summary Total pot $102.25 | Rake $3
Board
Seat 1: bill227 showed and won ($99.25) with three of a kind, Kings
Seat 2: sinfest folded before Flop (didnt bet)
Seat 3: s0stndrd folded before Flop
Seat 4: DeDikzak (button) folded before Flop
Seat 5: Ti3Go (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 6: Hero (big blind) showed and lost with two pair, Aces and Kings
next one: "i called pf because i saw you how you donked off w AA before" o rly? gtfo retard, and plz die + Show Spoiler +
Submitted by : Ezekiell
PokerStars Game #23592521383: Holdem No Limit ($0.25/$0.50) - 2009/01/05 4:56:05 PT [2009/01/05 7:56:05 ET]
Table Tynka 6-max Seat #6 is the button
Seat 1: bill227 ($96.70 in chips)
Seat 2: sinfest ($87.90 in chips)
Seat 3: s0stndrd ($52.10 in chips)
Seat 4: colinas101 ($21.95 in chips)
Seat 5: Ti3Go ($51.95 in chips)
Seat 6: Hero ($50 in chips)
bill227: posts small blind $0.25
sinfest: posts big blind $0.50
Holecards(Odds) Dealt to Hero
s0stndrd: raises $1 to $1.50
colinas101: folds
Ti3Go: folds
Hero: raises $4.50 to $6
bill227: folds
sinfest: folds
s0stndrd: calls $4.50
s0stndrd: checks
Hero: bets $22
s0stndrd: raises $15.10 to $37.10 and is all-in
Hero: calls $13 and is all-in
Uncalled bet ($2.10) returned to s0stndrd
River (Pot : $100.75)
Showdown s0stndrd: shows (three of a kind, Fours)
Hero: mucks hand
s0stndrd collected $97.75 from pot
Summary Total pot $100.75 | Rake $3
Board
Seat 1: bill227 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 2: sinfest (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 3: s0stndrd showed and won ($97.75) with three of a kind, Fours
Seat 4: colinas101 folded before Flop (didnt bet)
Seat 5: Ti3Go folded before Flop (didnt bet)
Seat 6: Hero (button) mucked
the VERY FUCKING NEXT hand, obv im lifetilted from that dickhead + Show Spoiler +
Submitted by : Ezekiell
PokerStars Game #23592489002: Holdem No Limit ($0.25/$0.50) - 2009/01/05 4:54:00 PT [2009/01/05 7:54:00 ET]
Table Milet 6-max Seat #2 is the button
Seat 1: connery70 ($32.80 in chips)
Seat 2: Hero ($50 in chips)
Seat 3: rvb80 ($66.85 in chips)
Seat 4: elbows74 ($54.75 in chips)
Seat 6: dryath ($58.35 in chips)
rvb80: posts small blind $0.25
elbows74: posts big blind $0.50
Holecards(Odds) Dealt to Hero
dryath: folds
connery70: raises $0.50 to $1
Hero: calls $1
rvb80: folds
elbows74: folds
connery70: checks
Hero: bets $25
connery70: calls $24.80 and is all-in
Uncalled bet ($0.20) returned to Hero
Showdown Hero: shows (a straight, Seven to Jack)
connery70: shows (a straight, Nine to King)
connery70 collected $64.35 from pot
Summary Total pot $66.35 | Rake $2
Board
Seat 1: connery70 showed and won ($64.35) with a straight, Nine to King
Seat 2: Hero (button) showed and lost with a straight, Seven to Jack
Seat 3: rvb80 (small blind) folded before Flop
Seat 4: elbows74 (big blind) folded before Flop
Seat 6: dryath folded before Flop (didnt bet)
and a couple of 60-80bb pots: straight vs flush, set over set, QQ vs AK /obv AAx flop/, and a guy soulreaded me quite hard w a bluff
well shit happens, time to go back, rebuild, and try again! i swear i'll be a NL200 regular this year!
oh and btw: does /did/ anyone from you microstakes grinders have a coach? i'm thinking about getting one, and i'd like to hear your experiences!
Last 3 days. Ugh 1st downswing was running bad, spewed a bit too of course. I gathered myself, de-tilted, and played another session.. Coincidentally all of my 6max tables broke and I played HU on 3 tables. That's the big upswing, made a couple of hands and played well imo.
Uh, I took a break after that and then logged back on. I immediately ran like total shit and re-tilted. Took myself a while before I said enough is enough and logged off of that one. End 2nd big downswing.
Whined a bit to sennpu on aim. Re-un-tiltarded myself and grinded for a couple of hours. Stopped after a while due to hunger pains lol.
Not sure if I should get some sleep or just try to grind through the whole day.
Started the new year with a 50nl shot... running in annoying amount of coolers and 2-6 outers and 80%-20% for me feels like 10%-90% for the villain.Im still playing TAG want to win some buy ins and establish some self-confidence so i can start exploiting most of the regulars on 100% and 3bet em light and basically do some moves i havent tried before.Im not sure if 50nl is the best limit to start learning this but its either 50nl or 100nl.Here s the graph :
Well, the most of the event im somewhat indifferent to, so straight to the title matches.
My prediction was Misaki loss to Siyar and Gomi barely taking it from Kitaoka, with the possibility of him losing as well.
Why, u crazy Pride nuthugger? you will ask. Well, because Misaki is the dying breed of rounded, but not well fighters. He's Wanderlei, he's Nog, he's Crocop. Solid striking, but no evasiveness no head movement, not even keeping his hands up. Semi-suspect chin, somewhat compensated by quick recovery times(exactly like post-pride Nog, mind you), and just basic knowledge of ground defense.
Gomi looked Crocoped. No not LHKed, he looked like post Pride Crocop, nervous, unmotivated, you could see him doubting himself. And sadly there is reasons to doubt. Like all those guys I listed above Gomi is the dying breed of MMA fighters. Fighters that did well because at the time they were more rounded then the others, and having one solid advantage(heavy hands and good chin in gomis case) they just never felt the need to progress. That doesnt mean that you should count Gomi out of any match up, his power is certainly a threat to just about any striker, however thats all he seems to have left working for himself- a puncher's chance. And that is a damn shame, because Gomi-Penn 2, if it is ever to happen, will mean as much as Lidell vs Silva, epic match up, way past due.
Kitaoka looked very very high.
Crocop retirement will perhaps be the first of many too come. Lets hope he "Manhoefs" it tho and comes back strong.
So after my last doomcrying and very emo blogpost people really got to me and I think the best to thing out of this major ass-raping streak is improvement. As Vlseph (sorry if I screwed up your name there...) suggested I am hereby posting my stats of the last 7.5k hands and I immediatly noticed that my W$WSF is pretty low and my W$SD% is also signicifanctly lower than over my overall database. Not really sure why but I guess I might have been somewhat spewy on turns and/or rivers judging from my W$SD% and my lowered W$WSF could very well be lower because I am too nitty as of late because of my lack of confidence. I generally give people a lot of credit lately when they play back at me and whenever I do decide not to make the agonizing fold because I feel like I am walked all over, I call down/get the money or whatever and they either have it after all or they suckout with me winning a 70/30 or whatever standardish.
The 50NL losses is very easily explained. It's a very short sample at the start of the downswing when I was trying out some 50NL and the following hand occured:
I think I'll really give my game some extra though and probably go over all the 30BB+ losers of those last 7.5k hands. There is no doubt about it, I've been running like crap but there is always room for improvement and I guess that's the best I can get out of this shithole. Trying to improve as much as I can and wait for a better run. Anyways, I hope some people here can give me some solid and helping criticism on my play and I will probably post any noticable hand later when I got around to looking through all of them.
Managed to put in almost 3k hands so far, not that much but things go kinda slow when your 2 tabling HU. Im clearly not playing awesome and im probably about a breakeven player, but im definatly running worse than im playing.
Gotta work on losening up more OTB, plus i gotta manage to play those small limped pots oop alot better. Im bleeding of money there.
Few of the hands that have gone all-in that i can thank for my awesome graph:
Submitted by : AcroN
***** Hand History for Game 1357441850 *****
$50.00 USD NL Texas Hold'em - Sunday, January 04, 05:39:42 ET 2009
Table Varde Heads Up Real Money
Seat 3 is the button
Seat 3: Apachai $77.27 USD
Seat 8: hamdi4711 $124.03 USD
Apachai posts small blind [$0.25 USD].
hamdi4711 posts big blind [$0.50 USD].
hamdi4711 bets [$22.00 USD]
Apachai calls [$20.77 USD]
hamdi4711 wins $154.77 USD from main pot
hamdi4711 shows
Submitted by : AcroN
***** Hand History for Game 1357401141 *****
$50.00 USD NL Texas Hold'em - Sunday, January 04, 05:17:14 ET 2009
Table Varde Heads Up Real Money
Seat 3 is the button
Seat 3: Hero $153.45 USD
Seat 8: hamdi4711 $52.85 USD
Hero posts small blind [$0.25 USD].
hamdi4711 posts big blind [$0.50 USD].
hamdi4711 wins $104.70 USD from main pot
hamdi4711 shows
Submitted by : AcroN
***** Hand History for Game 23523689939 *****
$50.00 USD NL Texas Hold'em - Saturday, January 03, 08:35:25 ET 2009
Table Algedi V Real Money
Seat 1 is the button
Seat 1: Hero $97.50 USD
Seat 2: kamellone $58.85 USD
Hero posts small blind [$0.25 USD].
kamellone posts big blind [$0.50 USD].
Well, I have been extremely lacking in my commitment to this blog so I figured now was a good time to make another post. December was a good start for me to get back into back after a long break. Managed to grind a $485 bankroll into just under $6k in the month. Looking back there was some ups and downs, and a hell of a lot of grinding but the thing I am most proud of is my commitment to becoming a better player and my continued love for the game.
Well here is the graph (Sorry for the lack of paint expertise :S)
i am moving down to NL50, and i think it is time for me to get a coach. i am just not playing well, and i feel like i need help because i am epicly failing hard. i am finishing a 10+BI downswing @ NL100 where i feel like i just bleed money so much. if anyone is interested, plz send me what ur rates are or profit sharing, and maybe we could make this a semi-long term thing.
My first hand on Hold’em Manager is dated September 15th, though it’d be unfair to say I started playing at that time. I’ve played for cash since about March, though I’d logged less than 2000 hands for sure, and mostly played SnGs. I was a break-even/slightly winning player from that time to around October/November, and I’m not going to lie.
The poker playing community is generally quite deluded. It’s how the economy works. Basically I luckboxed two tournaments, got a roll, didn’t get into many downswings early in my career, and managed to survive until eventually I became a winning player. Not a good player, mind you, but a winning one.
It was around September that my site got logged into by some friend’s friend, and had half my roll stolen, that sucked but the deposit bonus sort of helped me survive. I had a small but consistent winrate at SnGs, and I multi tabled $5.5 regular 9s.
October was sort of a gray area. I won a lot, but also experienced one of the biggest downswings ever, which was worth more than 600 dollars. On hindsight, I was on a huge upswing and got hit by a minor downswing. I was a pretty bad player at that time. I started playing 6Max Turbos.
November. I was still a pretty bad player, but I managed to not be as bad as the other players. I donked money off very often, but not as often as people donked money off to me. I made around 1k that month, mostly from 6max Turbo SnGs, but almost half of it from short stacking full ring. I was break even/slight winner at 6Max, but I did manage to get Platinum Star.
December. This month. I’m still a terrible player, but I get so lucky. I ran 400 dollars above EV for the first 10 days...
I was on an 18 buyin downswing at SnGs, and have never recovered, and in fact, could not be bothered to try.
My stats changed a lot since October. I became much more of a nit, on one hand, playing as tight as 17/14 in some sessions. For the first time, I started 24 tabling 6Max profitably around late October, though I usually stay at around 16 nowadays. I began 3betting a lot more often, and very profitably. At one point my 3bet was 7.4% over a 12k sample size, but have receded since then.
My AF dropped a lot, also. My WWSF is now 45%. Although my W$SD is a mediocre 50% it is, in context of a 31% WTSD, something I’m quite happy with. Through December, my bb/100 is averaging at 16.88, showing that I have learnt to station/spew quite profitably, resulting in a red line I am very proud of:
Finally, I have moved to 50NL. I have been rolled for it since October, but have never succeeded, being a bankroll nit. I tried on the 29th and 30th, losing 2 buyins in the process due to usual variance and some tilt.
Multi Table Effectively
Volume
Consistent 1k Months
Consistent Cash Game Results
NSD Winnings
Platinum Star
Move to 50NL (sorta… 4k~ hands a bit thin).
2009 Goals:
More Volume
Be [More] Profitable at Heads Up
1.5k Months
100NL by April/May
Supernova by June
2k Months by June
4K Bonus
Milestone by End of Year
30K Bankroll
Not Fail College
I am really tired but happy to be home again! I have been on a long trip, first to Malmö to celebrate christmas and then to Sälen for a week of skiing. It has been two amazing weeks with lots of relaxing and fun!
I didnt belive it pre-trip but I have actually played some poker. Not online which is a pitty but against friends and relatives. Mostly we played who would buy the hot chokolate the next day in the ski slope or like 20SEK - and it has been lots of fun! Even if there was some hugh differences in skill I made it fun for myself (and for them) by playing a solid LAG style of 90/80/4
Before I can start my new pokeryear I need to make a summary of the past year.
2008 started ok and I was up €10k the first 4 months or so. When the summer came many things went wrong, I had a dowswing so I did many other stuff instead of playing poker. But as usually I recovered and this autumn has been fine - I´m up more the $10k. Live I am also up like 50k SEK during the year (probably more but I am not that great at writing down my results).
As a total for the year I think I am up like 275k SEK ($35k) or something (maybe a bit more but I dont have all the numbers since I started with PT3 first in august). Even if I had higher expectations for the year I am ok with this since I havnt played that many hands and havnt made the big effort I need to really improve and become a great player.
My goals for 2009 is to become so much better then I am right now. I will watch CR movies, go through my PT database after every session and try and find my leaks. I also want to play higher then I do now - a goal could be to play like NL1000 at the end of the year.
But I actually only have one big concrete goal for 2009: I want to have $25k in my pokeraccount in May (I have about half right now) - then I will fullfill a dream and go to Las Vegas! After that I will take a year off from lawschool, play poker and maybe study some economy if I feel for it. Except from this I wont set up too many goals. These first months I will do my best in poker, study some, start to train and just wait until the summer comes - I hope it will be epic!
Good luck every one in 2009 and I hope to see some of you in Las Vegas this summer!!
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(three of a kind, Kings)
(three of a kind, Fours)
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