So, here it is. My biggest leak of all and I've been trying all kinds of stuff to get over it and I've gotten a little bit better at it but I still tilt way too hard. Fortunately enough I often am disciplined enough to almost insta-close session and try and cool off. But that doesn't really cut it. Before I close I often get a few hands in that I play tilted and at times this can become very costly which obviously hurts my winrate a shit-ton.
Now I was reading Myth's post the other day at Edzwoo's blog and he explained how a winrate can easily drop to a break-even/negative while you are more than capable enough to beat the stakes by little mistakes adding up and stuff. Now I only play 25NL and 50NL and I think this is my biggest problem. I am actually quite amazed how I can sustain a 3 ptbb/100 winrate with how hard I tilt at times even over a large sample size. This sample size even includes several occasions from about a 12-9 months ago where I didn't even have the discipline to close down my session and just started tilting away buy-ins and wouldn't stop before I lost like 2-4 buy-ins on top of what I was down.
Now I obviously know this is extremely bad, I am even ashamed of it a little but the only way to improve on things is by being honest to yourself and trying to improve instead of just acting like it never happened. Now I am just asking for advice around here how other people that may have had big tilt problems improved on discipline and maybe got a way off getting back into a relaxed but focused state of mind very quickly.
I think for people to hopefully give good advice, I should explain my tilt since I don't think it's completely the same as the regular tilt. The thing is, I don't tilt (much) when I get a bad beat. I know I got in the money good, I am annoyed that I lost, sure but I don't play any worse. I am able to go, whatever, got in good, percentages, long run, all will be good.
The times I tilt and when I tilt badly is because I didn't get my money in good. Even if it's at occasions where I post my hand, link it to people or whatever and they tell me it was a cooler. I am always wondering, could I have folded, did I make mistakes on previous streets maybe even. And then the moment I found out I made a mistake, I start tilting... BAD !! I am big perfectionist, always have been in other aspects of my life and this totally gets me going. I think of myself, that I am not allowed to be mistake. I ask myself to do everything I do in a (near)perfect way. Now you obviously know poker is a game without perfect information hence you will always make mistakes. After that, you can ask yourself the question if the mistake was avoidable or not. Often it is, sometimes, it wasn't.
This is the hardest part for me. I have an extremely hard time identifying the mistakes I couldn't have avoided. I'm pretty much very result oriented. Whenever I get my money in bad, I always think of myself as making a big mistake and start hating myself. I don't have the confidence to say, well, that was unlucky but I played it perfectly even though I got it in as a 30/70 dog this time.
I could ramble on and on about this but I guess this pretty much sums it up and so, I was wondering if anyone has any good and solid advice on this and maybe can help me out a little. From own experiences or whatever.
as for poker if u read my last blogpost ive receovered very nice today after yesterdays gayness, won 12 buy ins in 3000 hands today. This month has been crazy.. swingy as hell.
Anyway, heading to Vegas at the end of this week and starting to plan out the trip. I'm going broke man style, driving there and bringing a sleeping bag to do some couch surfing. Have a friends place to stay at first but I'm hopeful to find some LPer couch to crash on so I can be closer to the action. If you have a couch (or floor) available please let me know.
I'm driving out on the 3rd and planning to hit up Frinkx's house party on the 4th with the hope of meeting a bunch of LP guys at it. Then I'll stay for at least a few days and maybe a few weeks depending on how things go, and by that I mean if I run good or bad. If I run bad I'll have to make it a short trip. If I run well then I'll stick around longer.
I'm planning to just have fun with the fish @ the NL200 tables cause I don't have much live practice and no BR to play any of the tournaments. I figure there will be such juicy tables that I should be able to clean up if I don't run like shit. If I can run well @ NL200 and get to meet/hang out with a bunch of LP people I'll consider it a great trip.
PM me if you're gonna be in Vegas so we can meet up!
On another note, coaching is going well. I've got about 5 students that I'm working with and several more who have shown interest but haven't had time/money to start coaching yet. If you're looking for Low/Micro stakes coaching check out my post from before here. I enjoy it a lot and so far I think I've actually been able to help a few people quite a bit (or maybe that's all in my head, hehe). I'm definitely gonna keep coaching people for a while and I'm glad I decided to finally start doing this.
Well, no harm no foul. 1BI down which is great considering my present state of mind (The usual-paranoia, strong hand=ship it, doing stuff because I feel like it -.-)
And tell you what, it was fun, and the 1BI loss was offset by FPP exactly in its value. Ship the VPP, and next time I will start my brain before I start my sessions. Maybe.
Now its time to watch LESBIAN VAMPIRE KILLERS
:
Since I moved flats: (NL10+NL25 -I had higher win rate at NL25, NL10 really really hates me. I also played NL2 for 500 hands and ran really hot 80BB/100 there ;o)
The flat period where my red line starts to go up was my experimenting with Monkey Style which was very helpful for me. Had I not done that I would easily reach the 3-4bb/100, but it was great for my learning and it changed the way I play a lot. I now try to have the red line at least at 0 (the downward sloping curve at the beginning was my standard to date)
Ok guys, WSOP ME starts July 3rd, I'm going to see if I can sign up on the 4th for day 1 group b if possible
So far I've sold alot of %
Don't forget - 1% = 95$ (instant +ev since I am ITM over 10% itlr on OPR and top 50 on the TLB - was #30 this morning but missed the sundays due to a ton of grinding / learning this weekend with the boys
Woodbrave - 20% - confirmed
Anonomyous - 20% - doesn't want this posted for some reason - confirmed
You'llCallme - 2-5% - confirmed
NeillyAA (Me) - 10-35% depending on how much I sell - confirmed
nickson - 1% - confirmed
kapol - 1% - confirmed
hneves182 - 1% - confirmed
quocy04 - 2% - confirmed
omnipotent-king - 1-5% confirmed
Faith - 5% - not confirmed
F4Zi - 5% - confirmed
Also, at 95k VPP and close to Supernova, can't wait!
I have big plans for whoring the $1,500 bonuses.
Does anyone know how many hours a week it will take at NL50 to make 100k FPP w/ Supernova status?
lol fuck why does a day only have 24h
Thats not enought to do all the things i have to do
I didnt even manage to play any poker at all the last 5 days simply cause i had absolutely zero time to play.
MMA , lots of University stuff, new Girlfriend ( worked out pretty well with the girl from last blog)
time shedule is so sick ...
I need a 36h day or quit one of the above in order to play any poker >-<
Welcome to Chips Up 2
> Deciding Dealer
> Dustylove posted small blind ( €10)
squadoosh> no mouse
squadoosh> cant hu
> squadoosh, you have 5 seconds to respond
Dustylove> ok
Dustylove> I'll just wait then
> squadoosh is sitting out the current game
> An action was taken on behalf of squadoosh. Reason: Did not act in time
> Could not start game because not enough people entered the game. Returning blinds.
squadoosh> kk
squadoosh> WOW
squadoosh> do you know how bad you are
Dustylove> haha
Dustylove> says the man who pays off with K-high
squadoosh> that hand fine
squadoosh> oh right, cos king high can never win a hand
squadoosh> sorry forgot that
Dustylove> not vs trips
squadoosh> run bad thats all
squadoosh> he does same when it bricks off
squadoosh> but u got no clue
Dustylove> just keep doing that then mate
squadoosh> i will
squadoosh> keep playing how you are
squadoosh> dont wana tell u ur leaks
squadoosh> and dont have time
Dustylove> it's ok, just sit in if you feel like it
squadoosh> told you before
Dustylove> yea I know, just if you get the urge to play the fish etc
Dustylove> don't wanna pressure you
squadoosh> lets do this again tomorrow
squadoosh> see what happens
Dustylove> It just feels more normal getting thrash talked by someone who doesn't sit out
squadoosh> in vegas?
Dustylove> nope
squadoosh> too busto
Dustylove> obv
squadoosh> figures
Dustylove> You're pretty tilted, aren't you?
squadoosh> nah
squadoosh> just dont like c.ocky morons who only get c.ocky when it suits
Dustylove> yea
Dustylove> cause I started talking...
squadoosh> i got the right to talk
squadoosh> but ur just bad
Dustylove> love your logic, you start talking and I'm the cocky idiot
squadoosh> yeh
squadoosh> talk when ur good
Dustylove>
squadoosh> do you even have a clue what is going on there
> niallrmac sits down
> Deciding Dealer
> niallrmac is sitting out the current game
> Could not start game because not enough people entered the game. Returning blinds.
> Deciding Dealer
> squadoosh posted small blind ( €10)
> Dustylove posted big blind ( €20)
> Game # 2,690,405,302 starting.
> Dealing Hole Cards(6d 2h )
Dustylove> what?
> squadoosh raised for €30
> Dustylove folded
> squadoosh mucked
> squadoosh wins €70
> squadoosh brought €450 to the table
> Dustylove brought €20 to the table
> Dustylove posted small blind ( €10)
> squadoosh posted big blind ( €20)
> Game # 2,690,405,480 starting.
> Dealing Hole Cards(10s 10h )
> Dustylove raised for €40
> squadoosh folded
> Dustylove mucked
> Dustylove wins €80
> squadoosh posted small blind ( €10)
> Dustylove posted big blind ( €20)
> Game # 2,690,405,608 starting.
> Dealing Hole Cards(Jh 9d )
> squadoosh raised for €30
> Dustylove called for €30
> Dealing the Flop(10d 10s 8h )
> Dustylove checked
> squadoosh checked
> Dealing the Turn(4c )
> Dustylove bet for €80
> squadoosh called for €80
> Dealing the River(5s )
> Dustylove checked
> squadoosh bet for €180
> Dustylove folded
> squadoosh mucked
> squadoosh wins €439
> Dustylove brought €110 to the table
> Dustylove posted small blind ( €10)
> squadoosh posted big blind ( €20)
> Game # 2,690,406,228 starting.
> Dealing Hole Cards(10d 7c )
> Dustylove raised for €40
> squadoosh folded
> Dustylove mucked
> Dustylove wins €80
> squadoosh posted small blind ( €10)
> Dustylove posted big blind ( €20)
> Game # 2,690,406,391 starting.
> Dealing Hole Cards(Ac Kd )
> squadoosh raised for €30
> Dustylove raised for €130
> niallrmac left the table
> squadoosh, you have 10 seconds to respond
> squadoosh raised for €260
> Dustylove went all-in for €1,840
> squadoosh went all-in for €1,319
> €261 returned to Dustylove
> Dealing the Flop(5h 6c 2d )
> Dealing the Turn(8h )
> Dealing the River(6d )
> Dustylove shows One Pair, Sixes, with kicker card Ace
(6c 6d Ac Kd 8h )
> squadoosh mucked
> Dustylove wins €3,517 with One Pair, Sixes and kicker card Ace
> Dustylove posted small blind ( €10)
> squadoosh is sitting out the current game
> Could not start game because not enough people entered the game. Returning blinds.
squadoosh> mbn to run like *
Dustylove> haha
Dustylove> maybe the pokergods doesn't like trashtalkers?
So I get up bright and early this morning to begin my sit+go madness. I played a 4 180mans yesterday morning, and won one of them. So decent start. So yea up early to start the 180man grind., planning to do two sessions of around 6x180mans at a time. Then as I log on I see this in the lobby;
"There will be a server restart at 07:00 ET (12:00 GMT). Registration for Sit & Go Tournaments will be reduced leading up to the restart, and will eventually cease."
So these past few days poker has been pretty off. With the addition of today's sessions I am now officially under 7 buy-ins in expectation. I have been playing fairly well though so whatever.
I backpack through the city last night, planning to end the night with transformers at the imax theater. Google maps shows me a theater right by the water's edge: PERFECT! I head down there going up and down the boardwalk for what must have felt like an entire hour, scratching my head going wtf? I find the closest address and inquire about an imax establishment. The confused mini-circus attendee lets me know politely that the theater has been removed for about 3 years. Thanks google maps you toolshed piece of garbage.
Whatever, I have a good laugh at this misfortune and end up at the Lusty Lady on 1st ave. I had never been, so I strode in there. apparently its a peep show, not just a porn shop. For just 25 cents, you can look through a 1 way glass at 7 naked ladies. I spent $2 before getting bored and creeped out by the balled up tissues on the floor and extreme proximity of those "private" thin viewing booths separating myself and a fellow pervert. It was the equivilent of a Microstakes Rhino and I have never seen so many c-section scars in my life.
I head out to a poker game advertised online in the udistrict, the guy let me know last week that the game was next week. Ok, I come back twice and no ones home. Whatever. I leave after 10 minutes of no response, sitting at home when he calls me up and goes "Man where are you duuuuuude? Doors been open the whole time we got 7 here!!!" and I tells him that I can't go, because...
I checked on my car before stopping by the apartment, and my mother fucking car won't start. That's right, the battery is deader than michael jackson and I've got managerial accounting tomorrow.
You can all probably guess what 4 letter word I'm feeling right now. at least this entire post won't be disconnected when I hit post message.........???
[no malice just ranting]
yea the 90's were pretty sweet...
everyone always talks about the 80's and how awesome that decade was...especially mother fuckers who were born in 1988+; clearly they have a better understanding vicariously living through old films and books and movies and enjoyed the 80's....no they didn't, whoops! yea you know these mother fuckers "I'm born in the wrong decade!" wrong douche bag! you were born to inherit a damn good decade but too bad, all you did was whine and "reminisce" about how you were born 5 years too late.
in case some of you guys have forgotten...let me go ahead and tell you why the 90's were awesome.
1) surge. yea that's right completely overrated and underrated at the exact same time. sure it was just mountain dew... but it was fucking green with caffeine! which was way radddddd
2) glow in the dark everything - creepy crawlers, shirts, toys, underwear this is the decade where glow in the dark got big
3) power rangers, pretty much the best kick ass show for all boys and pretty much made me the man i am today. non stop ass kicking, and then some more ass kicking, and then combining robots for extra ass kicking. and then summoning a dragon from the mother fucking ocean for ultimate ass kicking. (REMEMBER THE GREEN RANGER)
4) disney teen pop stars. yea i enjoyed it i'm not gonna lie. britney spears, christina aguilera, n'sync, backstreet boys, all the feuding and the break ups and the rumors and lance being gay it was all great. it was a bigger rivalry and star wars vs star trek.
5) baywatch
there's a reason why erectile dysfunction never existed in the 90's and it's name is baywatch. but specifically pamela lee.
mother fucker, i'm so hot and steamy i can't even finish this list.
I've been up for 30 hours again, damn it. I started playing a session at MGM at 9.30pm Saturday and I ran like the sickest death (as usual.. sigh).. so I decided not to tilt and I finally recovered to a whopping +200 dollars at 4PM Sunday. Then I left.
mikes hard lemonade commercialby Gsr_01_integ, June 28
Anyone seen the commercial where they make fun of the coors color changing cans? and he touches the bottle to the guy and he screams like a little girl? i cant seem to find it anyone online or on youtube can anyone else find it?
someone help me on this one lol its a funny commercial
Hey all. Been playing on different sites for the past few weeks, i'm kinda getting tired of only playing on stars so trying out new sites. What else if new with me, oh yeah, I took m gf to the lady gaga concert in Toronto. At 1st I took my gf to it just because she likes gaga so much, so whatever I can do to make her happy I try to do. This was going to be her only concert in Canada for the whole year so all tickets were sold out and I had to buy the tickets on ebay for double the price. This was my 1st concert I ever went to as well so it was all a new experience. The good thing was we were all the way in the front of the stage so lady gaga was only 25-35 feet away from us. The whole place was full of girls. I mean the girl to guy ratio was 10:1 and the guys that were there seemed gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that) but I felt a little out of place. We had to stand 2 ½ hours just to see lady gaga come out and perform so everyone was pissed but once she came out she performed a great show. The whole time random girls elbows were digging into my arms and back, but at least I was protecting my gf from the behind crowd since I had wide shoulders and she was standing in front of me. I was taking a lot of punishment from all the girls, but my gf was dancing and singing and loved every second of it so it was worth it for me. I’m not kidding, elbows and hot sweaty skin touching every 2 seconds, I mean come on, it gets super annoying fast. It took me 2 days of rest to appreciate it since I had to calm down from being pissed at everyone jabbing me but all it was a nice experience. Lady gaga actually has an amazing voice. Some youtube links below of the actual show if you want to check it out (I was right behind the guy filming it). Also check out my website http://www.PokerMuscle.com, been working hard to get it up and running. Take care.
So instead of having alot of End of the Month blogs, i think it would be better if we just had one because im always interested in how other LPers are doing. Post here if you want.
This month i started playing differently, instead of roboting 18 tables i thought it would be better to 4 table.
Results are below. Plan to do this for another month or 2 before taking any more stabs at 200nl. Unless im watching a movie and 1 tabling it.
If i wouldnt have been forced to cash out so much earlier this month, maybe everything would be so different right now. I coulda continued to play NL50 with a solid roll, in a good mindset and all and maybe would have a good month now and ready to be at that point where I never have to cash out more than my BR can handle. Sigh..... unable to describe how bad i feel atm.
I really curse the fact that I once made so much money(for me at least, nothing compared with some of you guys) from it, because deep down inside me I probably think that I could get back up there 1 day, but every time Im close to coming back SOMETHING horrible goes wrong. I cant believe it. Looking back I would prefer to NEVER have won at that game at ALL then I would at least not waste all the fucking time Im doing now to try to have success.
Played 4 tables NL25 the last few days to try to concentrate better and it worked good, then sometimes I spewed a lot in unnecessary spots which tilted me afterwards and also looking at my cashier keeps tilting the shit out of me. Also got my fair share of coolers and running bad as usual, so overall I ended down again.
Sooo..... I hate myself right now, feeling like the biggest loser alive and I really think I should quit.
edit : I mean Im a big winner on NL25 and everything BUT i dont have the BR for it anymore and I dont have the power to go back again to NL5 and grind a br back... ahhhh im just pissed.
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