In response to the comments in my latest blog: - Page 3

I think I know whats going on here with the higher stakes players getting bored. While they may THINK to themselves that "oh I'm gonna travel the world, meet new people, take classes in things that interest me, do whatever I want!", without the social aspect none of these things come to fruition. A lot of what we do and what we accomplish in our lives is a product of who we know and who we associate with. We go to school together, we go to college together, we work together. People come and go, but you still kind of find yourself going from one thing to the next as a result of the people who influence you. But being self-employed and self-sufficient deprives you of this. Even if you have a bunch of friends, you're not exactly living with them anymore.

I strive to become a high stakes player one day, it is my dream so to speak. The dream aspect comes purely from the financial freedom. But what would I do with this freedom? Especially after everything I just said above? Well it just so happens that I live with my girlfriend whom I have been dating for the last 2 years. This makes for a very powerful acquaintance. This isnt like some buddy of mine who I would have to beg to go to Europe with me, even after I offer to pay his travel expenses. This is my future wife, my life partner. As a result we can do everything together. Thus, for someone like me, the happiness as a result from financial freedom is a reality, not a myth. I WILL actually do things with my money, I WILL actually travel to foreign destinations, I WILL actually have somebody to buy nice Christmas gifts for. And of course it goes well beyond that, such as home ownership, our children's future (when we have them), etc etc. It's not like I just fantasize about balling out of control then realize I'll really be all alone, or at best, meeting up with fellow poker players and just going to clubs, something I can already do any day of the week.

Personally, I feel unless your best friend is a high stakes players who happens to enjoy traveling with you, or you have a girlfriend/wife who will follow you, there isnt a whole lot you can do with your success in poker. It's like winning the lottery, "now what?". So to all those who find themselves lost in the success of this game, try to find somebody to share it with. That is the only reason I do it.

There is a fascinating epilogue to this whole story: I actually had to go in to work today, on a Sunday, at 6pm to get some afterhours work finished that I cant do during normal business hours. While the idea of working on a Sunday sounds pretty shitty, I rather enjoyed it, b/c it was something I needed to get done, and I felt like I had really accomplished something 2 hours later when I finished. This is something I dont think I will ever get from playing poker. There is a lot to be said about that.

gl with whatever you do.

I was waaay more happy with my life when I was ages 15-18 and did sports and swimming and hung around people all day, financial success doesn't equal satisfaction in personal achievement once a certain point is reached. I've made like 200k from this game in the 3 years i have played it and i couldn't give a fuck, i think i would be happier without it. My plan is to play poker hardcore for a year and then get out.

I think poker is a get in and get out business. All those people who stay in too long are missing out on doing other things that would make them happier. My plan is to be obsessed and go crazy for a period of time until I feel that I have reached the point where I am personally satisfied with the money and level of skill I have achieved. I plan on this being about 30 hours a week for a year to a year and a half and than I am probably done for good.

rofl u guys shouldnt blame poker for having a mediocre social life or w/e, obviously a nerd is gonna get "nerder" if he plays poker for a living, but when u do have friends family and girlfriends printing bills at home aint ganna make u feel sad or unaccomplished

I'm not saying that I'm totally stepping out of poker but I'm saying I want to quit playing for now and see what else I can find. It's not like I'm gonna work 40 hours a week straight away, I can do fine with a part-time job at first and try to balance my life that way.

phexac I'm not a social wreck lol. And yeah Tien I know that, for now I need to do this though because I believe doing that will make me happy.

Gee I wish I had your problem.

Unfortunately I've been in the work force since I was 12 - working shitty thankless back-breaking 9-5 type jobs with nothing to show for it.

Working a regular job is like playing politics. People pretend they are your friend when they aren't. They say they will do things but they don't. Ass kissing and befriending people you wouldn't normally want to be associated with is usually the only way to get ahead in the corporate world. If you want to trade your life for the life of a sucker go ahead. Working a regular job will improve your social life, but it's not the kind of social life that will bring you the happiness that you are looking for.

Go join some sports, or other activities of interest to meet people and make solid meaningful friendships.

You can fix all of your problems without leaving Poker.

The 9-5 make-ends-meet lifestyle is what drove me to Poker. Think of all the things that you can do that other people can't..

If I were you I would continue to milk Poker until you can't possibly play another hand.

If you have a lot of money take some time off from poker for 3 or so months. Go travel by yourself. Crash at some hostels (great way to meet people), make some friends have a good time - come back to the tables refreshed and ready to grind the good life.

Why is everyone saying stuff about how shitty a 9 to 5 job is and how good I have it? I know I have it good and I'm not gonna leave poker completely and I'm sure as hell not gonna work a 9 to 5 job that I find boring and be a workslave etc. My plan is to finish my education and see what I want in life, not find any random job that I don't *really* want to do only to experience a real job.. I have a bunch of money right now so I won't *have* to work for quite some time.

I have worked jobs, one for 5 years which I enjoyed a lot thanks to great friends I made there. I enjoyed that a lot more than playing poker.

On April 20 2009 07:36 Twisted wrote: Why is everyone saying stuff about how shitty a 9 to 5 job is and how good I have it? I know I have it good and I'm not gonna leave poker completely and I'm sure as hell not gonna work a 9 to 5 job that I find boring and be a workslave etc. My plan is to finish my education and see what I want in life, not find any random job that I don't *really* want to do only to experience a real job.. I have a bunch of money right now so I won't *have* to work for quite some time. I have worked jobs, one for 5 years which I enjoyed a lot thanks to great friends I made there. I enjoyed that a lot more than playing poker.

When ppl hear about some guy making hundreds of K ( or whatever you make ) quit Poker and do something useful, their first thought is that you want to become a hotel receptionist.

He's not exchanging YOUR lifestyle with his, his just moving on with his.

Good luck Twisted.

The people that are very successful at this game usually share/are successful partly because of these traits:

- introversion

Introversion is "the state of or tendency toward being wholly or predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life".Introverts tend to be more reserved and less assertive in social situations. They often take pleasure in solitary activities such as reading, writing, drawing, and using computers. The archetypal artist, writer, sculptor, composer, and inventor are all highly introverted. An introvert is likely to enjoy time spent alone and find less reward in time spent with large groups of people, though they tend to enjoy interactions with close friends. They prefer to concentrate on a single activity at a time and like to observe situations before they participate.Introverts are easily overwhelmed by too much stimulation from social gatherings and engagement. They are more analytical before speaking.Introversion is not the same as shyness. Introverts choose solitary over social activities by preference, whereas shy people avoid social encounters out of fear.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extraversion_and_introversion

To become good at poker you naturally have to spend a LOT of time alone so obviously you will find a lot of introverts among poker players.

- very difficult to satisfy
Part of the reason some players get stuck at a specific level is because they get complacent. The great ones are almost never satisfied. It's a gift and a curse at the same time. A gift, because you will always keep improving. A curse, because you're never going to be truly happy with your results.


As for benifiting society - I agree that poker adds little or nothing. I always fantasized about being an artist - a musician or an actor. I thought it would be cool. But what do they give to a society? It's just entertainment. You might change people's thoughts on some subjects, but let's not get carried away.

You might have unrealistic expectations. Who TRULY benifits our society anyway? Who has a huge impact on other people's life? I don't think you could come up with that many professions. Scientists - their discoveries change our world. Doctors - they save lives. But few people are revolutionary scientists or doctors and most jobs just add a tiny bit - and that's ok.

I would guess most people are not truly happy with their jobs. But to many it is what is - a job. A means to gain financial freedom. If people around the world would start questioning their jobs using criteria like value to society, satisfaction or respect received the unemployment rate would sky rocket. But they can set their work and life goals/private life apart. Ultimately it would be nice to have those things, but for a lot of people it's just a way to provide for their family. And that alone carries enough meaning.

On April 20 2009 05:12 Twisted wrote: I'm not saying that I'm totally stepping out of poker but I'm saying I want to quit playing for now and see what else I can find. It's not like I'm gonna work 40 hours a week straight away, I can do fine with a part-time job at first and try to balance my life that way. phexac I'm not a social wreck lol. And yeah Tien I know that, for now I need to do this though because I believe doing that will make me happy.

I understand. I came to the same conclusion as you did about 2 1/2 years ago and bailed out completely on poker.


I kinda burnt out too, even though I didn't make nearly as much money worth making from the game.


My advice is to do exactly what you are planning on doing. However don't quit poker 100% YET because it's important to always have income coming in.


Good luck bro. You're a smart guy, I'm sure you'll find out what you want to do.

Hey erwin,

I hope you find your balance, hope to see you around!
From bw to poker has been a long ride, i enjoyed a lot with you (mostly bw time) !

Good luck with your life sir, you deserve a good life.

Ron!

Great write up!

a lot of people I know (including myself but to a slightly smaller extent) are going through this at the moment. I think tomson brought up an excellent point on how hard it is to satisfy a lot highstakes poker players, the satisfaction i see many people feeling is very shortlived usually, winning 100k "should" make you satisfied for a year not a week.

my advice is that the answer will most likely not come from within, you have got to be out trying new things, talk to people and listen to their ideas, get a small volunteer gig and see if giving satisfies you.

oops that was Roman btw, im in Amsterdam for the next weekish at least, is anyone around?

Good luck, I honestly think this is a great move. fk elaborating

Sunny days wouldn't be special if it wasn't for rain.

goodluck

you dont need to explain yourself to anyone man.

On April 20 2009 21:40 Shenny wrote: you dont need to explain yourself to anyone man.

he wants feedback obv

I really don't know what to think of all this, I don't see how you can feel so bad about poker, I mean I guess I never had a job like you had for 5 years that I liked..... every job I had sucked pretty badly.....

I make good money from poker, I'm moving in my new house with my girlfriend (been with her for 2 yrs) and I plan to marry her, have children and so on, poker is basically a shortcut to financial freedom.... I guess I'm kind of also looking for recognition, or fame.... just like I was when playing broodwar....

anyways, can't you just set goals, goals for your life while you keep playing poker a few hours every day ?

I don't know if I'm special or different but I still like poker, and I never feel devastated after a losing day and I keep setting new goals and try to achieve better results... just be optimistic o_O!