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Relaxed Strategy and Management

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RiKD    United States. Mar 14 2021 21:18. Posts 6428
"Relaxed Strategy and Management" is how Jack Dorsey spends 16 hours of his Sundays on Twitter and Square. Strategy is a great word. I have always enjoyed strategy in regards to games. Strategy is also important in regards to war. Like how many weapons Raytheon can sell, how many construction jobs can Bechtel pick up, and how many military bases Halliburton can build and service. Strategy is important in business too of course. Management, however, can basically be boiled down to a manager hiring as many underlings as the higher ups will allow them to so that they can feel special and powerful, protecting themselves with politics and bureaucracy, and then maybe or maybe not doing any work that is valuable. There is management that is important. "Managing one's affairs" is important. Everyone should put some time, effort, and energy into "managing their affairs."

I am unfortunately back on facebook. Someone that i made friends with in the psych ward only has facebook and i am worried about him. Now, i can't just sit here and put all of my self worth and validation into trying to help someone i only know to a certain degree but he is a good dude. I am worried that he will go straight back to selling drugs and end up back in prison. He had some job lined up where he would be making tacos for some local taco joint. I didn't really know what to say. If i had his skills, knowledge, and connections selling drugs i probably wouldn't be bothering to make tacos for no money at some shitty taco joint even if selling drugs is a game of russian roulette. It's a tough spot. I do my best to avoid law enforcement these days so i would probably be in there grinding out the shitty taco job but if someone offered me a tempting drug smuggling job it might be hard to say no. The problem with that is that then the next one is tempting too and the next one and the next one and the next one and the risk of violence or imprisonment keeps going up and up and up.

So, nowadays, i use facebook solely as a messenger platform BUT i tend to notice the top post and notifications. I am getting a shit ton of friend suggestions from attractive women. The algorithm knows i am thirsty for THOTs. I know maybe half of them but i am not adding ANY of them. I have to hold true to something and right now that is not giving a fuck about facebook and only using it as a messenger platform. Maybe it would be good for me if my psych ward buddy messages me that he caught another charge and is in prison again. I've already exchanged messages with old friends that i probably won't talk to in a while. I would much prefer to just cut myself off completely from facebook once again but i gave this guy my word that i would check up on him.

Anyways, the top post this morning was one of my Northerner friend's view of a beach nearby me from her patio. Sometimes with time things become pretty clear. The immediate memory was one night the meeting was kind of small and i always use to sit off in the corner so i could see the entire meeting in front of me. Jasmine strolled in and sat down right next to me. She usually wore sweatpants and hoodies but today she was wearing perfume and makeup (the perfect amount). She was wearing short shorts and i don't know if i ever saw or paid attention to her legs before. She kept provocatively crossing her legs and it was hypnotizing. Talking to her after the meeting it was clear that she was horny for me but i had a rule that i would never sleep with any of the women from the meeting. I did not continue the tit for tat with her even though she had set me up the ultimate ball to spike. She probably just assumed i was an asexual nerd, did not give any fucks, and promptly found the first guy that was more than happy to have sex with her while i went home and sadly masturbated by myself once again.

Being a White Knight is stupid. No one gives a fuck. One of my best friends cheated on one of the most well liked women in the meeting (Lexi) with some random he was treating in rehab (Abby). It went sour with Abby and she overdosed on Fentanyl and died. Lexi found out and it went sour there too. Lexi started drinking and sleeping around like an absolute maniac. I rejected her because she was drunk which i'm still fine with that decision but a lot of the men in the meeting got some good fucks in and most people in the meeting didn't care. It was all too much for my friend who hit the streets and started hitting the heroin heavy again. We got him back 4 months later and no one gave any fucks and we were just happy to see him back and alive.

One of my other best friends (AJ) was vetted by pretty much all of the women in the meeting that mattered and he could pretty much sleep with whoever he wanted. That was interesting to observe. He was attractive, tall, and had a gift of gab so i don't know if anyone could have pulled this off but he did. He did not own a car so i gave him a ride home most nights but it was pretty obvious what was going on if he preferred Daniela or whoever to give him a ride home instead of me.

At one point i was also vetted by pretty much all of the women in the meeting. It is easy to be a White Knight if there are virtually 0 options... Eventually, i would get horny enough to forget my "heroic standards" and rationalize and then at that point almost all standards start to break down. I mean there are still standards of being consenting adults and having fun but what i mean is that even that shining newcomer that just walked through the door becomes fair game. I never reached AJ status. Not even close. He was just much more practiced and experienced. He was also more in the moment. I was always worried about what was going to happen and also more susceptible to catch feelings. I was always worried something would get messy but thankfully it never did. If both parties are adults and discrete the outcomes are far better. Even if something erupts into some drama that just means some of the people will latch onto that for a while and then forget and most people will not care to begin with.

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Spitfiree   Bulgaria. Mar 15 2021 10:27. Posts 9376

You can deactivate Facebook and only use messenger through messenger.com, no reason to keep FB as social media if you only want to use its messaging services, I'm doing the same thing.


  Management, however, can basically be boiled down to a manager hiring as many underlings as the higher ups will allow them to so that they can feel special and powerful, protecting themselves with politics and bureaucracy, and then maybe or maybe not doing any work that is valuable. There is management that is important. "Managing one's affairs" is important. Everyone should put some time, effort, and energy into "managing their affairs."



The thing is real, good management is nothing like what you're describing. Yes, the majority of the corporate world are just infantiles on positions of power that are rolling dice with the emotional and physical well-being of their subordinates. That doesn't invalidate the other side of the coin.

 Last edit: 15/03/2021 10:27

RiKD    United States. Mar 17 2021 20:53. Posts 6428

So, let us talk about what happens in the middle of April when both of my parents are fully vaccinated for Covid. It is less than a month away.

First thing i have to worry about is going hungry except i don't think i have to worry about that because my parents will not let me starve unless i start doing heroine and steal money from them. Next is that i would like autonomy. I have no idea how i achieve this with my disgust for employment. I don't get autonomy with disability either. Disability does not allow me to afford rent or emergencies. What is autonomy anyways? Someone spending 40+ hours a week doing the bidding of a totalitarian regime so that they can afford an apartment and Netflix is not autonomy in my books. Dr. Cornel West has said that Richard Pryor was the freest Black man of all time. I think that Dr. Cornel West is on the right track. I have spoken about my time in Buenos Aires, Argentina plenty but there are 3 things i wish to illuminate:

1.) I was self-employed. There were no bosses or bureaucracy.

2.) Gambling was not taxed in Buenos Aires. It is true that the USA still got their grubby hands in there and demanded some money but it was far, far less than i would have paid in some place horrible like Los Angeles.

3.) Law enforcement did not seem to care about anything. If they ever did you would just pay a bribe in cash and everything would be settled outside of court.

Of course, poker is inherently parasitic and there is no way to spin that otherwise. Also, poker could be downright miserable if i was not on some positive vector of run good. If i was not getting any good feelings and running bad i tended to just go on vacation. Which is pretty awesome but i felt like i went on A LOT of vacations. It gets to the point that if i am not putting in enough quality time @ poker i am no longer ahead of the curve and i lose my edge. Learning PLO fixed the drudgery and it was fun and stimulating plus i ran well "on the come up" but PLO is the devil's game. Go run some sims @ 5ptbb/100 over 100k hands. I think the std deviation is 200 or at least double std deviation of nlhe. God forbid you ever get caught in a death run. I would show up everyday motivated to struggle for victory and every day i would end up covered in shit, slightly more tilted, and another part of my soul stolen for eternity.

So, i certainly would not like to try doing THAT again!

The third thing i think about is libido but it is a little bit larger than that. There are people i do not want to have sex with that are fun to be around and there are also people that are fun to be around that i would also like to have sex with. Masturbation is fun sometimes but it is not a great substitute for human connection and human touch. A problem arises here because money and autonomy directly relates to this problem of libido. Picture some guy with $30mil to his name. He shows up in a Porsche Roadster or a La Ferrarr. He's head to toe in Prada including $5,000 leather shoes. First, they go to Barney's and he lets her run up a bill on his credit card. Then, they eat at Nobu. Lastly, they go for a walk on the beach. Maybe he has a house on the beach and they fuck for a while on his California King size bed and then cuddle to the sounds of the ocean. It doesn't really matter what this guy "does for a living." It also doesn't really matter if he is 24, 28, 32 , 36.

In comparison, my first date is to ask the woman over to my parents' home. I will make us peanut butter and jelly sandwiches. Then, we can take turns playing The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild and if for some reason that makes them wet we can go fuck upstairs but we have to be quiet because my parents are trying to sleep in the other room...

If i'm really going big we can wear sweatpants, hoodies, and sandals and go out to the local vietnamese place on the corner. I can pick you up in my perfectly acceptable car model #42069420. I have befriended the founder and executive chef of the place so maybe he can cook us up something special except for the fact that i don't know him that well yet and i never see him cooking in there. The Mi Xao and Pho are goood! Then, most people would probably want to go to some shitty movie @ the cinema but i hate that idea! The problem is there is nothing else to do in this wretched town. We could drive to some isolated place on the beach and try to fuck in my backseat but that would be uncomfortable and probably not fun... I will play music on Spotify that only i like and explain why it is so great... I guess at that point it is time to drop her off and have no attempts to kiss her even if she is sending out positive signals... Next date? There is no next date. I can't think of anything else to do even if i really liked her.


hiems   United States. Mar 17 2021 21:42. Posts 1955

r i k d

Make liquidpoker great again. 

El_Tanque   United States. Mar 18 2021 05:51. Posts 360

I had to stop to say that is the most accurate description of PLO I have ever read. Good on you Rikd.


Sleepy311   Vietnam. Mar 18 2021 14:24. Posts 94

Vietnamese restaurants right around the corner? Life is good mayne


hiems   United States. Mar 20 2021 14:47. Posts 1955

Rikd it's impressive you had the discipline to quarantine yourself for this whole year cause of your parents.

Not everyonewould be able to do that.

Make liquidpoker great again. 

RiKD    United States. Mar 23 2021 21:28. Posts 6428

Coming back to the libido. When it comes to the libido... The libido is like a mosquito. Buddhist Monk Matthieu Ricard and Kurt Cobain both talk about this. The libido is like a mosquito. It's buzzing around getting bothersome and then it's not or it is always buzzing around to some degree. I think this is a fine metaphor for much of life but then there are other situations where the libido is like a moving train.

My number 1 chance at orgasm with a woman and quelling the libido even if for just a little while is probably Zoë or Stephanie or Jessie or Kara. What do all of these women have in common? They are members of Alcoholics Anonymous. Besides doing a 4th and a 5th step with a sponsor and then no longer returning his calls when his solution to everything was pray to god i have not participated in Alcoholics Anonymous for the duration of Covid. Even before Covid i would drop into the occasional meeting but mostly just hung out at social events. This always led to people harassing me that i should go to more meetings and hunt people down to take through the 12 steps. My position was that meetings were mostly horrible and i certainly was not going to hunt anyone down to pitch some 12 step scheme that statistically did no better than anything else somebody had dreamed up. Even given my "bad" attitude a lot of people with status still liked me and that is still probably the case today. The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to not drink and i definitely do not want to drink. AA is probably where i have most of my social capital but i think this is the year i might drop out completely and it is a little scary.

At least there is Food Not Bombs. I much prefer this space to AA. I know that there are a lot of leftist haters on here but i don't see how people could hate on a project that prepares donated food and serves it to people who are food insecure. Before Covid i was getting invited to other events too which was nice but it is still a small community overall. Compared with AA, i could find something to do every night of the week with AA. Food Not Bombs was only Sunday afternoon and maybe some other events here and there. I went to a "huge" DSA barbecue once which was pretty interesting because my friend joked that literally every leftist in the area was at the bbq and it was not that big of a get together. I definitely met some interesting people and there was good conversation but there was also a moment where I declined to canvass for Bernie and i thought that i might get cancelled. LOL @ The Left. There are a handful of women involved that i would like to get dinner with and get to know them better but at this point it just kind of feels like i am some random there with no status especially after a year of not attending because of Covid.


hiems   United States. Mar 24 2021 16:11. Posts 1955

As a leftist it is your duty to get behind the Asian Lives Matter movement.

Make liquidpoker great again. 

RiKD    United States. Mar 24 2021 21:22. Posts 6428

Asian Lives Matter

Something kind of ridiculous i just thought of was i am not sure if there were any Asian children at my elementary school. In high school i had some Asian friends. My neighbors were South Korean and i got along really well with them. There were also 2 brothers from who knows where that i played tennis with who were boss. I don't think they got made fun of too much because the South Koreans were both multi-degree black belts in Tae Kwan Do and cool as fuck and the other brothers were so chill and kind that only the douchiest of douchebags would attempt to bully them. There were other peripheral Asians that i did not know too well but overall not a lot of them.

Quick story about Master Moon, the South Korean Dad neighbor. He would wake up every day just before dawn and run for like an hour and then he would train and teach Tae Kwan Do all day. He was an 8th degree black belt in Tae Kwan Do. They had a giant back porch where they would train at home. I did my best not to stalk but sometimes it was impossible not to with the out of this world shit they were doing. Master Moon proudly displayed the South Korean flag above the USA flag. I thought it was awesome and hilarious. The neighborhood was pretty chill but there was a lot of chatter about how ridiculous that was. I believe that raising a flag above the USA flag is actually a federal crime but i didn't give a fuck. Everyone was more or less afraid of Master Moon and no one said anything. I was very intimidated by him at the start but once i actually talked to him and spent some time with him he was amazing and hilarious. My crazy ass grandfather was the only other person to actually have conversations with Master Moon. Master Moon would host these parties maybe every month where all the South Koreans from the surrounding 8 counties or more would come and party late into the night. The parking in the street was maxed out for as far as the eye could see and beyond. I don't think white people were allowed. I always wanted to go to these parties but Yaeji and John always told me that besides the food they were boring. My parents liked to party too so they never cared about those get togethers but many people in the neighborhood were not happy but were afraid to say anything. I enjoyed hanging out with Yaeji and used to love when i could go over there and try out S. Korean foods. I have always loved S. Korean foods. At some point, Master Moon built a shed which was against the home owners rules. I always thought if someone wanted to build a shed on their property they should be allowed to build a fucking shed on their property. A lot of the neighborhood nits started to chatter again and get upset. Then, Master Moon brought home an absolutely beautiful Akita and housed it in the shed. Again, i didn't give 2 shits but a lot of the neighborhood did. I am not even sure if Akitas were allowed in the neighborhood. The real problem started when the Akita would howl all night disrupting everyones' sleep. I told Yaeji that the neighborhood was chattering about getting rid of the dog so they need to figure something out. Eventually, someone called someone and the authorities took the dog from the Moon family in the night and they never saw it again. I do not know if they put it in a shelter or just killed it with gas but the whole thing seemed really stupid. Yaeji, who adored that dog, was super pissed and blamed it on my parents. I told her i didn't think that it was my parents unless they lied to me. I don't know if she believed me but eventually she did not hate me.

Master Moon and his wife are probably retired. They ended up building a mansion on a golf course. Turns out if you train and teach Tae Kwan Do all day for your entire life and are extremely good at that it is pretty easy to open up Dojangs all over the place and make a shit ton of money.

Last i heard of John is that he was a wild alcoholic living in Seoul. I am unsure if the friend who told me this was accurately depicting the situation. John could very well be just having a very fun time living in Seoul.

Yaeji is a failed painter who now teaches at one of the Dojangs. I kind of love her for being a failed painter. Her work is very good it is just extremely difficult to make a living as a painter especially if one has a distaste for the hustling side of the business.

Perhaps my favorite restaurant in my current location is a Korean BBQ spot. It is the best Korean BBQ i have had outside of Koreatown in Los Angeles which was one of the only things i liked about that horrible city. I also liked the marijuana and sunsets. The Korean BBQ here is right on Main street at the epicenter of where all the riots were happening. I was going to flip out if people defaced or damaged the Korean BBQ place in any way but luckily it went untouched.

There is also a really good spot that appropriates enslaved African recipes. I have to dress up all fancy and pay $30 for rice and beans there though so i don't go there anymore.

Probably the best sushi in town is $100 for the Omakase. I showed up in a hoody, sweatpants, and some white adidas shoes because i don't care anymore. I feel like i was catching looks because this place is one of those modern, chic type of places that everyone tries to out dress each other. I also think that the waitress was groaning on the inside when i told her i don't drink. Whatever. I get the Omakase. It is heaven. $100 is not bad at all especially when it was as good as it was but i have been broke for years so it was a bit of a wild play to eat there. It is funny that back when i played poker i would never even look at sushi bills and now i can not even afford sushi anywhere in the city. I tipped well and now the waitress does not dislike me after i have already left the restaurant and will likely never see her again.

Sushi is too expensive but i love Japanese food so i go with good ramen these days. I like ramen more than pho unless i am sick or have a cold and crave pho for some reason. Pho is like chicken noodle soup but better.

I remember rumors that Asian women have tight vaginas and maybe that they smell like Jasmine. I finally slept with an Asian and i have no idea what "type" of Asian she was. She had much more California Gurl energy going on than whatever energy an Asian would have? I don't know. I remember the next morning she was arguing with her mom on speaker phone and that felt like some serious Asian energy but again i don't really know what that means. She was clean and hygienic and had a landing strip. I prefer a trimmed bush but really i don't care as long as it's not shaved and i am not going to kick anyone out of bed for being shaved unless they are less than 18 years old. Her vagina was tight but smelled like pleasant vagina rather than jasmine. Her hair smelled of Jasmine...

This is where the leftists try to cancel me for fetishization of Asian women. I liked the stock. She was a beautiful woman, she was fun to hang out with, we had fun. I don't give a shit what color someone is if they have a tight vagina and their hair smells like jasmine.... Which by the way, i learned that vaginas basically mold to whatever object is entering them and it is not like i have a high body count but from my experiences all vaginas feel good.

What am i even talking about in this post?

Oh, yeah. Asian Lives Matter....

I don't know what the fuck i'm talking about here. Help me hiems.


RiKD    United States. Mar 25 2021 02:18. Posts 6428

By the way hiems, i can not really speak to black on asian hate because there were barely any black kids at my high school and barely any asian kids. There was definitely white on asian hate but i did not see it a lot because as i said there were barely any asian kids at my high school.

In university there were shit tons of asians but it was almost as if they had their own communities in place. I did not interact with asians much. I used to study at the science & engineering library which many people referred to as "Asia" but the people there were typically polite and studying instead of talking or fucking around. If I am going to study i want to get that shit fucking taken care of and get out of there as soon as possible and that library was the place to do it. The only time i interacted with anyone is if someone asked me to watch their stuff while they took a break. Occasionally, at the home base rec center there would be an Asian invasion there to play basketball. Most people would complain and shit on their abilities. The truth is most of them were not very good but some of them were quite good and could play with anyone. It certainly was not fair for scrubby whites to talk shit about an entire group of asians. There was also a bubble tea place in a prime location that would be full of asians. Other than that i don't really recall seeing them outside of classes. There were never very many at off campus parties or the bars. I sometimes wondered what they did when they were not in class or studying.

I also think that it is fucked up that no one gives a shit about asians until some idiot goes on a killing spree. I am unsure what to do about this?

fwiw, my dad is responsible for more products being sold at Hyundai Steel than anyone at any steel mill in the history of the steel industry... I don't know if that means anything or i am just bragging about my dad. I do know that my dad loves South Korea and most of the South Koreans he has met. It has rubbed off on me. By the way, that stat about Hyundai Steel is probably not correct because chinese government corruption and cronyism with its involvement in business deals in some of the largest steel mills in the world in china would probably be a higher profit number. My dad is not a fan of many facets of chinese culture. It has rubbed off on me. Does this make me racist towards the chinese? What if i like the s koreans, japanese, thai, phillipino, cambodians, vietnamese, et al. I mean damn there are probably a lot of asians that i like. In fact, there are probably even the most amount of asians i like in china due to how many of them are in existence.

But, i need your help hiems.

What do we do regarding Asian Lives Matter?


hiems   United States. Mar 25 2021 17:50. Posts 1955

yo I havent read all of that yet.

I just want to say you write so much that its hard to read.

Also compounding to this is that I get the feeling that your replies / writing is more to get a response/write something than anything so its even harder to read all of that text.

Make liquidpoker great again.Last edit: 25/03/2021 17:56

hiems   United States. Mar 25 2021 18:06. Posts 1955

you by any chance from/near copley, oh? I go there for work alot and I ate at this sushi restaraunt that has a Taiwanese owner, and he got excited when he saw me being a fellow asian. We chatted and he mentioned that Koreans around the area made bank in the Tae Kwon Do business maybe he was talking about that guy haha.

Make liquidpoker great again. 

RiKD    United States. Mar 25 2021 20:33. Posts 6428

Why the hell do they have you going to copley, oh?

Yes. It is probably the same guy.

If you don't want to have any discourse on Asian Lives Matter i will happily go back to brainstorming how i am going to get laid and get a girlfriend in 2021.

Real quick on Asian Lives Matter. It is real easy to guess that there needs to be justice and fairness for all asians on the planet. It is harder to decipher how exactly the non-idiots will accomplish that amongst the idiots. For me, Black Lives Matter is a more natural fit because i always had black friends and i studied the civil rights movement in regards to black people in university. The idiots that hate the vietnamese, japanese, koreans from past wars will likely die soon if they haven't died already but the increasing demonization of the chinese seems to only be ramping up. I do think that future puppets in suits will get real comfortable sucking off the chinese and swallowing loads with a smile. Maybe they even gargle the cum for a while or cum swap around the boardroom but currently all of the undead zombies of the us govt try to take this position of strength as if we have any leverage whatsoever and it is laughable and probably dangerous. People fail to understand that the USA is a failed state holding on for dear life. A lot of our main allies like great britain are in an even worse position. Would i want to live in china as a working class person? I don't think so. I don't believe that the usa and the western world should just roll over and die but i am not sure what they should do. I have not studied this too much but it appears that the han chinese are an ethnic group in which there is a lot of rhetoric that they are superior to any other human on earth. If this is false please let me know. If this is true it is at least a tad bit scary. I think another problem is that people take bigotry from their grandfather who put in a tour of duty in vietnam and then ascribe it to all asians including asians that have lived in the usa for generations. This combined with the NEW HAN SCARE (!!!) and it is not a pretty picture. I have very little data but i am 100% sure that not all asians are han chinese that want to take over the world.

Oh, by the way. I am looking into moving to Taiwan since it is relatively easier to get citizenship as a usa citizen than basically anywhere else. I don't even know that much about Taiwan but would wager it is on a better trajectory than the usa in the middle of collapse. I don't even know if i could pick up mandarin at this point but i am willing to try. I can also get a uk passport and see if that is advantageous in any way but most likely it is worth less than shit at this point.

I said i was going to brainstorm about dating, getting laid, and getting a girlfriend but i think i'd rather take a walk. Notice i always want to talk about fucking versus what is supposed to be my raison d'etre of reducing suffering and improving happy. What does the weekend say?

"I just fucked 2 bitches before i came over... we are going to fuck at my tempo."

You ever have a good fuck with a hot bitch and your whole walk and demeanor changes?

Mega-virgins are typically not having good fucks with hot bitches but it is like a virgin to chad transformation. The power levels increase.

I need my power levels maxed out if i am truly going to be capable of helping anyone. It is true that in certain areas i can help people on auto-pilot or worse but that seems like a terrible bar to strive for. At bare minimum i need to have my shit together at least in the categories that i am trying to help someone with. There is value in discussing where i have gone wrong in my life but people still need some vestige of being ok. Or, we could all just repeatedly read The Trouble With Being Born by Emil Cioran and consider how we want to kill ourselves. The answer is with potent gas or poison if you were wondering. But, i would rather imagine something else.


dnagardi   Hungary. Mar 25 2021 22:16. Posts 1730

so whats your plan on getting a girlfriend RiKD


dnagardi   Hungary. Apr 01 2021 19:30. Posts 1730

are u in the psych ward again?


Santafairy   Korea (South). Apr 01 2021 21:01. Posts 1903


  On April 01 2021 18:30 dnagardi wrote:
are u in the psych ward again?


That hardly counts as a plan

It seems to be not very profitable in the long run to play those kind of hands. - Gus Hansen 

dnagardi   Hungary. Apr 03 2021 20:05. Posts 1730

lold.


RiKD    United States. Apr 05 2021 05:34. Posts 6428


  On March 25 2021 21:16 dnagardi wrote:
so whats your plan on getting a girlfriend RiKD



There is no plan. I will likely not get a girlfriend in 2021. I could wager that the chances are 0% then easily make that happen but that is not what I am talking about. There are crusty, anarchist punks that live in this city. I have met some of them. They don't give a fuck and would probably be a good option for me. I don't really know how different genres of the punk community would view me though. The truth is I like Bad Brains and I used to go to a bunch of punk shows with my friend Iain who was really into it his whole life. The fact that many facets of the punk community were always trying to label things or dress in a certain way or listen to only a certain type of music was a turn off. For me, it was about the music and the energy especially at live shows.

A lot of "leftist chicks" hold on to mainstream ambition. I do not blame them for this. It is just the way the cookie crumbles. I am not better than them. It is just that I am farther and farther away from mainstream ambition with every day that passes. Which makes me an unsuitable boyfriend for a huge chunk of the population.

Don't worry. It is not the end of the world (yet). I do not hold any expectations that a girlfriend will complete me or make me feel one with the universe. It is simply trading one set of problems for another set of problems. Obviously, as the quality of the person and the relationship goes up the latter situation starts to look special but that is not the immediate choice that I have.


RiKD    United States. Apr 07 2021 22:28. Posts 6428

I was thinking about the worst university course I ever took the other day and the answer is Econ 200 Principles of Macro-economics. It was in a 500 person lecture hall that was always hot and uncomfortable. The professor barely spoke english and when I looked him up he was clearly only there for research. He simply read directly from powerpoint presentations. I eventually realized that the professor posted the powerpoint presentations on the class website. The recitation was also a joke. The TA was chinese and barely spoke english and was an awful TA. There was a quiz every recitation but when I realized how much of a waste of time it all was and the quiz was such a small % of the grade it did not matter I decided that going out drinking with my friends on Thirsty Thursday was way better than waking up early and walking 20 min. across campus for such a shitty experience. The textbook was a ridiculously expensive hardcover obv. I don't think I even took it out of the shrink wrap but the bookstore still classified it as used when I sold it back to them. I remember having discussions with a friend about how much of a rip off it all is. When we calculated out how much the class cost per lecture it was insane. His position was that we should not worry about that because what we are really paying for is the grade on the transcript (and knowledge and a network, etc.). I was still pissed off that I was paying that much money for classes that were useless. I got an A+ on the midterm by looking over the power point presentations on the class website. Then, I got overconfident and did absolutely nothing. With the grading system in that class since I got an A+ on the midterm it was impossible for me to fail the class somehow. I didn't even study for the final. It felt weird walking back into that lecture hall to take that final. The place was fucking packed and more hot and uncomfortable than ever. I was pretty tilted taking that final. I failed it and ended up getting a "C" on my transcript... I was just happy to get out of there. I never took another economics course at university although I did have to re-enter that wretched lecture hall for other classes.

I am just full of resentments regarding economics.

They treat economics as if it is the same as Isaac Newton discovering physics or calculus. As if Adam Smith's relationship to economics and capitalism is the same thing as Isaac Newton and physics and calculus.

If Milton Friedman says something regarding economics it is the same as saying 2+2=4...

Another resentment:

I remember I was in my 3rd year of university and I am finally taking the big seminar course teaching us how to be historians. It feels like a big day when they gave me my Secret Password for JSTOR. All I had to do was pay absurd amounts in tuition and fees and declare myself a history major. Finally, when I get really good at using the university libraries and JSTOR I graduate and my student id and JSTOR password no longer work. At that time it was not even possible for outsiders to get access to JSTOR. I just googled it and JSTOR is offering $19.99/month for 1,500 journals but that is no where close to full access. In university I could get primary sources from whenever, seemingly infinite journals, there is a lot of stuff on there. So, one day Adam Swartz realizes this and decides to do something about it. He attempts to share JSTOR with the world. The establishment freaks out and puts a boatload of years prison sentence over his head. Adam Swartz eventually kills himself... The establishment are happy?

Turns out you can't critique Barack Obama at Harvard University...

Dr. Cornel West gets fired.

Turns out you can't critique Wall Street at Yale University...

David Graeber gets fired.

Turns out you can't critique the War in Iraq at The New York Times...

The New York Times writes a letter to Chris Hedges that if he does not stop critiquing the war on Iraq in his articles they will fire him. Chris Hedges quits.

Oh, by the way, 175 years prison sentence hanging over Julian Assange's head while he rots away... For being a journalist???

We are supposed to worship and trust these institutions?


 
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