GameStop WallStreet scandal. - Page 9

On March 12 2021 05:41 Baalim wrote: So if you weren't having a break down how did you end up in the psych ward being interviewed by 4 psychiatrists?

Notice how you included the word "psychotic" last time? That is usually what is considered a breakdown. A "psychotic break."

At the time of talking to that doctor in the psych holding room i was not psychotic. I was very manic but not psychotic. I remember sending my sisters an email that morning something i had spent a lot of time curating on Pinterest. I never go on Pinterest. In fact i think the only times i've been on pinterest are when i am manic. I compared myself to Picasso and then joked that grandiosity is a symptom of bipolar 1. I mean it was a well curated board or whatever you call it but who cares it's fucking bullshit i am getting owned by a corporate algorithm to waste my existence on pinterest. Anyways, i am painting and listening to music and my psychiatrist calls to tell me that she is sick and she has to cancel that day's appointment. I give her an update and she says maybe i should go to the ER. I get a little frustrated with her and tell her that i am already in debt to XXXX and that i will not be going to the ER unless i get help from them to pay for it. Besides me getting confrontational we end the call on good terms. I am still painting and listening to music and my parents come home from a walk and say they talked to my psychiatrist and they think they should take me to the ER. I say ok. If someone wants to criticize my psychiatrist that is fine. I criticize her because her answer for everything is "go to the ER." In the past i have had 3 psychiatrists that would have talked with my parents and worked out a situation to up my medications and get me some Ativan. But, in this case i know that i am manic. I am not going to argue with them if they think i should go to the ER.

In the holding area there was a line that i could not cross unless i asked a nurse. I had a chair that converted to a bed and a tv in the corner of the room that was so high up it was hard to fathom watching something on it. The first thing i did when i got there was roll up the blanket into a ball and shoot a 3 pointer at the garbage can outside of my area. Not because i thought i was Steph Curry hitting the winning shot in game 7 but no i just thought it would be fun and i was right. I made it and it was fun but one of the nurse's snapped at me and i realized "oh yeah" and said "sorry maam" and got the blanket and folded it on the chair. Then i got the idea that the blanket was similar weight to pizza dough and i could practice my pizza moves. It made me happy that i still had my moves but got bored quickly so i asked one of the nurses if i could have art supplies. I got lost in doing art and wrote a thank you to the nurses on each page. When i said in another post that the nurses liked me it was not because i thought i was some charismatic enigma but simply because i was a sick person that they had to care for in a place full of sick people and i was polite and i was not causing any problems. It's not like i thought these art gifts would sell for $50,000 on the art market so some of these nurses could buy a new car or a downpayment on a house. No, even at the time i understood that some probably threw it away at the earliest acceptable moment. I didn't think the weirdly placed tv was secretly controlled by the NSA. No, it was just a shitty tv in a shitty placement. There were already plenty visible surveillance cameras anyways.

So, the doctor stops by. He asks me if i have thoughts of killing anyone. "Uhhh... Nancy Pelosi?" how? "Uhhh... Maybe guillotine or i was telling my dad 2 shots in the heart and 1 shot to the head." what does that mean? "ummm... well, you would get a handgun with a silencer and then shoot her twice in the heart and once in the head. And, also Vladimir Putin. Russia Russia Russia. Navalny poisoning. I do not like Vladimir Putin..."

ummm... ok... what about thoughts of harming yourself?

"not yet."

what do you mean not yet?

"i was thinking maybe when i'm like 55."

why 55?

"I don't know. Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Ernest Hemingway, Kate Spade. Maybe if i don't have things figured out by 55 it would be a good time to go."

thank you "thank you"

Maybe, here is another place to criticize my psychiatrist for not fighting for me harder to not be involuntary. It sounds like she did all she could but there is no way for me to know the truth.

It's just kind of funny to me now the fact that i was voluntary the first time to the psych ward when i was the farthest from reality i have ever been. The first memory of that experience is not taking a shower because i thought they were going to gas me. Something was happening where my mind literally was acting as if it was experiencing infinity. I would let out a primal yell that would put Maynard to shame on the Grudge and then they would race to hit me with sedative needles and medicines. Another time i was catatonic standing up out in the common area for what felt like 10 hours. That was hell. No one did anything either until i didn't respond when they called me for dinner...

The second time in the psych ward i was literally carried by my friends and i was out of my mind. I was still voluntary. I remember obsessing that there was still a chance to sleep with Laurel who i thought i was in love with at the time but it was really just a crazy, severe, manic crush. I was trying to convince her to go to the handicapped restroom in the psych ward waiting room with me to have a quickie before i have to go upstairs. Once they set me up with my room i thought about those birds that do an elaborate dance for their prospective partners. I thought that if i did an impressive enough performance that no one could follow Laurel would see this or sense this somehow and accept me as her partner. I made art, i wrote poetry, i did ballet, and after a fucking incredibly long time it escalated to me yelling my love for Laurel (think better than Daniel Day Lewis in There Will Be Blood) while punching holes into the ceiling and getting my knuckles and the ceiling all bloody. Oh, lol. I forgot that i covered all of the walls with "cave" (crayon) art. Yeah, the nurses were not very happy with me. The next morning i did rain dances until breakfast then i thought that i could figure out a way to break out of the joint. I was convinced that there were safes behind the drywall that contained master keys to unlock my freedom. Now, THAT is some good psychosis.

I don't want to dwell too much on all of this when i should probably be sleeping. I think the doctors were trying to do their job. As a collective they weren't wildly off the mark on the important stuff. I do remember hallucinating the designs on chairs and floors moving in the psych ward. But, with this one even at my worst i was only mildly psychotic. I remember one time my parents and i were trying to contain it at home and one night i was hallucinating what i thought was a message from deadmau5 in the ceiling. It was stimulating but it was also excruciating to try and focus like that for 3 hours. I didn't really know what it meant. All i knew is that it wasn't going away. My point is that i would rather be in my own bed watching shit move around than sharing a room with some paranoid schizo that is going on about delusions and hoarding pencils for later. Maybe i would tell someone about it but he made me pinky swear that i have his back and i don't think that he would stab me with a pencil and i don't want to be a snitch either.

So, Baal, "Oh Wise One," why should i get a new psychiatrist?

On March 12 2021 08:27 RiKD wrote: Maybe, here is another place to criticize my psychiatrist for not fighting for me harder to not be involuntary. It sounds like she did all she could but there is no way for me to know the truth.

Their job is to stay objective and assess the situation. 'Fighting' for you harder means that they would get involved and lead to a biased opinion. I'm guessing that in the interview you've had many other topics on different levels and the psychiatrists were probing you. Not fighting for you is literally the best thing they could do for you

Rikd can you start a you start a youtube vlog channel lol.

Maybe that is true but what it seems like most people on this site do not understand is that there was no initial interview.

I was asked by someone i had never met before who looked 26 if i wanted to harm anyone and if i wanted to harm myself then i was in handcuffs getting escorted to the psych ward by the police. I was received by a nurse that double checked my info, then gave me some medications, then gave me the advice to never tell anyone that i want to leave b/c it will prolong my stay. I was stuck in there for at least 10+ days because they scheduled the forensics psychiatrist interrogation in 8 days and then a judge had to deem me fit to leave but they were only in session on Tuesdays and Thursdays and there was additional bureaucracy beyond just a digital ruling.

Being in the psych ward and just sort of hanging out isn't terrible but it does cost a shit ton of money and there are legitimately crazy, violent people in there. One guy basically had run ins with everyone. He was 6'6'' and 260 lbs. which he used to try and intimidate people but i am pretty sure he did not know how to fight. I was sick of his lies one day and just went into an aggressive biology lesson. He did not believe me. I told him i was just trying to chill and play music for my friends and he can ask any nurse or doctor with the appropriate education. It kept flaring up. I think what set him off is i got loud and told him, "you don't have a dominant gene in your body" which i literally meant he has blonde hair, blue eyes, and pale skin and all of those genes are recessive but i think he thought i was challenging his masculinity and then he got up in my face and cornered me. It was really stupid and overconfident to allow him to corner me and i did feel like it could have gone bad from there but my friend who is an adept martial artist and former police officer/prison guard recognized what was happening and broke us up. That guy was a lot of talk and i would wager would go to self-harm before harming someone else but it still sucks to have to keep tabs on someone and keep track of if they are going to try some crazy retaliatory move. Maybe surprisingly the women were much more violent when push comes to shove. Maybe that is just a sample size thing.

It sounds absolutely unbelievable that you'd be detained into a psych ward and then be forced to pay for it. I can only imagine how many ruined lives were made to suffer even more because of that

So if you tell them you want to stay there for a long time will they release you earlier?

I mean I stabbed myself multiple times with a garden tool when I was a teenager and the police warned me if I keep doing it I'll go to a psych ward, then left. that was some top level community policing in retrospect.

On March 12 2021 19:56 Spitfiree wrote: It sounds absolutely unbelievable that you'd be detained into a psych ward and then be forced to pay for it. I can only imagine how many ruined lives were made to suffer even more because of that

Those fuckers can do whatever they want. There is no court or accountability for them.

Probably the worst i already mentioned in this thread. I was honest about my speeding and reckless driving in the previous week before ending up in the psych ward at another time. This psychiatrist decides to take my license which is fair but at the same time i'm in the psych ward with no access to a car... Honestly, my mental health and medications are pretty stable within a week or two of leaving the psych ward. This fucker makes me bother people for rides for 3+ fucking months telling me every time i see him that he wouldn't want me to recklessly drive with himself or his family on the road... This was not related to any courts or any of his supervisors he just decided to not give me my license back.

On March 12 2021 08:27 RiKD wrote: Show nested quote + On March 12 2021 05:41 Baalim wrote: So if you weren't having a break down how did you end up in the psych ward being interviewed by 4 psychiatrists? Notice how you included the word "psychotic" last time? That is usually what is considered a breakdown. A "psychotic break." At the time of talking to that doctor in the psych holding room i was not psychotic. I was very manic but not psychotic. I remember sending my sisters an email that morning something i had spent a lot of time curating on Pinterest. I never go on Pinterest. In fact i think the only times i've been on pinterest are when i am manic. I compared myself to Picasso and then joked that grandiosity is a symptom of bipolar 1. I mean it was a well curated board or whatever you call it but who cares it's fucking bullshit i am getting owned by a corporate algorithm to waste my existence on pinterest. Anyways, i am painting and listening to music and my psychiatrist calls to tell me that she is sick and she has to cancel that day's appointment. I give her an update and she says maybe i should go to the ER. I get a little frustrated with her and tell her that i am already in debt to XXXX and that i will not be going to the ER unless i get help from them to pay for it. Besides me getting confrontational we end the call on good terms. I am still painting and listening to music and my parents come home from a walk and say they talked to my psychiatrist and they think they should take me to the ER. I say ok. If someone wants to criticize my psychiatrist that is fine. I criticize her because her answer for everything is "go to the ER." In the past i have had 3 psychiatrists that would have talked with my parents and worked out a situation to up my medications and get me some Ativan. But, in this case i know that i am manic. I am not going to argue with them if they think i should go to the ER. In the holding area there was a line that i could not cross unless i asked a nurse. I had a chair that converted to a bed and a tv in the corner of the room that was so high up it was hard to fathom watching something on it. The first thing i did when i got there was roll up the blanket into a ball and shoot a 3 pointer at the garbage can outside of my area. Not because i thought i was Steph Curry hitting the winning shot in game 7 but no i just thought it would be fun and i was right. I made it and it was fun but one of the nurse's snapped at me and i realized "oh yeah" and said "sorry maam" and got the blanket and folded it on the chair. Then i got the idea that the blanket was similar weight to pizza dough and i could practice my pizza moves. It made me happy that i still had my moves but got bored quickly so i asked one of the nurses if i could have art supplies. I got lost in doing art and wrote a thank you to the nurses on each page. When i said in another post that the nurses liked me it was not because i thought i was some charismatic enigma but simply because i was a sick person that they had to care for in a place full of sick people and i was polite and i was not causing any problems. It's not like i thought these art gifts would sell for $50,000 on the art market so some of these nurses could buy a new car or a downpayment on a house. No, even at the time i understood that some probably threw it away at the earliest acceptable moment. I didn't think the weirdly placed tv was secretly controlled by the NSA. No, it was just a shitty tv in a shitty placement. There were already plenty visible surveillance cameras anyways. So, the doctor stops by. He asks me if i have thoughts of killing anyone. "Uhhh... Nancy Pelosi?" how? "Uhhh... Maybe guillotine or i was telling my dad 2 shots in the heart and 1 shot to the head." what does that mean? "ummm... well, you would get a handgun with a silencer and then shoot her twice in the heart and once in the head. And, also Vladimir Putin. Russia Russia Russia. Navalny poisoning. I do not like Vladimir Putin..." ummm... ok... what about thoughts of harming yourself? "not yet." what do you mean not yet? "i was thinking maybe when i'm like 55." why 55? "I don't know. Robin Williams, Anthony Bourdain, Ernest Hemingway, Kate Spade. Maybe if i don't have things figured out by 55 it would be a good time to go." thank you "thank you" Maybe, here is another place to criticize my psychiatrist for not fighting for me harder to not be involuntary. It sounds like she did all she could but there is no way for me to know the truth. It's just kind of funny to me now the fact that i was voluntary the first time to the psych ward when i was the farthest from reality i have ever been. The first memory of that experience is not taking a shower because i thought they were going to gas me. Something was happening where my mind literally was acting as if it was experiencing infinity. I would let out a primal yell that would put Maynard to shame on the Grudge and then they would race to hit me with sedative needles and medicines. Another time i was catatonic standing up out in the common area for what felt like 10 hours. That was hell. No one did anything either until i didn't respond when they called me for dinner... The second time in the psych ward i was literally carried by my friends and i was out of my mind. I was still voluntary. I remember obsessing that there was still a chance to sleep with Laurel who i thought i was in love with at the time but it was really just a crazy, severe, manic crush. I was trying to convince her to go to the handicapped restroom in the psych ward waiting room with me to have a quickie before i have to go upstairs. Once they set me up with my room i thought about those birds that do an elaborate dance for their prospective partners. I thought that if i did an impressive enough performance that no one could follow Laurel would see this or sense this somehow and accept me as her partner. I made art, i wrote poetry, i did ballet, and after a fucking incredibly long time it escalated to me yelling my love for Laurel (think better than Daniel Day Lewis in There Will Be Blood) while punching holes into the ceiling and getting my knuckles and the ceiling all bloody. Oh, lol. I forgot that i covered all of the walls with "cave" (crayon) art. Yeah, the nurses were not very happy with me. The next morning i did rain dances until breakfast then i thought that i could figure out a way to break out of the joint. I was convinced that there were safes behind the drywall that contained master keys to unlock my freedom. Now, THAT is some good psychosis. I don't want to dwell too much on all of this when i should probably be sleeping. I think the doctors were trying to do their job. As a collective they weren't wildly off the mark on the important stuff. I do remember hallucinating the designs on chairs and floors moving in the psych ward. But, with this one even at my worst i was only mildly psychotic. I remember one time my parents and i were trying to contain it at home and one night i was hallucinating what i thought was a message from deadmau5 in the ceiling. It was stimulating but it was also excruciating to try and focus like that for 3 hours. I didn't really know what it meant. All i knew is that it wasn't going away. My point is that i would rather be in my own bed watching shit move around than sharing a room with some paranoid schizo that is going on about delusions and hoarding pencils for later. Maybe i would tell someone about it but he made me pinky swear that i have his back and i don't think that he would stab me with a pencil and i don't want to be a snitch either. So, Baal, "Oh Wise One," why should i get a new psychiatrist?

I still dont get it, you share a pinterest board with your sister and then you are sent to the ER? it doesnt make any sense, you either don't remember clearly or you aren't telling what went on, not that its that important tbh.

This is the most congruent and elocuent I've seen you write in years so if they changed your meds or something good for you, it seems to be working.

I said you should get a new psychiatrist because I've seen you stuck in a bad place, maninc and disatisfied with life for a long time and I dont think you should make this the status quo, Its very hard to reach conclusions with the little info I have, I felt your psychologist wasn't challenging or pushing you enough, but I guess striving for better yourself is a right wing chud fantasy, you should listen to Loco, get disability wallow in self pity and rot. and "run out the clock" as you said.

On March 12 2021 20:07 Stroggoz wrote: So if you tell them you want to stay there for a long time will they release you earlier?

Actually, YES.

One of my friends was a homeless schizophrenic past problem heroin user. They picked him up when he was damaging the food stamps building. He was more than happy to get a good night's sleep in a comfortable bed, take a hot shower, get some clean clothes, 3 hot meals, etc etc etc rather than them throwing him right back out to the streets. The problem is that there are more sick people than beds. Many of those people were sicker than him at that point in time and almost all of them have a larger bankroll.

One of my other friends who had the bankroll they still kicked out before he wanted to leave. We were filling out the exiting forms and he got pissed off and started an argument with the nurses that basically no one has paid any attention to him and he feels like shit and all they've actually done is just fill him up to the gills with Seroquel which makes him feel even worse. They ignored him and instead rushed him through the forms. Which by the way, Seroquel is like this in style drug here now a days. I guess i didn't get too psychotic this last go around but with the amount they have me on it seems hopeless to lose any of the weight that i gained because of Seroquel in the first place. This friend they were so worried to get him out of the psych ward on schedule that they took out all of his clothes from the dryer when they were still wet and gave him the boot not giving any fucks.

On March 12 2021 20:17 Stroggoz wrote: I mean I stabbed myself multiple times with a garden tool when I was a teenager and the police warned me if I keep doing it I'll go to a psych ward, then left. that was some top level community policing in retrospect.

lol

Gamestop thread turns into political or psychology one. Classic LP loool

Mental health is a much more interesting topic than an overvalued joke of a market especially during a period where huge inflation will devalue the dollar

Yeah but come on now, we got like tons of blogposts and threads for that already.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Thomas_Knight

RiKD have you ever heard of this guy?!?! He is such a badass!! Maybe you could draw inspiration from him and do something like this!!!

On March 13 2021 23:02 whammbot wrote: Yeah but come on now, we got like tons of blogposts and threads for that already.

This is basically the only active thread on this site right now...

you guys never cease to amaze me

On March 14 2021 00:00 hiems wrote: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christopher_Thomas_Knight RiKD have you ever heard of this guy?!?! He is such a badass!! Maybe you could draw inspiration from him and do something like this!!!

That is amazing. I used to go to Maine every summer for vacation. I love it out there. However, i think i am too attached to too many modern day comforts to want to attempt something like this. I have also been in New Hampshire in March which was fine because i spent most of my time indoors in heated spaces but i can't imagine being isolated in a forest in Maine in January. I also enjoy social connections too much. It is true that i have not had much over Covid and i am ok but i still talk to my parents every day, there are conversations over telecommunications software available, and there is also my cellular phone. My sister and my brother in law rented a log cabin in the middle of no where in Vermont for some time and that is a little more my speed. I have also camped out in the forests of PA with groups of people which turned out to be peak existence in most cases. I would definitely not want to be out there by myself with no amenities in the winter though.

RiKD when are you going to proclaim me as your new leader and ditch the degenerate Loco!!