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sodarage   United States. Mar 22 2013 21:13. Posts 13 | | |
So I've been with this site forever. I just made this account because I forgot the password to my other account and I'm pretty sure it is linked to my deactivated school account.
Anyway I want to get this whole thing off my chest and out my mind by posting about it. Please give me advice from your own personal experiences if you can... thanks.
So... my first love and my other firsts(yeahyeahyeah). The relationship lasted a bit over two years (our third and fourth year of college plus the next 6 months long distance). We did the whole planning out our future thing with each other which would have us spending five years long distance (sucks but we thought we were meant to be... as all couples do) before getting back together. I thought the long distance was going fine, she was busy with her job and I was busy with my own applications and stuff, but then she started becoming non responsive. I called her out on it and she asked if we could take a break. I said break = breakup so she asked if she could take that back. I said yes but the day after that I initiated the breakup because you don't just ask someone for a break for no reason. She had to have been wanting to see other people or was already cheating, right? So we broke up. Even though we broke up mutually, it feels like she broke up with me.
Anyway, She said she still loved me and if we ended up single in the same area when we're 30 we can give it another chance. I agreed because she's the one... right? So she wanted to keep talking as if we were friends in the meantime because that's how we got along together. We were friends. Honestly I wanted to keep talking to her too, but it hurt talking to her so I blocked her on FB and told her I wouldn't talk to her until I was ready.
I got through two months without talking to her until she texted me one day asking talk. I thought I was fine so I called. We spent the next three days talking just like when we were together, but we acknowledged we were single and hoped each other found someone else since we were each other's last resort... kinda. She told me she already slept with a coworker but it was a rebound. It shocked me since we literally just broke up, but we're both single now so whatever. However, it seemed like she was moving on while I'm stuck still thinking about her so I cut contact with her again.
So this is my current situation. Have any of you kept contact with an ex? How long should I not contact her for? Couple week/months/forever? I'd like some advice please.
Thanks
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Arirang   Canada. Mar 22 2013 21:17. Posts 1673 | | |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 22 2013 21:20. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 22 2013 20:17 Arirang wrote:
move on mothafucka |
trying haha. so don't talk to her at all? |
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RiKD   United States. Mar 22 2013 21:52. Posts 9385 | | |
Get some other shit moving so you can talk to her or not talk to her and not give a fuck either way. Messing around with this pussy ass hedging shit like "oh, if we are 30 and living in the same place and haven't found the one yet let's settle for each other until I can find "the one" and fuck him with out telling you while you tuck me into bed and tell me bedtime stories when I'm feeling blue..." you gotta put an end to this shit now. She's fucking other people and will continue to fuck other people and will only give you a call when she's not currently fucking other people and feeling down about it.
Don't intentionally block her or ignore her or anything like that. Just do other shit so she is a less and less important part of your life. She is far, far away fucking other dudes. She shouldn't be an important part of your life whatsoever when unless you live on a farm or reservation there are thousands, hundred of thousands, millions of women that are not far, far away... potentially and very likely fucking other dudes... but not far, far away and incapable of fucking you as well.
Just go with the breast fucking Kate Upton rule:
Would you be writing this blog or giving a shit about any of this if you were breast fucking Kate Upton? That's literal and figurative. Breast Fucking Kate Upton doesn't necessarily have to be Breast Fucking Kate Upton. It could be doing, building, creating, growing, moving, ANYTHING. |
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goose58   United States. Mar 22 2013 23:24. Posts 871 | | |
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RaiNKhAN   United States. Mar 22 2013 23:38. Posts 4080 | | |
rikd breast fukkin kronicles |
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The biggest Rockets, Sixers, and Grizzlies fan you will ever meet! | |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 22 2013 23:49. Posts 13 | | |
Thanks rikd I love you <3 |
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NighTLesS15   United States. Mar 22 2013 23:51. Posts 241 | | |
Soda.... no matter what you do talking to her only will provide negative feelings. If she isn't ugly she will be banging other dudes and it will be easier for her. Man the fuck up and enjoy your single time. Go out and party, or go out and visit museums and music shows, life is there. Everyday you spend thinking about talking to her or thinking not talking to her is a day wasted where you could find some better pussy. end of story |
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Frinkx: 1k on mario cart? PoorUser: Snap call | |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 23 2013 00:14. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 22 2013 22:51 NighTLesS15 wrote:
Soda.... no matter what you do talking to her only will provide negative feelings. If she isn't ugly she will be banging other dudes and it will be easier for her. Man the fuck up and enjoy your single time. Go out and party, or go out and visit museums and music shows, life is there. Everyday you spend thinking about talking to her or thinking not talking to her is a day wasted where you could find some better pussy. end of story |
Yessir. Thanks |
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mnj   United States. Mar 23 2013 00:49. Posts 3848 | | |
we've all been there
(myself included)
took me 2 years to get through my ex. your not weak. it takes time |
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traxamillion   United States. Mar 23 2013 01:55. Posts 10468 | | |
happened to me twice. First time we still saw each other for way too long after the breakup.
this last time was a 4 year relationship ended last march, we only saw each other and had sex a couple times last time being in november. Haven't talked since and probably wont.
the quicker you can get over it the better |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 23 2013 03:08. Posts 13 | | |
Thanks guys. I'll go breast fuck kate upton so I stop thinking about her. |
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Tensai176   Canada. Mar 23 2013 04:45. Posts 1018 | | |
If you're still feeling this way, you're probably not ready yet right?
Keep busy, find hobbies, guitar, workout, eat healthy and don't talk to her until you're really ready.
This shit happens man, chin up,
goodluck |
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Fujikura   United States. Mar 23 2013 07:10. Posts 1795 | | |
Coming from a guy who just recently got single... man up, go out there, and crush pussies. |
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aka SouL)Z(Isadie and SouL)P(Fujikura | |
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Mariuslol   Norway. Mar 23 2013 08:21. Posts 4742 | | |
To contribute to RiKD's inspirational post, here's a picture of Kate!!
+ Show Spoiler +
And here is one where we emphasize more on the breasts he was talking about!
+ Show Spoiler +
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eestwood   United Kingdom. Mar 23 2013 08:54. Posts 702 | | |
gotta go with the BFKU rule |
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TheTrees   United States. Mar 23 2013 14:31. Posts 1592 | | |
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 23 2013 16:59. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 23 2013 13:31 TheTrees wrote:
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
I completely agree. thanks |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 23 2013 17:00. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 23 2013 07:21 Mariuslol wrote:
To contribute to RiKD's inspirational post, here's a picture of Kate!!
+ Show Spoiler +
And here is one where we emphasize more on the breasts he was talking about!
+ Show Spoiler +
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hahah <3 |
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RaiNKhAN   United States. Mar 23 2013 17:53. Posts 4080 | | |
| On March 23 2013 13:31 TheTrees wrote:
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
qft, first concise, legit advice itt |
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The biggest Rockets, Sixers, and Grizzlies fan you will ever meet! | |
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TheTrees   United States. Mar 23 2013 17:56. Posts 1592 | | |
| On March 23 2013 15:59 sodarage wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 23 2013 13:31 TheTrees wrote:
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
I completely agree. thanks
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Also, completely ignoring women drives them insane. If she texts/calls, give it a few days before you respond. |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 23 2013 19:23. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 23 2013 16:56 TheTrees wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 23 2013 15:59 sodarage wrote:
| On March 23 2013 13:31 TheTrees wrote:
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
I completely agree. thanks
|
Also, completely ignoring women drives them insane. If she texts/calls, give it a few days before you respond. |
The thing is that I can easily cut contact with her and be okay with it, but part of me wants to just man up and be strong enough to talk to her without feeling bad. And I would really like her as a friend too since we've already been doing that for the past 2+ years, but it's hard keeping the friendship and removing any romantic feelings I have for her.
So.. I guess I'll just reply if she ever texts/calls me but go find something to occupy my time to get my mind off of her?
Yes I need to stop being an emotional needy woman right now, haha. |
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TheTrees   United States. Mar 23 2013 21:24. Posts 1592 | | |
| On March 23 2013 18:23 sodarage wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 23 2013 16:56 TheTrees wrote:
| On March 23 2013 15:59 sodarage wrote:
| On March 23 2013 13:31 TheTrees wrote:
Here's the best advice you'll ever read:
Never act like the woman in a relationship.
Based on what you just wrote, you are acting like an emotionally needy woman. The solution? Move on. Go out, have fun. Find some new hobbies and cut contact with her. If she truly wants to be with you, she will let you know. Contacting her will just make it worse.
Good luck. |
I completely agree. thanks
|
Also, completely ignoring women drives them insane. If she texts/calls, give it a few days before you respond. |
The thing is that I can easily cut contact with her and be okay with it, but part of me wants to just man up and be strong enough to talk to her without feeling bad. And I would really like her as a friend too since we've already been doing that for the past 2+ years, but it's hard keeping the friendship and removing any romantic feelings I have for her.
So.. I guess I'll just reply if she ever texts/calls me but go find something to occupy my time to get my mind off of her?
Yes I need to stop being an emotional needy woman right now, haha. |
It's tough. I've been dating the same girl for three years. But, if we broke up that would be it. There's just no way to salvage a friendship (IMO) out of a long-term relationship.
It's perfectly normal to be emotional about the break-up. Just do your best to put it behind you and move on. Like I said, pick up some books/audiobooks and find some new hobbies. Start hitting the gym and re-invent yourself. |
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Raidern   Brasil. Mar 23 2013 21:43. Posts 4243 | | |
rikd was spot on, jsut give it time |
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KeyleK_uk   United Kingdom. Mar 23 2013 22:01. Posts 1687 | | |
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
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poker is soooo much easier when you flop sets | |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 24 2013 03:14. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 23 2013 21:01 KeyleK_uk wrote:
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
should i really ignore her? i feel like just telling her i'm not going to talk to her would be better lol |
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Tensai176   Canada. Mar 24 2013 05:41. Posts 1018 | | |
Don't ignore her imo, just tell her you're not going to talk to her until you's ready. |
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TheTrees   United States. Mar 24 2013 10:08. Posts 1592 | | |
| On March 24 2013 02:14 sodarage wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 23 2013 21:01 KeyleK_uk wrote:
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
should i really ignore her? i feel like just telling her i'm not going to talk to her would be better lol
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If you want to have a shot at her in the future. You 100% ignore her when she contacts you for a few days.
If you want to show how emotionally needy you are, text her and tell her that you're going to ignore her until you're ready.
Here's the bottom line. You aren't together, you aren't friends, and she doesn't want to talk to you right now. It's time to stop thinking about her at all and to not give two fucks. Go do something to get your mind off of her. |
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capaneo   Canada. Mar 24 2013 14:01. Posts 8465 | | |
There is nothing that a half-pound of cocaine and a sixteen-year old girl can't fix. Now that may not be love, but it is all right. |
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In US everyone is happy as long as all the prices are rising. Unless its crude oil - Marc Faber | |
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uiCk   Canada. Mar 24 2013 15:12. Posts 3521 | | |
Aren't you like 40 years old capaneo? |
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I wish one of your guys had children if I could kick them in the fucking head or stomp on their testicles so you can feel my pain because thats the pain I have waking up everyday -- Mike Tyson | |
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capaneo   Canada. Mar 24 2013 15:41. Posts 8465 | | |
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In US everyone is happy as long as all the prices are rising. Unless its crude oil - Marc Faber | |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 27 2013 05:00. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 24 2013 09:08 TheTrees wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 24 2013 02:14 sodarage wrote:
| On March 23 2013 21:01 KeyleK_uk wrote:
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
should i really ignore her? i feel like just telling her i'm not going to talk to her would be better lol
|
If you want to have a shot at her in the future. You 100% ignore her when she contacts you for a few days.
If you want to show how emotionally needy you are, text her and tell her that you're going to ignore her until you're ready.
Here's the bottom line. You aren't together, you aren't friends, and she doesn't want to talk to you right now. It's time to stop thinking about her at all and to not give two fucks. Go do something to get your mind off of her. |
She does want to talk to me though which is why I'd feel bad ignoring her =/. I really need to stop thinking about her though. Picked my guitar back up and playing some LoL haha |
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Svenman87   United States. Mar 28 2013 20:17. Posts 4636 | | |
My ex flew half way across the country to fuck some guy -the so I fucked her best friend. xD but ya I cut all relations to ex's they're always bad news - either dragging you down on purpose or by accident.
Cut the cord - I know exactly how you feel. That ex who flew states away to fuck some dude the week after we called off our engagement. She was my first and we were together fir about 4.5 years. Shit was tough but you find yourself growing up a lot more on your own than you would with her. |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 28 2013 21:03. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 28 2013 19:17 Svenman87 wrote:
My ex flew half way across the country to fuck some guy -the so I fucked her best friend. xD but ya I cut all relations to ex's they're always bad news - either dragging you down on purpose or by accident.
Cut the cord - I know exactly how you feel. That ex who flew states away to fuck some dude the week after we called off our engagement. She was my first and we were together fir about 4.5 years. Shit was tough but you find yourself growing up a lot more on your own than you would with her. |
I'm sorry to hear that =/. Thanks for your advice |
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TheTrees   United States. Mar 29 2013 09:53. Posts 1592 | | |
| On March 27 2013 04:00 sodarage wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 24 2013 09:08 TheTrees wrote:
| On March 24 2013 02:14 sodarage wrote:
| On March 23 2013 21:01 KeyleK_uk wrote:
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
should i really ignore her? i feel like just telling her i'm not going to talk to her would be better lol
|
If you want to have a shot at her in the future. You 100% ignore her when she contacts you for a few days.
If you want to show how emotionally needy you are, text her and tell her that you're going to ignore her until you're ready.
Here's the bottom line. You aren't together, you aren't friends, and she doesn't want to talk to you right now. It's time to stop thinking about her at all and to not give two fucks. Go do something to get your mind off of her. |
She does want to talk to me though which is why I'd feel bad ignoring her =/. I really need to stop thinking about her though. Picked my guitar back up and playing some LoL haha |
Keep us updated...if she wants to talk to you...let her reach out to you. And, like I said, give it a few days before you respond. "Sorry, I've been so busy with ____, how are you?" |
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sodarage   United States. Mar 30 2013 16:59. Posts 13 | | |
| On March 29 2013 08:53 TheTrees wrote:
Show nested quote +
On March 27 2013 04:00 sodarage wrote:
| On March 24 2013 09:08 TheTrees wrote:
| On March 24 2013 02:14 sodarage wrote:
| On March 23 2013 21:01 KeyleK_uk wrote:
ye, do not be there for her emotionally when she needs it if you ever want to have a future with her - just ignore her as much as you can and move on - will make life much easier if she doesnt think you're kinda just waiting for her, can then meet on an even footing in the future and it will be better all around. Trust me I've seen too much of this shit. |
should i really ignore her? i feel like just telling her i'm not going to talk to her would be better lol
|
If you want to have a shot at her in the future. You 100% ignore her when she contacts you for a few days.
If you want to show how emotionally needy you are, text her and tell her that you're going to ignore her until you're ready.
Here's the bottom line. You aren't together, you aren't friends, and she doesn't want to talk to you right now. It's time to stop thinking about her at all and to not give two fucks. Go do something to get your mind off of her. |
She does want to talk to me though which is why I'd feel bad ignoring her =/. I really need to stop thinking about her though. Picked my guitar back up and playing some LoL haha |
Keep us updated...if she wants to talk to you...let her reach out to you. And, like I said, give it a few days before you respond. "Sorry, I've been so busy with ____, how are you?" |
will do. thanks a lot |
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