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sooon2b United States. Apr 12 2009 02:09. Posts 774 | | |
So, I think I am gonna start taking the Roids. My fraternity's softball team is quite good, but we are looking for more of an edge. After chatting with our ex-president about the situation, he suggested steroids. Now, my life's philosophy is to try everything at least once, so of course I said id take them. I chatted with some of the guys and suggested taking them with me. So far I have had mixed answers, none of which were yes. So, hopefully ill start my first cycle soon, my drug dealer should have them soon. I will keep everyone updated, as I am sure you are all as excited as I am.
[This was a semi-April fools joke due to its retarded nature, however I am very serious about trying steroids at some point in my life, just because i'm that gangster.]
Ok, now onto more interesting poker/ballin'/life updates.
I just sat down and worked out some goals I have for the summer. I just cashed out most of my roll, leaving myself with 25 buyins for $50NL, with a set plan on moving up stakes. I am going to have a set financial plan as far as cash outs, expenses, and taxes go. I am thinking about doing some coaching, and would like you guys' input on my proposal. I just purchased one of the most ballin' anti-tilt items out there, which I am super excited about. Ill probably wrap the post up with some random life musings regarding my summer travel plans, health, drugs, school, my fraternity, females, and whatever else I come up with.
Today, while amped up on amphetamines and burning this dank ass Orange Kush, I decided to start organizing my summer, starting with setting goals. I decided to cash out all but 25 buyins for $50NL to ensure I have plenty of cash in hand, and to start a bit of a challenge I have been thinking of. Firstly, I wanted to set a specific number of hands to play from now until August 15th. That number came out to ~185k hands over roughly 125 days. Now, with $1250 online, I decided I want to take a pretty conservative approach in moving up. Starting with $50NL, I am going to play that stake until I profit 50 buyins, at which point I will be allowed to move up to $100NL, and on through the limits. Rakeback, MTT scores, and Coaching will not be included as far as buyins go.
I decided plan a more set, stable cashout process. I will be cashing out my rakeback each month rather than including it in my roll. Also, regarding MTTs, I will be cashing out my net profits at the end of each month as well. If I am in the negative at the end of the month, that negative balance will carry over to the next month and I will cash nothing out. I will be using the 100 buyin rule for any MTTs I play, unless I am staked (If anyone is interested, get at me.) I am doing this to force me to start saving money and planning ahead as far as monthly expenses. I am also keeping strict records of all financial records and receipts so that I can finally file gambling taxes the right way without screwing myself out of money.
As far as coaching goes, I have been giving it some thought lately, seeing it as a way to motivate me to grind more, keep improving my game, and ultimately moving up stakes. I had the idea of charging whatever my hourly wage was over the 50 buyins I won at that limit. Due to my semi-strict game selecting, I would guess my MT ration is around 5. So, over my 25k hand $50NL database, my hourly was around 30$/hour. I would guess through most stakes my hourly will be around 2/3 of a buyin at those stakes. I think this is a pretty decent deal in that I will have a good amount of current experience at that particular stake, and consider myself a fairly decent player and thinker (and I am fairly certain quite a few people could vouch for this.) I think charging your hourly relative to the particular stake you are coaching is pretty fair both ways, wouldn't you agree? Thoughts on this proposal?
Now, onto something much more exciting! I had an extremely baller epiphany the other day after I blew a few candies and cruised a blunt of Northern Lights my buddy got from NC. I often go on blunt cruises before, between, and after poker sessions. I always take a specific back roads route along a protected watershed. Being a protected watershed, only a few people live on this lake, and it is massive. The lake is always on one side of the road, and the other side is usually dense forest. Its absolutely beautiful driving that route at sunrise/sunset. The wildlife, and the thought of fishing a lake that hasn't been fished in 25+ years, calms me, even if i'm not tilted. I have always had this weird thing for fish, whether it be fishing, eating fish, or having pet fish. I decided I had to get a fish tank, with sharks or piranhas. Watching them swim around is super peaceful, and if I ever get tilted, I can just put a fish or other small animal in the tank and watch them devour it, staining the tank blood red, and leaving nothing but skulls and bones once the blood stain settles. I purchased the tank, and all the other essentials for caging a monster, and have it set up on my desk less than 6 inches away from my monitor. Sick, maybe? Baller, absolutely.
As far as random life musings go, I will try to keep it brief. I am working out now that the weather is breaking. I purchased the perfect pull up/push up/ab straps and am doing that routine daily, along with running or biking. I would venture to say that I have gotten a lot stronger faster than any weightlifting routine I have ever been on for sports. I highly recommend trying it out. School is going ok, I am hoping to manage about a 3.5 this semester, but we'll see what happens. I was recently nominated into a few honors societies and an honors fraternity. I dont normally care much about those types of things, but I guess it means I am getting my shit done despite how much I “party”. The fraternity is whatever, nothing exciting has really happened lately. I am still slaying female's on the regular, and still am STD free. As far as drugs go, I have been getting my hands on some pretty awesome bud lately, and recently was informed of the new candy, Opana. Check it out, but I would not recommend ever trying it. Pretty intense stuff though.
Sorry for the long post, if you read all of this, your either a sucker, or a g. Regardless, good lookin' out, deuces,
Pat
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because your that gangster?
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| fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity | |
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The72o Zimbabwe. Apr 12 2009 04:40. Posts 6112 | | | |
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| A Hard Way to Make an Easy Living | |
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sooon2b United States. Apr 12 2009 04:42. Posts 774 | | |
we'll see how stupid I am when I am ripped and huge and have a penis the size of a chipmunk. |
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failsafe United States. Apr 12 2009 05:06. Posts 1037 | | |
i like the fish in the fish tank with the whole peacefulness swimming around thing. as for the steroids i think that's pretty -ev cuz of the whole kidney failure / liver failure / testicles shrinking / man boobs line up. if you're opting to shrink your life expectancy, not to mention your nuts, that's a pretty hardcore sacrifice. you should be able to get a way better return on investment than bigger muscles, veins and perma-tilt. you gotta have some higher preference in the pyramid we call: "i probably can't do this sort of shit very often before it's game." |
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sooon2b United States. Apr 12 2009 07:21. Posts 774 | | |
i thought my sarcasm about the steroids was fairly obvious, guess not :- |
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morph1 Sierra Leone. Apr 12 2009 08:45. Posts 2352 | | |
if ur well educated about steroids and if u have good plan and know what's the best way to use them and ofc u think it's +EV for u then go for it
just be careful and put on one side what u will gain and on other side what could u lose and make judgement on ur own!
i recommend u to stay away from them
i am against using steroids but still there are alot of lies and stupid shit that ppl talk about them (and huge percent doesnt even know what steroids are or how they work) |
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| Always Look On The Bright Side of Life | |
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mrpav.com Canada. Apr 14 2009 11:00. Posts 3069 | | |
Steroids are powerful drugs man, I highly recommend not taking them, or any synthetic testosterone. There are large side effects as well, plus your own bodies testosterone will stop making its own the 1st time you inject. You might be on testosterone replacement therapy for the rest of your life as a result. Also steroids can't replace good training and diet, which are the most important, and clearly you don't have. Steroids aren't the easy way out, change your diet and workout plan first  |
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| ===== mrpav.com ===== | Last edit: 14/04/2009 11:01 |
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