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Xervean United States. Mar 03 2007 00:39. Posts 682 | | |
A long time ago I made a thread called my poker story where I introduced myself to the forum... I decided to update this because I think it is therapeutic in a way and im going to begin blogging.
It all started in June 2005. I was playing starcraft and world of warcraft for my games of choice at the time. One night I was browsing a starcraft community site and there was a post by current 25/50 regular Rekrul. In this post he detailed his poker career up to that point. I was absolutely amazed by the amounts of money he was making. So I did a google search for poker FAQ and began playing the play money tables. Soon after I decided to get brave and deposited 25$ and lost it all in one night. Then the next day I deposited 50$ and lost it all once again and the same day I deposited 50 yet again and lost almost all of it and was left with 3$.. then I ran hot and ran it up to 100$ in about a week and thought I was a poker god. So I decided to go with my friend and play live at the casino. The game was 4/8 fixed limit and I remember being so nervous my hand was shaking when I flopped a set. I dropped about 200$ that night but I still somehow thought I was good at poker and was just unlucky.. So the second I got home I played online on megatilt and went broke. Around this time I made a trip to barnes and noble and bought every poker book that had good reviews on amazon.com and read them all. Now I thought I was really good. So I deposited 50$ and ran it up to 200. My friends got together one night for a home game and I got bad beated some how and went home on tilt.. signed online and went broke again playing highstakes (I was a fixed limit player at the time). I remember my introduction to no limit hold'em well. It was on the 4th of July and I played 1/2NL at the casino which at the time had a buy in cap of 100$. After all was said and done I took home 200$ profit and thought I was the greatest player ever. So obviously the next night I returned and had a really bad beat and then went on mega tilt. There was a rich guy at the table and we both agreed to go all in preflop blind. I did this 4 times and lost every time. This was a pretty bad night for me and I was out of action for a few weeks. So I read a lot and I still had 1.67 on stars which I managed to run up to over 100$. At this time I read harrington on hold'em and re read the no limit section of super system. And I started playing live again and went on a sick run where I won every session for like 2 weeks making like 50-100 a day. I decided to really try and follow bankroll management now and deposited 500$ on pokerstars to play 25nl fully bankrolled. One day I was in the casino and waiting on a table to open and went over to the big game (2/5 NL with no cap on buy in) Amarillo Slim was playing (I live in Tulsa and he was building a golf course nearby or something) So I just had to sit down. Bought in for 1000$ almost all of my bankroll... folded for like an hour basically watching these guys run crazy bluffs not caring about money raising each other 400-500. Then I get KK and raise 50 get re raised 250 and I move all in and get called... he flips over AA and I lose pretty much all my live bankroll. So I decided to give up on live for a while and stuck to online. I was a breakeven player at 25nl for a few months and i finally decided to take like a week off in december and just really read everything I could on poker forums etc.. Then when I came back in mid december It just kind of clicked. And I went from 500-1000 in a week then moved to 50nl and was running so hot I was at 100nl within a week and had close to a 3000 bankroll by christmas. Went on a little downswing to 1800. Then I decided to play live on new years and I won 700$ and the next night I returned and won 400$. With my confidence restored I returned to pokerstars with a vengeance and ran the roll up well over 4000$. I stuck to my limits nicely for a while and joined cardrunners and my bankroll was up to 7k and I cashed out about 2000 and everything seemed great. Then one night I was running bad and my friend messaged me and said hey Elky is playing 3/6NL lets go shortstack and bad beat him! My friend goes broke really fast but I run my 120$ minimum buy in up to 1500$. This is the worst thing that ever happened to me in poker. After this almost everytime I ever ran bad I would play highstakes shortstacking or fullstacking trying to make it back on one hand. Over the months that followed I lost... rebuilt and lost again countless bankrolls ranging from 2k-10k. And I mean COUNTLESS. The only way I managed to survive was I would cash out 2-3k and keep a reserve bankroll in my banking account. Usually I would deposit 1k and build it up to 4-5k then have a 5 buy in downswing go on tilt and play 10/20nl vs H@LL or someone HU and lose it all. This process continued until august 2006. I put 2k on and VOWED to stick to my limits once and for all. I got up to about 3k took down a tournament then built up to 8k playing 1/2.. then had another nice tournament score and played 2/4nl with 12k and ran it up to 25k. I cashed out 10k in november and moved out of my parents house and paid all my rent and bills off for 8 months. Then I took down another nice tournament score online and kept playing 2/4 and winning... so I had about 25k on stars and life was great. Then one night in december I had a relapse and was down about 5 buy ins after some sick beats... and I saw some weak players sitting in a 25/50 table. So I joined and won a few thousand and then Empire2000 sat down. And I decided I was gonna leave since he is a really good player. But before I could leave I pick up an overpair and he busts me with a set. And I go on mega tilt and join 4 tables of 25/50 and proceed to tilt off 20k in about 30 minutes. This left me with about 5k online... so the next night I joined 25/50 again and actually got some revenge on empire2000 stacking him with QQ vs AJ on a J high flop. But a few nights later he got my entire bankroll. So I put about 2500 back on and lost all of that tilting 5/10. I decided to take some time off from poker after this. So in jan 2007 a friend of mine who is a 5/10 and 10/20 player (and lpnetter) offered to stake me 3k for 100nl if I promised to send him my hand histories and stuff so he could make sure I wasnt playing over my bankroll. Within 2 weeks I paid him back twice what he sent me. I thought I was a new man... but I went broke 2 days later same story. He refused to stake me again saying that I will never learn unless I grind up from the bottom playing lowstakes until my fingers "bleed".
And this brings us to the present. Looking back I would say I have blown well over 100,000$ that was won from small to med stakes games and mtts. I have SERIOUS tilting issues that I am trying my best to overcome. If I wasnt a huge degenerate retard I would be extremely wealthy and be living a wonderful and carefree life. I am so greatful that Brian Townsend joined cardrunners. In his first video he said that "you need to take responsiblity for your results. Because at the end of your life when you look back at your poker career your results are based off your decisions." When he said that it just really hit me so hard, and I realized I am exactly where I am not because of bad luck but because of the decisions I have made. My dream has always been to play in the highest stakes games on the internet and be over bankrolled. I know I have the ability to do this, the only thing holding me back is my anger, greed and impatience. I am currently playing 25nl on pokerstars and will be moving up to 50nl very soon. I have decided that this will be my absolute last time rebuilding a bankroll from nothing. Im ready to focus and take responsibility for my results and begin seriously analyzing my play after every session. I have decided to start a blog where I will set goals and post my results day to day... I think this will help keep me on the right track.
Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed hearing about my fucked up poker career lol
STAY TUNED
(edit: Also Pooruser has taken probably 10k+ off of me HU when im tilting highstakes... I felt bad leaving him out)
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| | Last edit: 03/03/2007 01:06 |
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lucifer Sweden. Mar 03 2007 01:43. Posts 5955 | | |
I wish I had a cool stakerfriend. |
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| On February 19 2009 22:21 Confedrate wrote: i dont get it | Last edit: 03/03/2007 01:44 |
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Verbloten Australia. Mar 03 2007 02:43. Posts 1889 | | |
yeh interesting read - some additional paragraphs woulda helped my eyes - but i managed ctrl-scroll-wheel-down 
i am the absolute total opposite of you - so it's quite amazing to read your story. I would do anything to have what u had and continue to build it. Maybe i am so conservative because i value money more? I have masses of real life debts (440K approximately) and therefore take my poker bankroll very seriously - at the same time my BR doesn't move much. I think i might be a break even player which is kinda dissapointing but i don't get a lot of time to play (maybe 1K hands a week).
GL on your return run - try and appreciate your good fortune at being a good player and control your emotions - tilt is weak. weak is bad.
GL HF
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iop Sweden. Mar 03 2007 03:25. Posts 4951 | | |
good luck man,
i liked this part: "lso Pooruser has taken probably 10k+ off of me HU when im tilting highstakes... I felt bad leaving him out" |
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| Milkman lol i didnt spend half a thousand on a phone so i could play it cool and be all stealth | |
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PokerDoc88 Australia. Mar 03 2007 04:23. Posts 3527 | | |
Good luck dude, just always keep these words in mind when you play:
A player who has A+ grade bankroll management but C grade poker skills will still go further than some one who has C grade bankroll management with A+ poker skills.
You know as well as any one that serious players rely on having large bankrolls to absorb the high variance in a game like poker, and survive to profit in the long run.
It sounds to me like you have the ability to play the game at even high levels, so now all you gotta do is work on your tilt control and just be happy with the knowledge that you do know how to win in the long run. |
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nicksson Sweden. Mar 03 2007 04:36. Posts 4662 | | |
| | On March 03 2007 00:43 lucifer wrote:
I wish I had a cool stakerfriend. |
yah me2 
and good luck with rebuilding! |
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| Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had? | |
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Critterer United Kingdom. Mar 03 2007 06:54. Posts 5337 | | |
good read, but try using some paragraphs! |
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| LudaHid: dam.ned dam.ned dam.ned. LudaHid: dam.ned northwooden as..hole | |
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Trey United States. Mar 03 2007 08:12. Posts 5616 | | | |
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Loco Canada. Mar 03 2007 08:39. Posts 21015 | | |
heh sounds like my beginnings. Playing with 1 or 2 buy ins at NL 200/400/600. I learned faster than you though. |
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| fuck I should just sell some of my Pokemon cards, if no one stakes that is what I will have to do - lostaccount | |
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XeliN United Kingdom. Mar 03 2007 10:02. Posts 2365 | | |
can relate to you loads only i with less ammounts of money, discovering the short term benefits playing underolled can have has fucked me up poker wise and like you if i take bad beats or losing sessions i frequently try to nullify them playing underolled, luckily i have less cash than you so havent had quite the swings you hve but yeh it comes from greed, arrogence, no value of money and impatience (mostly the last two) and im trying to overcome that cos again like you i think im more than good enough to make reasonable ammounts at poker at least at low --> mid stakes |
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| Steal City: if u want to get good at sex u need to read books. Its just like poker, u need to read | Last edit: 03/03/2007 10:03 |
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baxteru Romania. Mar 03 2007 11:37. Posts 567 | | |
That's really fabulous haha |
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72o Brasil. Mar 05 2007 10:13. Posts 90 | | | |
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| 7-2o is my favourite hand.. I Never lost an all in pre flop when the other guy had 7-2o, | |
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Sweden. Mar 03 2007 01:18. Posts 7243
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