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i got kicked out of my house
last night i came home drunk off my socks at around 1 AM and my parents were up and waiting for me. they've been on the edge for the past few months because for years i've been just fucking around with my life not taking anything seriously and it's been getting to them, especially after my college scholarship got cut off last semester. it's understandable because i graduated high school 3rd in my class and made near perfect scores on the SATs and had an excellent track record in high school (soccer team captain, president of the math organization, student government, all that jazz) but chose to not go out of state. i had applied to Harvard and that was the only school that i applied to. when i got waitlisted there, i had no choice but to apply late to the local state university and i got in with a full ride + yearly allowance of like ~5k.
anyways, i got seriously involved with this one girl and i absolutely did not put in ANY work in college. i coasted for a few semesters getting decent grades in all the elementary classes by just skipping all my classes except during exams, but after i broke up with that girl, went to korea and learned alcohol, shit just hit the fan and everything just came to an epic life downswing. i basically stopped going to all my classes and even stopped taking exams FFS. every finals week i drank a ton and took my exams drunk as shit.
so that was junior year. i failed multiple classes and failed to keep up with the 24 credit hour requirement, which resulted in my scholarships getting pulled. my parents pulled out for me though and they paid for tuition last semester, and my grades improved, since i played very little poker and actually did most of my assignments.
anyways, last night, i came home piss drunk and ended up having to talk to my parents drunk. the thing is, my dad is a minister at a local church and i've been raised up in a very religious background all my life (asian upbringing + christian background - you can imagine what it's like). he asked me whether or not i remembered the scripture that we read a few nights back during our family discussion: "Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit" (Ephesians 5:18).
i told him yes.
he then asked me whether i was rebelling or something.
i nodded.
and then he pointed out how i wasn't just rebelling against my parents, but how i was rebelling against God.
i thought for a little while, and then i nodded in agreement.
he didn't say much afterwards. he simply told me to pack my things and leave. he also told me to return the tuition for this upcoming semester and do whatever i'd like with my life.
a lot of this religious stuff is probably over your head because i know most of the people here are really cynical or skeptical about religion, but it's something that' i've grown up with most of my life and it's an issue i've been struggling with for a while. i've done my share of spiritual searching but i have yet to find some sort of conclusion about God. at one point, i even fasted for 7 days for this very reason.
basically, i'm fed up with keeping up with this half-assed religious facade. i've only been pretending to be a good pastor's kid while the rest of me lived in hypocrisy, equivocation, and doubt.
my mother and my brother, as well as i, agreed that this was something that was absolutely necessary in turning things around in my life. i'm staying at my friend's dormitory for a little while. my brother offered to help me with tuition so i can finish my last semester of college. in the meantime, i'll be filling my schedule with uninhibited grinding (which was never before possible due to the circumstances of living at home) and studying for the CFA.
my car was totalled last week, so my friend is taking me down to New Orleans where i can play some live poker and build up some funds with which i can live for the next few weeks. my girlfriend lives there and i haven't seen her in 15 days. i got her an iphone for christmas and i'll finally get to deliver that to her tomorrow.
oh, and in other news, i made six buyins at NL50 playing 32/28 over 1k hands last night. donking flops worked wonders. it opens up so many possibilities through which you can manipulate the hand. you set yourself up for multibarrel bluffs, cheap semibluffs, and it gives your opponents the opportunity to spazz out eventually when they realize you're donking a pretty big range... they all of a sudden want to play a lot of big pots with me lol.
and i just got back from an amazing trip in Canada. snowboarding is FUN AS SHIT and i hit up the black diamond slopes by the end of the first day and had the TIME OF MY FUCKING LIFE brusing bones and internally bleeding on my way down LOL. i hope to return as soon as i can.
anyways, this is an exciting new stage in my life and i hope to update you all with more interesting news in subsequent posts.
GL fellas!
Jino
EDIT: thanks for the support everyone, much <3
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| | Last edit: 07/01/2009 21:42 |
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damn that's pretty crazy
hope you run good in new orleans so you can live for a while |
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good luck dude, hoping for the best. |
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Uptown . Jan 07 2009 21:32. Posts 3557 | | |
RUN FOR SNE IMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Good luck man, live strongggg |
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Silver_nz New Zealand. Jan 07 2009 21:34. Posts 5647 | | |
lol life.
your dad sounds like a pretty reasonable guy, will probably do you good to be out on your own for a while though
I really doubt you will be able to go pro on poker unless you are already overrolled and on top of the games.
could go on an epic soulsearching journey working short term jobs though! |
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| | On January 07 2009 20:34 Silver)Z( wrote:
lol life.
your dad sounds like a pretty reasonable guy, will probably do you good to be out on your own for a while though
I really doubt you will be able to go pro on poker unless you are already overrolled and on top of the games.
could go on an epic soulsearching journey working short term jobs though! |
yeah this is certainly not my intention
my dad is like the most awesome guy i know |
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Sometime life throws us nasty curve balls, and it makes us much stronger |
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| How you want it, bars or bullets? | |
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SIG1 United States. Jan 07 2009 21:47. Posts 651 | | | |
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| | On January 07 2009 20:47 Seobombisgay wrote:
i bet u ur korean |
fml |
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lebowski Greece. Jan 07 2009 21:58. Posts 9205 | | |
| | On January 07 2009 20:37 collegesucks wrote:
Show nested quote +
On January 07 2009 20:34 Silver)Z( wrote:
lol life.
your dad sounds like a pretty reasonable guy, will probably do you good to be out on your own for a while though
I really doubt you will be able to go pro on poker unless you are already overrolled and on top of the games.
could go on an epic soulsearching journey working short term jobs though! |
yeah this is certainly not my intention
my dad is like the most awesome guy i know
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hmm this blog entry seemed to me like it got more optimistic halfway till the end,which was surprising with the way it started.
Anyway you obviously like your dad, but it's not like the greatest method of all time to stop your son from screwing his future with the argument that the Ephesians passage said so. Just my 2 cents.
I also don't see how what you were doing is rebelling against god,did you say that because you were drunk? |
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| new shit has come to light... a-and... shit! man... | Last edit: 07/01/2009 21:59 |
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Exhilarate United States. Jan 07 2009 22:02. Posts 5453 | | |
damn dude you applied to harvard, and got waitlisted?
you got tons of potential man |
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lebowski Greece. Jan 07 2009 22:03. Posts 9205 | | |
if you find that your parents are suffocating you with their religious beliefs and they are reasonable people you can always point out that religion is about free will and it is a private matter and that they shouldn't be a burden because they'll have the opposite effects from what they desire etc
What could they possibly say after that,it's not that people doing this have really thought it through. |
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| new shit has come to light... a-and... shit! man... | |
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Baalim Mexico. Jan 07 2009 22:12. Posts 34304 | | |
jesus christ... son of a korean minister, well u know what hell is like so the gutter wont feel that bad.
If i were you i would go to talk with my parents, not to come back just to explain them wtf is going on, just tell them what u just wrote here, that you are simply struggling with your perception of god and religion, that you dont need their religious guidance right now that you will come to your own conclusions by yourself, and if they take you back or not well thats up to them.
Its probably their way to "straighten you out", something that can be avoided by speaking your mind to them, unless they are incredible douchebags. |
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| Ex-PokerStars Team Pro Online | |
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fml never post again when im drunk |
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| | Last edit: 08/01/2009 06:08 |
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fml never post again when im drunk |
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| | Last edit: 08/01/2009 06:08 |
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fml never post again when im drunk |
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| | Last edit: 08/01/2009 06:08 |
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props, life can be pretty fucked up some times |
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| rockman255: its not easy being superman U N0 MySteeZ: mega man. rockman255: same thing U N0 MySteeZ: no | |
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lol how does this entry ever relate to rekrul.
anyways, i think baal your suggestion is totally right but i'm not in a hurry to return home just yet. but it's def important for me to get some of this out to them since all i gave them last night were just a couple of nods and "yes"s.
and yeah lebowski maybe it's true that i've really been suffocating with all this but it was just so unnoticeable you know? this is how i grew up, and just not being around church is just awkward and totally strange, even though at the same time it's liberating to feel that it's actually up to me to make the choices according to what i want. |
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seatown12 United States. Jan 07 2009 23:48. Posts 1193 | | |
Sounds like you have been dealing with some big decisions trying to figure out who you are and what you want out of life. This could either be the best or worst thing to happen to you during this process, but the good news is it's pretty much up to you. Not sure going to the casino is the best plan though, you should probably try to line up a part time job or something so you have a stable income to fall back on while you finish your last semester and only play poker when you can, and more for learning purposes than making money. In the meantime unfortunately snowboarding trips and iPhones have just become unjustifiable expenses. Good luck man I hope everything works out for the best. |
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| Im like a motherfucking bulletproof tiger | |
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| | On January 07 2009 22:48 TedHastings wrote:
Sounds like you have been dealing with some big decisions trying to figure out who you are and what you want out of life. This could either be the best or worst thing to happen to you during this process, but the good news is it's pretty much up to you. Not sure going to the casino is the best plan though, you should probably try to line up a part time job or something so you have a stable income to fall back on while you finish your last semester and only play poker when you can, and more for learning purposes than making money. In the meantime unfortunately snowboarding trips and iPhones have just become unjustifiable expenses. Good luck man I hope everything works out for the best. |
good points. thanks.
although, those were expenses incurred prior to this situation. |
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| | Last edit: 07/01/2009 23:52 |
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