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qwerty67890 New Zealand. Aug 05 2007 10:46. Posts 14026 | | |
So me and my mate are coming home from the bar when we decide to commit some crime.
We were pretty fuckin smashed so it seemed like a good idea. Then i see the campus security car drive past and i leg it off into the bushes, my friend was further down the road.
He got persued home by security guard then he bailed into some hedges and made it home safe.
However, i was about to take a bad beat in getting home.
Im walking down like 20m from my house. Cop car pulls up - fuck.
Cop 1: Quite young, athletic looking. He was calm when he was questioning me although he was using leading questions about crime which i didnt like.
He asks for my drivers licence so i give it to him. I only have a UK licence so its got my UK address on it.
Our conversation went something like this:
Cop: Where do you live?
Me: Sorry?
Cop: Where do you live?
Me: All my info is on my licence
Cop: Thats your UK address, whats your address here?
Me: All my info is on my licence.
There were now like 4 cops on the scene, 2 cop wagons and the campus security guard
ENTER COP 2!
Cop 2: Fat old cunt tried to pull the whole "tough cop" routine on me. He hears my conversation and runs over and starts yelling in my face
I continue to respond with "All my info is on my licence"
cop2: DO YOU WANNA BE ARRESTED? WHATS YOUR ADDRESS!?!?
me: all my info is on my licence......
i get thrown against the car LOL
he puts the handcuffs on me and then shouts "WHATS YOUR HOME ADDRESS"
I just look at him and he gives up. 
I get put into the back of the car (rear passenger side). Im sitting there and the cops are outside (rear drivers side)
I decide that I could probably make a break for it - so i shuffle along and undo my seatbelt and prepare to escape to victory. Unofrtunatly cop 1 saw me shuffling around and sat in the car with me.
He was filling out forms and i decided it was time to abuse him.
me: I used to bully kids like you when i was at school
cop: oh really?
me: yeah i bet you couldnt fuckin wait to become a cop so you get some power
cop: youre just a loser (i believe this statement to be false)
me: your the loser, id have beaten you up at school and chucked your backpack in the bin
I think then i started to just talk shit to him when he read my rights so hopfully theyd read it out in court. I remember telling him to write down "Rainkhan is good at basketball" but i dunno if he bothered.
I cant remember where the conversation went from there but i remember telling him to beat me up and that he could hit me in the face and stuff lol
So - back to the po po station. They lead me in and im fuckin around still
Theyre getting my possessions off me and im being an arse
First they questioned me about where i got $30 in $2 coins. I think i told them i robbed somebody at first, then told them Id won it on the slot machines (truth) coz i run so hot
The cop couldnt undo my belt buckle and i refused to tell him how to do it - i just told him whether he was hot or cold.
When my belt came off i wiggled about so my trousers fell down around my ankles then proceeded to gyrate around infront of the cops with my tongue out pussy lickin' st<x>yle.
Then I started to french kiss the glass and tongueing the holes you have to talk through as the cop was sorting out my stuff infront of me
Being that i wasnt getting enough attention - i spat through the little hole. Got some good veloicity on it and managed to hit the lockers
Got shouted at a bit by the other cops then they decided it was time to scare me
Cop: Were gonna put you in with George
me: sweet
cop: george doesnt like white guys - hes gonna have so much fun with you tonight
me: all good man lets go
I get led to georges cell and they open the door. Hes some huge fuck and he was fast asleep. I didnt care and i went to walk in. Naturally they pulled me away and took me to my own cell.
It had all the mod cons youd expect. Toilet, sink, cups, 2 beds, matress.
I coma out and wake up and ive got a free breakfast from them.
I eat that and bang on the doors some more trying to get them to set me free but they tell me i have to wait
Then they bring me out, take my fingerprints and give me a mug shot. Then i get given my shit back.
I ask for a lift home but they dont oblige  so i walk around for a bit then find a bus stop and get the bus home.
Court this thursday. should be fun.
brag: have now done time in the joint
beat: criminal record
variance: didnt get shanked
Does anyone else on the site have a record?
liquidcriminals.net
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FrinkX United States. Aug 05 2007 11:00. Posts 7562 | | |
do they even know it was you who did that to the security car?
seems like if u were just nice nothing woulda happened lol |
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| bitch on a pension suck my dong | |
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qwerty67890 New Zealand. Aug 05 2007 11:08. Posts 14026 | | |
security had called the cops and given them my description
i didnt snitch on my pal and then they knew something was up. this coupled with being drunk made for a situation that was only gonna end in a cell.
If id given them my address id prolly have been sweet lol |
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Trey United States. Aug 05 2007 11:10. Posts 5616 | | |
This is the coolest story ever |
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ggplz Sweden. Aug 05 2007 11:21. Posts 16784 | | | |
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| if poker is dangerous to them i would rank sports betting as a Kodiak grizzly bear who smells blood after you just threw a javelin into his cub - RaiNKhAN | |
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Silver_nz New Zealand. Aug 05 2007 11:26. Posts 5647 | | |
| | On August 05 2007 10:21 ggplz wrote:
dumb |
but awesome lol. Who wants to be good? this is the way to live a full and exiting life. hahahah |
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XeliN United Kingdom. Aug 05 2007 11:43. Posts 2365 | | |
| | On August 05 2007 10:21 ggplz wrote:
dumb |
sounds like you made things worse for yourself by acting like an immature faggot. Grow Up |
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| Steal City: if u want to get good at sex u need to read books. Its just like poker, u need to read | |
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Murray Finland. Aug 05 2007 11:44. Posts 623 | | |
what crime did you commit? :D |
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qwerty67890 New Zealand. Aug 05 2007 11:46. Posts 14026 | | | |
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TimDawg  United States. Aug 05 2007 11:57. Posts 10197 | | | |
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| online bob is actually a pretty smart person, not at all like the creepy fucker that sits in the sofa telling me he does nasty shit to me when im asleep - pinball | |
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| | On August 05 2007 10:57 TimDawg wrote:
pics of george plz |
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| please god if i win this hand...I WILL GLORIFY YOUR NAME !!! | |
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Ket United Kingdom. Aug 05 2007 12:34. Posts 8665 | | |
| | On August 05 2007 10:43 XeliN wrote:
sounds like you made things worse for yourself by acting like an immature faggot. Grow Up
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yeah no shit. this is not cool byrne |
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MayZerG United Kingdom. Aug 05 2007 12:50. Posts 2123 | | |
This was the FUNNIEST story i ever read, thankyou!!!
''I remember telling him to write down "Rainkhan is good at basketball" but i dunno if he bothered.''
OMG!!!! ROFL!!!! |
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| I like to hold all the nuts - CrownRoyal | |
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Kapol Poland. Aug 05 2007 13:03. Posts 4696 | | |
You are an idiot.
Over'n out. |
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| BIBLE (Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth) | Last edit: 05/08/2007 13:03 |
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Red9 Canada. Aug 05 2007 13:28. Posts 7447 | | | |
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| I will grind you into dust. | |
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Sheitan Canada. Aug 05 2007 13:56. Posts 4217 | | |
it's not cool, it's stupid ... |
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| Odds are exactly 50%, either happens or it doesnt | |
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milkman United States. Aug 05 2007 15:24. Posts 5719 | | |
just cuz 10 nerds dont have the balls to talk shit to cops or get drunk and break shit say its not cool.. dont beleive them, it is very cool.. when the man decides to fuck with ya, u gotta stick it to um.. im not a fan of spitting or being that outa control. But still pretty bad ass, shit like telling um to write down khans good at basketball is awesome..
ive got a juvi record from when i was like 10 or 11.. and almost got the fbi called on me when i was 17 but so far no real record. (knock on wood) |
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| Its hard to make a easy buck legally, its impossible to make a easy buck morally. | |
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Ballad126 United States. Aug 05 2007 15:29. Posts 932 | | |
I once got sent the principal's office
I was like "FUNK YOU MAN" and he was all "WHAT THE FRUIT IS GOING ON HERE" |
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XeliN United Kingdom. Aug 05 2007 16:00. Posts 2365 | | |
nah your right milkman our general struggle in life is to cause criminal damage then be wankers when were caught doing it, honestly i dont know who i have less respect for, byrnesam for doing it or you for saying its "cool" its not cool its the actions of 12 year olds go die you pathetic peices of "cool" shit |
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| Steal City: if u want to get good at sex u need to read books. Its just like poker, u need to read | |
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| Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had? | |
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ToT)MidiaN( United Kingdom. Aug 05 2007 16:39. Posts 5070 | | |
lols interesting beat/bad/variance conclusion |
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| One day good. One day bad. And some days, even hope | |
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muckv Belgium. Aug 05 2007 17:11. Posts 12 | | |
lol, you are a real retard |
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qwerty67890 New Zealand. Aug 05 2007 22:49. Posts 14026 | | | |
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spets1 Australia. Aug 06 2007 06:23. Posts 2179 | | |
lol wtf, most retarded shit ive ever read...
if that was real ur a dumb arse |
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| | On August 05 2007 21:49 byrnesam wrote:
nit life guys |
you are just lucky you arent a nigga |
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| please god if i win this hand...I WILL GLORIFY YOUR NAME !!! | |
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chris United States. Aug 06 2007 11:59. Posts 5507 | | |
post pic of mushot please |
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| 5 minute showers are my 8 minute abs. - Neilly | |
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iandeezy United States. Aug 07 2007 01:24. Posts 317 | | |
Judges normally don't give a shit about people without a previous record but when he gets the police report he's going to tear you a new one... Like when I got my first MIP for pissing in the middle of a street, so drunk forgot to pack it back in and pissed on the cops leg while talking shit when he was getting my info. I would have gotten a slap on the wrist and a fine but instead got an extra day in jail and supervised probation. Real jail, which you will probably experience soon, is much worse than the drunk tank my friend... have fun. |
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