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Mariuslol Norway. Feb 07 2010 05:55. Posts 4742 | | |
Finally done with the last part of the series, here are my notes.
Tiltlessness
"Tiltnessness has no end point."
We do that by reducing our suffering.
From Tommy's book
I was a great tilter. I knew all the different kinds. I could do steaming tilt, simmering tilt, too loose tilt, too tight tilt, too aggressive tilt, too passive tilt, playing too high tilt, playing too long tilt, playing too tired tilt, entitlement tilt, annoyed tilt, injustice tilt, frustration tilt, sloppy tilt, revenge tilt, underfunded tilt, overfunded tilt, shame tilt, distracted tilt, scared tilt, envy tilt, this-is-the-worst-pizza-I've-ever-had tilt, I-just-got-showed-a-bluff tilt, and of course, the classic: I-gotta-get-even tilt, and I-only-have-so-much-time-to-lose-this-money-tilt, also known as demolition tilt.
The actual cause of the tilt is the attachment to the thing we lost. It isn't the loss in itself.
More from Tommy's book
I'd tilt, and I'd look back on my tiltings, and I started seeing cycles, and then cycles withing cycles, and before long, I started to see my entire poker future as a ceaseless fluctuation between tight and tilt.
The grand delusion
"The grand delusion is that external things are making us unhappy, and that external things will make us happy."
*If only I had the next thing, I'll be happy, if I didn't lose that I'd be happy.*
"It's all about attachment."
- That's why poor people who have nothing is way happier than people who have tons of stuff.
- There's no amount of accumulation that is going to give us peace of mind. It simply can't happen that way. And the delusion is that we go through our whole lives, despite the evidence, still believing that if only I had that one more thing, I would be happy.
"Totally about attachment and desire."
- All fears are attached to attachment.
A big day in my career was the day I realized that tomorrow I would still be a tilter.
The grand premise
That we want to be happier than we are now, and we want to be more deeply happy, more often.
More from Tommy's book
I figured if I ever went broke at poker, it wouldn't be because my best wasn't good enough to keep me afloat. It'd be because my worst was bad enough to sink me.
bankrolls and bodies
"If only we could just live our bankroll, every single second, no matter what it was, the amount of agony we would let go of is H U G E."
Defining suffering
- If you slam your hand in the car door, that's pain, nerves sending signals to your brain causing you pain. That is not suffering.
- The stuff that gets stirred up in your head, "this is going to hurt for a week" that's suffering
* Suffering is an affliction*
Countless different kinds of suffering, here are some examples:
- Worry
- regret
- fear
- anger
- stress
- dissatisfaction
- annoyance
- conflict
- panic
- unease
- I'm to fat
- I'm to skinny
- regret
- I'm too busy
- inadequate
- nervousness
- aggravation
Ignorance, in regular language the way we use it, it means lack of knowledge, not knowing.
In the Buddhist teachings, it's a word that gets used along the lines of delusion, but not intended that way.
The root word for it is "ignore". Good to look at it as ignore - ance, not pay attention
Emptiness
Tiltnessness
metaphors / tuning your instrument
- Look at yourself like the instrument, in the morning, take a few minuts to meditate and tune yourself, or when you take a break from a session, or just in the middle of a session, if just for a few seconds.
(The metaphor is, if you have an orchestra, they will sound like shit, traffic noise, if they don't tune themselves before they start.)
Tiltlessness
a few metaphors / water in a lake
- Think of your mind like the water in a lake, on the surface, it's sometimes smooth, sometimes it's wind, and it causes waves. Or if a big rock comes into the lack, it causes a big splash.
- But the really cool thing is, is right under the surface of the lake, it's always smooth, it's always calm. All you have to do it still yourself, calm yourself, and connect with that part of yourself.
Tiltlessness
a few metaphors / Surfing
- Another way to breathe, pretend you're surfing the breath.
Tiltlessness
a few metaphors / Tilted poker is like crooked teeth
- It's not your fault, and it can be fixed.
* What it comes from, is the entire sum of human suffering, accumulation of the non mindfulness, that is the cause of tilt*
- It will take some time, small changes, but in the end of it all, you'll smile a lot more.
More from Tommy's book
Tilt has many causes and kinds, but it has only one effect. It makes us play bad.
Best Tilt Inducers
- Running bad
- Playing bad
Probably the top two tilt inducers.
If no one is tiltless then everyone can tilt less.
How to handle bad beats
Move your awareness out a level, from your absorption with the injustice and the unfairness, and all the other thoughts.
And it's all about awareness, it's about being aware of the actual mental activity in your mind, and calling it what it is, and saying the whole reality:
The card came. I lost the pot. This is causing my mind to stir up...
Playing bad
- such a huge cause of suffering, living in the past, beating ourself up, gigantic heap of suffering we go through, and we keep coming back to, it's my fault.
The way to ease this suffering, is similar to before, keep peeling layers of the union, and accepting that reality
If you focus on doing your best, if you think doing your best involved
- Sleeping right
- Eating right
- Training right
- Sitting upright
- Whatever it might be, to ease the suffering of playing bad, practice on playing your best. This will ease your suffering, as long as you were focused, doing your best. Then you won't have regret.
Perception is reality
More from Tommy's book
Tilt is anything less than your utmost. Tilt is suboptimalness. By defining tilt from teh top down, we can draw a line for any player that cleanly divides his tilt from his non-tilt.
The Blame Game
- When you blame other people, it's causing suffering in your brain.
*The act of blaming* is the thing that causes it, not the thing that's been done. It's your fault you can't control your mind.
- If you should blame anyone, blame yourself for blaming someone else. Don't stir up the surface of your lake, it's just mental noise
You don't blame people for anything. Ever.
(Start with yourself.)
Roll all blames into one. (Just take it all on yourself if you have to.)
If you know 100% that you're unjustly accused, and you know you're not wrong. Can you not react to that ?
You suck it in, and you don't spit it back out.
This is the greatest test, you just absorb it in. This is unbelievably awesome.
The more right you are, by not saying "No it wasn't me, blabla" The stronger you get.
The Blame Game
it just never ends
it never ends, you will be suffering from the blame game, forever
Until you make a conscious effort to not blame, saying it isn't enough, you have to do the work.
Internet irritants
Lost connection:
This is the landscape you play in, this is the world you play in. Just breathe your way through it. It'd be the same as playing basketball but hate the size of the ball.
Computer wait time:
Instead of being anxious, wishing it to speed up, just transform it, sit up straight, take a breath. Make it into a positive. Calm yourself, tune yourself.
Internet helpers:
- Written reminders
- Staying busy
- Taking breaks (Sick important)
- Taking days off
- Playing drills. (Where you force yourself to play more, even if it's just 10 minutes.) (For people who wants to play more, ur not playing to earn money, just to get more play.)
- Sit up and breathe
- Finger tilt, when the big pot comes up, train yourself, to put your hand in your lap, give yourself a chance to get a little bit of space so the instant action doesn't happen.
Running bad
"Running bad is just an idea, it's just a thought."
One of the ways to overcome this huge burden, the idea that we're running bad, is letting go of the past, it's just ideas, thoughts.
The act of coming back to the present tense is the cure for running bad.
More from Tommy's book
Tilt is all about you.
If you think you should have taken the day off, or if you think you should have played at different stakes, or if you think you made a bad raise, then you tilted. Only you know when you knew better.
Last thing about running bad
When you manage to get to the point of where losing doesn't hurt, that in itself is a higher level of joy, which is just wonderful. You don't get the suffering you would normally have, + when you realize you feel like this, that will make you feel great.
Living in the moviement
When you are watching a movie, where is your mind? What is your eyes and your ears doing?
- Movies serves as suffering remedy, because they force the mind to be in the present tense. Proof, that coming in the present is pain relif.
- When you do it with drugs etc, you go below awareness, the more pure better way of doing it, is doing it yourself, without substance, without the movie.
Taming the mind
"In the same way we have arms and legs, we all have the racing mind."
* Discursive thought, out of control, cluttered, rambling*
Meditation: It's not what you think.
- If you meditate you will suffer less, just the same way as, if you're overweight, and you eat less calories, you will lose weight.
It can be easily tested, all you have to try is, do it.
"The benefit is a reduction in unhappiness that will permeate every aspect of your life."
Yoga
- In music you have two components, you have rhythm, and notes. You can make rhythm without the notes, but not the other way around.
So in Yoga, there's the stretching, and there's the breathing
Breathing is to rhythm as stretching is to notes.
If you do the stretching without the breathing, it's just stretching.
Breathing is the essential act of Yoga.
Bandaids and cures
- For all of the bad habits you have at poker, there's things you can do to fix it right now, and there's cures.
(For instance, keep telling bad beats, having to tell bad beats, but you feel bad afterward.)
- As for the cure, for stopping the telling the bad beat stories, is not having those thoughts in your mind. Taming your mind.
Simply thoughts gushing out of your mouth, but if they're not in your mind, they won't even come up.
"It always comes back to taming the mind and managing what's in there."
Compassion
- We're normally thinking of compassion as feeling sorry for someone, pity, it's hard to describe it without using those words. (Like walking past a bum on the street.)
- Our compassion seem to be tied to circumstances, like if someone rich or famous fuck up, we react totally different. like (Hey, lol, look at that fucktard, like we judge them.)
The buddhist branch of compassion kinda look like this:
- Everyone suffers, and everyone suffers from the same reasons and in the same way. And one of the effect of suffering is violence, cruelty, the list goes on. The ways we have of inflicting wounds on other.
- In the buddhist version, you see the violence, see that's wrong, the more in need and worthy they are for compassion.
From Tommy's book
We play our new game, and the bad times come, and we remember to follow our breathing. In, and out. In, and out. By doing so, we set aside our thoughts about what went wrong, and we step away from our thoughts about what might go wrong, and for that moment, when those thoughts are gone, so too is unhappiness. By eliminating the past, and eliminating the future, we give ourselves this present. We will practice this process of elimination, using our new game, and it will become for us a process of illumination. Let us play.
The wind up
The difference between ignorance and stupidity is, ignorance is when you don't know, stupidity is when you refuse to act on the knowledge you receive.
And there you have it.
The End
Or the beginning?
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LemOn[5thF] Czech Republic. Feb 07 2010 09:20. Posts 15163 | | | |
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Mariuslol Norway. Feb 07 2010 09:38. Posts 4742 | | |
Made me sweath, took me 2 hours to understand my hand writing, and put the notes in a way that it semi made sense lol. |
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