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June was a lifechanging month |
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PplusAD Germany. Jul 01 2007 09:00. Posts 7182 | | |
Jhea lots of stuff has happend.
For all of you who are interested in Poker only
_ skip the text to the end of the blog for a look at the graph_.
As the topic allready indicates June had a major impact on my life.
In the middle of the month out of nowhere i got Tinnitus on both my ears.
The high-pitched whistle that just will never stop 
The cause is not totally clear since there are some factors that could be the reason.
There are over 800 causes that could lead to Tinnitus
In my case the 3 likley reasons were
1) High Intensity SPort training combined with lack of sleep.
2.) I got punched on the ear quite alot while fighting
3.) 2 of my computer fans got quite loud and anyoing over the years and i spend almost 10+h in front of the PC on saturday and sunday. This could have been stressfull for my ears combined with the lack of sleep and the preassure to work concentrated on University stuff in front of a noise machine. ( My PC)
I first noticed the Tinnitus on a Sunday evening.
I have to admit this stuff is nasty and i was seriously thinking about killing myself just to get some silence after the Tinnitus managed to stay for the 4th day.
It drives you mad to heare a high-pitched whistle 24h a day.
I visited a Doktor and i got some medicine and isolated myself from any noise.
No TV ,No Computer, no radio,no pohne calls
I didnt go to university ( but participated in the tests)
I tryed to sleep all day ( which was hella diffcult) and besindes that i did nothing than read some University sc<x>ripts and wait for the Tinnitus to end.
Id say i have taken a look inside what hell could be.
Endless torture. A Pain the just goes on 24h a day and will never stop not even a single minute.
ON a side not i managed to pass all Tests with exscellent results ! LOL, Yeha , reading university sc<x>ripts was the only thing i was able to do all day besides of trying to sleep ...
SO i rocked my tests pretty hardcore and even managed to score 1,0 in one while i did pretty good 2,X in the others. ( scala is 1,0 best 6,0 worst)
This has brought me to the conclusion that University is actually not that difficult if i d only concentrate enough.
I Also bought new silencers cause every high frequent noise drives me mad since my Tinnitus experience.
Zalman-CU for the Geforce7600GT <--- excellent !!!!
and a Papst 12dba for my Case.
Arctic cooling silencer for my CPU
And a Silent max noise reducing kit.
Now my Pc is really enjoyable silent.
Besides that i bought a new 20" Belinea WD Monitor
wow that Monitor rocks so hard !
And gives me endless pleasure to look at that incredible big screen.
My Tinnitus ended last Sunday !
And i am glad but somehow still schocked.
I experienced it 13days 24h/day non<x>stop and it was pure Horror.
So now i feel somehow changed and i take a lot of things more seriously.
Its not entierly the same but i feel somehow like people who experienced a schocking thing ( like a friend of them got murdered in front of them or sth.) that changes them forever.
I realized that life is acutally something that is probably more unstable than we are aware and that it is important to take things serious even when we dont see the actual sense in life.
I read Fira's Blog entry about everything seeming so worthless and his interesting point of view concering the determination of everything.
I felt the same before i got my Tinnitus.
I though that i dondt really care about being alive or dead cause its all senseless anyway.
But when your down for real and seriously think about killing yourself you will realize that deep inside you there is an incredible strong will to stay alive(survive).
if life was so senseless why do we have such a strong demand to stay alive ?
Okay i am almost 100% healed now
and Yeha i am glad about it.
Pokerwise :
I didnt play much this month (played only ~12days due to above reasons)
here is the sharckscope graph which is not entirely correct T_T but gives a good overall impression.
I think i will return to cashgame soon cause there is no big money to make with SNGs.
1.75 $ SNGS are good for making some easy extra cash , but you wont make more than
500$ a month at best even if you play 5h a day and have the skill of Rainkhan
the 3,40 $ are not too attractive giving you about the same profit but having the disadvantage of a higher buyin . besides that it doesnt really matter if you play 1or 2 table at micro stakes cause you reach the final table anyaways with the villian Lagtards.
the 6,50 $ 2 table SNGs might be attractive but i am not properly rolled for them yet and besides that i think most people at this stage could play some poker and its more about variance and luck then skill there.
I ll give them a try when my bankroll hits 200$ ( 30 buy ins) but i dont have too much expectations .
cashgame seems overall alot more attractive .
GL to all of you
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| U see what i did there with A8 ? He 4 bets and there we go insta jam A8 : ---booooom -- . hahahaha ( Krantz) | Last edit: 01/07/2007 09:09 |
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| Have you ever wondered which hurts the most: saying something and wishing you had not, or saying nothing, and wishing you had? | |
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Karma  Australia. Jul 01 2007 11:20. Posts 3538 | | |
Interesting post man, glad it went away |
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PplusAD Germany. Jul 01 2007 11:48. Posts 7182 | | |
Its almost ,but not 100% away. It s very easily bearable now.
right ear is 100% good
left ear i have a very silent noise that reminds me of a standby sound of older CD players. ( not sure if you know what i mean)
its still 24h a day but i don t hear it except when in totally silent surrounding or when concentrating on it.
-> i normally dont hear it in the day
-> in the night i listen to some soft music ballads.
So all in all i feel like healed.
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| U see what i did there with A8 ? He 4 bets and there we go insta jam A8 : ---booooom -- . hahahaha ( Krantz) | |
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goose58 United States. Jul 01 2007 12:02. Posts 871 | | | |
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damn that must have sucked to be hearing that 24/7 |
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