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hiems   United States. Feb 11 2020 21:50. Posts 2979
Hi everyone,

I've been dabbling with poker here and there for the past year and I probably need to take it a bit more seriously if I am going to see any positives coming out of poker. I've been making decent progress getting myself setup/organized, studying more, but I have a long way to go.

I live in New Jersey, so I have been playing StarsNJ on and off for the past year and put in ~30k hands. Since I have a job volume is difficult, but there is definitely room to improve in this area going forward. I have access to some pretty decent training content, which seems to be readily available these days. I have also decided to reinvest in a rented server and hope to become reasonably competent with Pio analysis this year.

Decided I'd make a quick blog post here so that I could get a bit more motivated with my goals.
I am going to make my initial set of goals fairly achievable so that I can build from it rather than set something unrealistic from the start
-8k hands / month (I realize this is low but given my setup I feel like this is a good starting point for me).
-devote time to Pio every week. I know this is vague, but i'm not even great with PIO yet. same thing with my volume goal being low at 8k hands, probably my PIO hand review goal will be something like 1-2 spots a day to start.
-get better with game selection, dont be in a rush to play higher stakes or battle regulars. exception for higher stakes (200nl and 500nl) is going to be when this huge whale sits in the daytime and I'm able to get a seat. otherwise, going to be focused on 50nl and 100nl for the time being.
-get better with using stats/databases/huds. this is an area i really suck at right now. currently using hem2 potentially switch to pokertracker or h2n.

I'm doing ok in other areas of my life (financial, fitness, learning, etc) probably the only thing lacking is socialization which I don't really have time for at the moment.

Anyway I guess that's it. Feel free to ask any questions.



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I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img]Last edit: 11/02/2020 21:56

dnagardi   Hungary. Feb 11 2020 22:13. Posts 1776

ditch poker, it's for your own good.
put in the same effort you just wrote into socialization. You will be a happier person. Poker will never give you what your heart desires.


hiems   United States. Feb 11 2020 22:27. Posts 2979

I don't even think you know a thing about me what is your problem?

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

RiKD    United States. Feb 12 2020 00:09. Posts 8442

Seems reasonable. I am not sure if I understand the endgame though. Is this a hobby? Fun? Are you trying to make it big?

What if you play like 50k hands as a .1 ptbb/100 winner and make $100 then what? Just continue the plan? Would that be fun for you?

We don't know much about you is true. Are you some Big Brained Scrabble Champion like Deldar? I remember when he was rising through the ranks and I was like who is this guy then I was like this guy isn't bad then he kept rocketshipping upwards. The funny thing is I don't know if that guy could even beat 500 NL these days. I'm sure he could if he put his mind towards it but I'm saying just jump right in there with 2009 skills he might get crushed.

Also, I don't understand why/how you don't really have time for socialization at the moment?

If poker is genuinely more fun than socialization than that is one thing. I think most people would like if not require some human connection. Maybe you get enough at work. Maybe not. I don't know. I think in conclusion at least I wouldn't value a pipe dream of being a big timer over socialization. All great players kind of valued a "pipe dream" over socialization. It's interesting to see or think about how it has paid off or not paid off for different people.


hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 00:50. Posts 2979

Hm the endgame is unclear. This is not me "chasing some pipe dream" and I am not trying to "make it big" or anything. Sure, I'd like to bink some huge score like anyone else but its not really a requirement. I do have above average financial goals though at a baseline achieve xyz networth by age xx etc, but mainly my scenarios for achieving those are not through poker.

On a side note I actually tried learning/am trying to learn Scrabble recently. Game is hard as f when you are a beginner.

dnagardi's post was pretty cunty. I dont even know where to start with how stupid it is so I'm not going to bother.

well obv I could make time for socialization, but for my own reasons I think its better to just spend time on other stuff for the time being.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

RiKD    United States. Feb 12 2020 02:07. Posts 8442

I will just say i/r/t socialization: like many things the longer it gets put off the harder it gets. I think I saw somewhere you said you were like 28. 28 is way harder than 18 at college but it's also way easier than 35. I really don't think this should be overlooked.


hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 04:01. Posts 2979

Hm well I'm > 28. It's a fair point so I'll take it into consideration.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

PuertoRican   United States. Feb 12 2020 04:01. Posts 13029

Continue to play poker, but don't have it as your main hobby.

Rekrul is a newb 

hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 04:16. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 03:01 PuertoRican wrote:
Continue to play poker, but don't have it as your main hobby.



Why?

edit : this is getting kind of ridiculous how many energy vampire there are on this site.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img]Last edit: 12/02/2020 04:21

Nitewin   United States. Feb 12 2020 04:21. Posts 1539

imo really think about your endgame goals.

I think dnagardi's post was in good heart as poker can be seen as a dangerous hobby affecting stress levels, socialization, and finances.

Also learning pio / strategy first might be better time spent vs putting in hours grinding at this point.


hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 04:40. Posts 2979

Jesus bro you swung from like 5k->100k-->busto--->5k-->60k trading options or something like that and you are telling me about this stuff about dangerous hobby affecting stress levels?

wat?

I'm not sure what you mean by think about your endgame goals. I already outlined in general how my financial goals are set up which is not from poker. I mean this is coming from you who doesnt actually have a job as opposed to me where my swings are less than <1% of my networth why am I getting lectured by you on this by you wtf.

This site is god awful.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

Loco   Canada. Feb 12 2020 04:57. Posts 20963


  On February 12 2020 03:40 hiems wrote:
This site is god awful.



Indeed. All of the liberals came out of the woodwork in order to attack you for no reason. They clearly all think they're better and wiser than you by trying to give you unwarranted advice. Unreal how arrogant these inferior beings are.

fuck I should just sell some of my Pokemon cards, if no one stakes that is what I will have to do - lostaccount 

hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 05:10. Posts 2979

lol this is ridiculous.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

RiKD    United States. Feb 12 2020 05:43. Posts 8442

It really comes down to what are you trying to accomplish?

Playing poker and working at the same time is hard to do. Let's say you build up a roll and some spare cash and start making 10c/hand at 200 NL. Are you going to consider quitting your job?

Like you really think you are going to compete with Stroggoz and the gang while working a full time job?

I don't know maybe I'm just jaded but sitting around a poker table or staring at my computer screen clicking buttons in parasitic "glory" sounds terrible even if poker is a fascinating game. If you really like playing poker than yeah just tell us all to fuck off and do your thing but you posted this here basically asking for feedback or accountability or whatever so you can't get too angry with responses.

If your finances and fitness and everything is in order it's time to start making friends and dating brah. Don't let life pass you by. Unless that's not what you want. I don't know what you want. But, sitting around playing 8k hands a month and getting to say a penny/hand seems silly to me. Unless it's no different to learning scrabble. But, I would think someone was a little weird if they spent 20 hours/month playing scrabble. Eh, maybe not. To each his own. I think I would get more behind the idea of getting really good at tournaments and doing the Sunday tournaments each week in your shoes. But, then I go back and think dnagardi might have just nailed it on the first post of the thread.


hiems   United States. Feb 12 2020 09:33. Posts 2979

^ I don't have time for you.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

Trav94   Canada. Feb 12 2020 11:35. Posts 1785


  On February 12 2020 03:40 hiems wrote:
This site is god awful.



Fuck off then.

You're the most miserable defensive crybaby whenever anyone comments something you don't like.


dnagardi   Hungary. Feb 12 2020 21:23. Posts 1776

lol man, most ppl on this site is probably 30+ giving you real positive advice with experience we actually experienced due to poker.

I had good intentions and I truly believe in what I wrote works in general. You are looking at these from the wrong angle, we are not trying to attack you.

if you put poker in front of socialization it will be destructive for you in the long run. No matter how much money you win. It puts you in a dark lonely corner without you even noticing it.

anyway this is just my oppinion, i might be wrong


Sleepy311   Vietnam. Feb 13 2020 00:04. Posts 154

NJ Online is a pretty rough grind man... It's mainly just regs going at it from NL50 and up waiting for stragglers... Why not just play at the Borgata or something where the games are good (And you can socialize with people)


hiems   United States. Feb 13 2020 00:32. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 23:04 Sleepy311 wrote:
NJ Online is a pretty rough grind man... It's mainly just regs going at it from NL50 and up waiting for stragglers... Why not just play at the Borgata or something where the games are good (And you can socialize with people)



I live way too far from Borgata or even Sands/Parx is 1hr+ from me. Also really hard to work on your game while playing live poker.

lol really is it that bad? I think its decent personally. I think you guys are being overly sensitive with "socializing" I probably shouldnt even have mentioned it at all or else dnagardi might have an orgasm again.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. Feb 13 2020 00:33. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 20:23 dnagardi wrote:
lol man, most ppl on this site is probably 30+ giving you real positive advice with experience we actually experienced due to poker.

I had good intentions and I truly believe in what I wrote works in general. You are looking at these from the wrong angle, we are not trying to attack you.

if you put poker in front of socialization it will be destructive for you in the long run. No matter how much money you win. It puts you in a dark lonely corner without you even noticing it.

anyway this is just my oppinion, i might be wrong



again, dont even know where to start with you. I'm just not going to bother.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img]Last edit: 13/02/2020 00:33

Stroggoz   New Zealand. Feb 13 2020 01:41. Posts 5290

Bar tenders earn more than poker pros now and they have more life experience

One of 3 non decent human beings on a site of 5 people with between 2-3 decent human beings 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 13 2020 09:23. Posts 15163

Honestly if I played part-time after a break and had little time I'd just get Snowie and try to leech off of someone else for sims

You will be way off in a lot of spots and Snowie's good enough for virtually no work put in you just chuck hands in run analysis, you don't need an hour to figure out Solver input and output for spots where you're way off
And NJ Stars should be pretty soft anyways if you play reg tables

Also work with solvers should be more strategic if you're serious than just running random spots when your time is limited
- These days the best thing is to pick e.g. BBvBU really workout the sizings, run a subset of a bunch of flops and focus on that for a while, chuck the outputs into a spreadsheet
And then practice it in game

And you can actually PLAY VS THAT DATABASE if you have GTO+ or simple postflop, think Pio doesn't have that yet
But depends on what gives you more joy - running that sick 3bet bluff in a 600bb pot is way more fun than another BBvBU flop frequencies vs bet breakdown, even though the latter will have drastically higher impact on your winrate

93% Sure! Last edit: 13/02/2020 09:41

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 13 2020 09:30. Posts 15163


  On February 12 2020 01:07 RiKD wrote:
I will just say i/r/t socialization: like many things the longer it gets put off the harder it gets. I think I saw somewhere you said you were like 28. 28 is way harder than 18 at college but it's also way easier than 35. I really don't think this should be overlooked.


Age has fuckall to do with this FYI
Like with anything else getting IRL network of friends is simply about the effort you put in

EDIT: I mean okay "harder" as in how active you have to be, ok fair enough - school and college pushes people to be together so you can make friends passively
My life's just backward to most people's though I suppose, it feels far easier and smoother to make new friends at 32 than it was till 28

93% Sure! Last edit: 13/02/2020 09:35

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 13 2020 09:39. Posts 15163


  On February 13 2020 00:41 Stroggoz wrote:
Bar tenders earn more than poker pros now and they have more life experience


Believe it or not
There is a bunch of people that love poker
TBH That's why I try to keep hanging out with part-time people that run sims and study poker theory for fun online - you get to suck their energy that's exactly the opposite of the former grinders that suck yours, because they do it on their own will as a hobby, and in the middle of a downer it's nice to be reminded that it's a game you can find great joy in just figuring it out

93% Sure! Last edit: 13/02/2020 09:50

hiems   United States. Feb 13 2020 18:39. Posts 2979

HMM Lemon rescues thread. nice job.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. Feb 13 2020 18:40. Posts 2979


  On February 13 2020 00:41 Stroggoz wrote:
Bar tenders earn more than poker pros now and they have more life experience



yea well maybe the way I worded it might cause some confusion but I have a job and my financial goals are mainly tied to that not poker. there are very few scenarios in which I'd quit job for full time poker.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

Liquid`Drone   Norway. Feb 13 2020 18:42. Posts 3093

Age is a big factor lol.. In general it is much easier to befriend people around your own age, and in general, people who are 35+ are much more set (and less willing to 'make new friends') than people who are 30+ and people who are 30+ are much more set than people who are 20-25. I mean, at 35+ you can still go out for drinks with your colleagues and stuff like that, maybe you can even get invited for superbowl or champions league finals or whatever, if you really bond well.. But making new friends at 35+ sounds very difficult to me. Most likely case for that would be getting a new girlfriend (possible) and befriending her friends (will only happen if you click really well with them - but I have seen this happen).

Anyway if you're 20 and moving to a new city and you don't have friends, being reasonably socially competent and putting yourself out there is gonna work out. Being 35+ and making new friends is a whole lot more demanding. I've met several colleagues over the past couple years (having worked at many different schools) that I have clicked really well with in a workplace setting, but literally 0 that I have actually 'hung out with' outside of work-related socializing, simply because even though I like them and they like me, we're all too busy with our own shit to start making new friends.

lol POKER 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 13 2020 21:52. Posts 15163

Is the time the main issue for you ?
Or simply the energy when looking for new friends after interacting with people all day at work ?
The "much more set" part - is that about yourself as well and how you feel about people ?

Btw how does your city you live in look like?
Prague has hipster cafes and even huge spaces like old barracks with workshops then meetup groups, expat communities, hikers, societies, event goers, alcoholics etc. Maybe I'm spoiled but you can go and meet people with a theme any day of the week pretty much, and you can meet the same ones regularly. And there are even people in their 60s doing this and making new friend. Like me haha :D My oldest reasonably good friend I hangout with a few times per month is 67

And it's getting easier and easier now, a big focus is building psychological flexibility for me, it's vital in poker but awesome in being open to making friends that are nothing like you

93% Sure! Last edit: 13/02/2020 22:10

AndrewSong    United States. Feb 14 2020 14:08. Posts 2355

Don't listen to these guys. Poker is still very good and with all the resource available, it takes very little effort to get better.
If you enjoy competing in competitive games, it's much better than use of your time than grinding video games.


LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 14 2020 17:45. Posts 15163

Eh that x100000
Especially Dota2
It's way more addictive total time black hole
And you leave way more stressed out coming out of it than in

Hash tag Dotaholics anonymous I've uninstalled it about 500 times now in my life

93% Sure!  

hiems   United States. Feb 15 2020 01:23. Posts 2979


  On February 13 2020 20:52 LemOn[5thF] wrote:
Is the time the main issue for you ?
Or simply the energy when looking for new friends after interacting with people all day at work ?
The "much more set" part - is that about yourself as well and how you feel about people ?

Btw how does your city you live in look like?
Prague has hipster cafes and even huge spaces like old barracks with workshops then meetup groups, expat communities, hikers, societies, event goers, alcoholics etc. Maybe I'm spoiled but you can go and meet people with a theme any day of the week pretty much, and you can meet the same ones regularly. And there are even people in their 60s doing this and making new friend. Like me haha :D My oldest reasonably good friend I hangout with a few times per month is 67

And it's getting easier and easier now, a big focus is building psychological flexibility for me, it's vital in poker but awesome in being open to making friends that are nothing like you



hm idk. really its not a big deal though I shouldnt't have even mentioned it so im not going to expand further on it. im pretty comfortable in my own skin at this point and it actually offers a ton of advantages.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. Feb 15 2020 01:24. Posts 2979


  On February 14 2020 13:08 AndrewSong wrote:
Don't listen to these guys. Poker is still very good and with all the resource available, it takes very little effort to get better.
If you enjoy competing in competitive games, it's much better than use of your time than grinding video games.



yea, thanks. this is my probably close to my general approach at the moment.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 15 2020 10:35. Posts 15163

Wasn't asking you but the guys correlate age with hardness of making friends

93% Sure!  

hiems   United States. Feb 15 2020 12:14. Posts 2979

ah ok.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

Santafairy   Korea (South). Feb 15 2020 19:12. Posts 2224

with respect to the fact you think everyone else posting is stupid, you could be stupid also

you say "goals" but what's missing from the explanation is your motives. you say it's not really financial independence because job is better. okay noted.

I disagree with AndrewSong in that there are many games and similar things that can engage your competitive masculinity and it differs from person to person which one you can get the most out of. poker could be fine but it may not be the best thing for hiems. maybe hiems's true calling is billiards. this is not to discourage from poker, but sometimes we don't consider what's out there, outside our boxes.

like if you translate these goals to something else
-play 30 games of BW a month
-focus more on 2v2 tournaments
-get better with dodging smurfs
-analyze my replays and build orders

these "goals" i mean they just sound... self-evident, i want to play more and get better. yeah no shit. but you don't know necessarily what direction that could be. like why would you organize them as goals in this way for any game that's not about money, yet in the game that's played for money, that you say isn't really about money, but you have these goals, so i don't see what the motive is. like, i want to play higher stakes without losing because that's a thrill? i want to get good at multitabling zoom because that's where the flow is? i want to win a MTT at this buy-in because then i will have accomplished something? like of all the dimensions which one is your motive for these goals. just have a competitive fun hobby that also trickles in money rather than being a spending hobby, like lamp collecting for example. if you've asked yourself this and understand then okay but defensive as fuck blog as usual

It seems to be not very profitable in the long run to play those kind of hands. - Gus Hansen 

RiKD    United States. Feb 15 2020 20:42. Posts 8442


  On February 13 2020 20:52 LemOn[5thF] wrote:
Is the time the main issue for you ?
Or simply the energy when looking for new friends after interacting with people all day at work ?
The "much more set" part - is that about yourself as well and how you feel about people ?

Btw how does your city you live in look like?
Prague has hipster cafes and even huge spaces like old barracks with workshops then meetup groups, expat communities, hikers, societies, event goers, alcoholics etc. Maybe I'm spoiled but you can go and meet people with a theme any day of the week pretty much, and you can meet the same ones regularly. And there are even people in their 60s doing this and making new friend. Like me haha :D My oldest reasonably good friend I hangout with a few times per month is 67

And it's getting easier and easier now, a big focus is building psychological flexibility for me, it's vital in poker but awesome in being open to making friends that are nothing like you



I don't drink anymore so it's doubly difficult but also in some ways easier because I have Alcoholics Anonymous. In college I lived in a suite with 10 men with a suite next door of 10 women with a suite next door of 10 men with a suite next door of 10 women, etc. in a tower of 28 floors of that situation. Drinking was lax in the dorms. ID'ing was lax in bars. There was a plethora of house parties at any given time. I remember playing missionred.com to increase my APM so I could own noobs at WarCraft 3 and this smart, quirky, attractive Indian (red dot... she didn't really have a red dot I just feel like being funny or racist or both) tells me I need to come out that night with our group of friends and her group of friends. Shit like that happened all the time. I'm actively trying not to be social but I am getting asked out to do stuff all the time.

28 is harder but hopefully the person has built up some skills. Women expect more.

If a woman is 35 and doesn't have kids and wants kids she's not going to fuck around.

Ok, I mean I don't want to go too in depth here because I and Drone have already laid it mostly out for you. There is the aspect of it being harder to acquire social skills the older one gets. University you can mess up a lot and it doesn't really matter. In AA one can mess up a lot and it doesn't really matter. But at 35 one doesn't want to alienate the social group one desires. People at 35 just aren't doing as much, have less tolerance for bull shit, etc.

I didn't really answer your questions:

Time is not a big issue but remember in college I had classes like a few hours a day and didn't study much so that's a lot of free time and I'm surrounded by people in a similar boat.

I still have plenty of energy. Socializing most days energizes me so it's not an issue.

I am not similar to drone in that I don't feel like I'm all set. I am actively trying to make new friends and connections. But I would say most people who are 35 are more inline with that "all set" mindset and aren't necessarily looking to put themselves out there to meet new people.

My city isn't bad. Doesn't sound as nice as your city but it's not horrible.


hiems   United States. Feb 16 2020 03:44. Posts 2979


  On February 15 2020 18:12 Santafairy wrote:
with respect to the fact you think everyone else posting is stupid, you could be stupid also

you say "goals" but what's missing from the explanation is your motives. you say it's not really financial independence because job is better. okay noted.

I disagree with AndrewSong in that there are many games and similar things that can engage your competitive masculinity and it differs from person to person which one you can get the most out of. poker could be fine but it may not be the best thing for hiems. maybe hiems's true calling is billiards. this is not to discourage from poker, but sometimes we don't consider what's out there, outside our boxes.

like if you translate these goals to something else
-play 30 games of BW a month
-focus more on 2v2 tournaments
-get better with dodging smurfs
-analyze my replays and build orders

these "goals" i mean they just sound... self-evident, i want to play more and get better. yeah no shit. but you don't know necessarily what direction that could be. like why would you organize them as goals in this way for any game that's not about money, yet in the game that's played for money, that you say isn't really about money, but you have these goals, so i don't see what the motive is. like, i want to play higher stakes without losing because that's a thrill? i want to get good at multitabling zoom because that's where the flow is? i want to win a MTT at this buy-in because then i will have accomplished something? like of all the dimensions which one is your motive for these goals. just have a competitive fun hobby that also trickles in money rather than being a spending hobby, like lamp collecting for example. if you've asked yourself this and understand then okay but defensive as fuck blog as usual



ty for your advice gayfairy.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 16 2020 12:29. Posts 15163


  On February 15 2020 19:42 RiKD wrote:
Show nested quote +



I don't drink anymore so it's doubly difficult but also in some ways easier because I have Alcoholics Anonymous. In college I lived in a suite with 10 men with a suite next door of 10 women with a suite next door of 10 men with a suite next door of 10 women, etc. in a tower of 28 floors of that situation. Drinking was lax in the dorms. ID'ing was lax in bars. There was a plethora of house parties at any given time. I remember playing missionred.com to increase my APM so I could own noobs at WarCraft 3 and this smart, quirky, attractive Indian (red dot... she didn't really have a red dot I just feel like being funny or racist or both) tells me I need to come out that night with our group of friends and her group of friends. Shit like that happened all the time. I'm actively trying not to be social but I am getting asked out to do stuff all the time.

28 is harder but hopefully the person has built up some skills. Women expect more.

If a woman is 35 and doesn't have kids and wants kids she's not going to fuck around.

Ok, I mean I don't want to go too in depth here because I and Drone have already laid it mostly out for you. There is the aspect of it being harder to acquire social skills the older one gets. University you can mess up a lot and it doesn't really matter. In AA one can mess up a lot and it doesn't really matter. But at 35 one doesn't want to alienate the social group one desires. People at 35 just aren't doing as much, have less tolerance for bull shit, etc.

I didn't really answer your questions:

Time is not a big issue but remember in college I had classes like a few hours a day and didn't study much so that's a lot of free time and I'm surrounded by people in a similar boat.

I still have plenty of energy. Socializing most days energizes me so it's not an issue.

I am not similar to drone in that I don't feel like I'm all set. I am actively trying to make new friends and connections. But I would say most people who are 35 are more inline with that "all set" mindset and aren't necessarily looking to put themselves out there to meet new people.

My city isn't bad. Doesn't sound as nice as your city but it's not horrible.

Sounds like the only difference is that you have to put in an active effort rather than be passive?

I guess you've been an alcoholic, but weak willpower aside what'd stop you from hanging out with people that drink and just don't drink alcohol?

What does being a woman at 28/35 have to do with making friends - I don't really see the problem. Just check any wine bar in the evenings and you'll see they find the time lol


93% Sure! Last edit: 16/02/2020 12:31

RiKD    United States. Feb 16 2020 19:09. Posts 8442

I'm just saying college is constantly social. Everyone is in class like 15 hours a week if that and even the students who had to study a lot were typically organized and studious about it. "Hey, let's grab some food," "Hey, let's grab a picnic table down at Catfish Biff's," "Hey, the girls next door have some alcohol let's go over there."

In order to just have some non-alcoholic acquaintances these days I had to happen upon a Mexie vid where she mentions Food Not Bombs, find out the info on FNB, strike up the courage to go down there, and now I have to go consistently.

It's not about having been an alcoholic. I have alcoholism. It's not about willpower. I am different in mind and body. It's a disease. I am allergic. But nothing is stopping me from hanging out with people that drink and I don't drink. I do this on occasion. I'm not going to belly up to the bar by myself and order a club soda and cranberry juice though. I have to have a reason to be there. The other night I was hungry after work and didn't want to eat another PB&J so went to the only bar that still served food. I bellied up to the bar to have a sweet tea and a sandwich and the women next to me was sloppy drunk and the other guy next to me was taking all sorts of shots and it really wasn't much of a pleasurable experience. The bartender was nice but busy and the food was good but I haven't been back.

See that is the thing. I used to love wine bars. I would go by myself and found them more quiet and chill. I met some really interesting people in wine bars but again, today, I am not going to stroll into a wine bar by myself and sit there with a sparkling water and lime if they even have limes. And we were talking about making friends and dating. 35 yr old women will go to wine bars and complain about how guys don't have their shit together and I really can't blame them. No woman is going to want to have a baby with me at the moment so why would they even date me unless they also want to not be lonely, maybe laugh, have conversation, maybe some organic orgasms if I play my cards right and also they play their cards right. But I can't really provide the fun and excitement that the 20 somethings want and I can't provide the male provider that many 30 somethings want so it seems like I have to settle with desperate chubby women, single moms, and cougars. I quite like big women. "If models were made for modeling, big girls were made for cuddling" - Andre 3000.


Santafairy   Korea (South). Feb 16 2020 19:23. Posts 2224

lol what is this shit where's your shawl cardigan

It seems to be not very profitable in the long run to play those kind of hands. - Gus Hansen 

LemOn[5thF]   Czech Republic. Feb 16 2020 19:53. Posts 15163

I was talking about making friends

Dating women in their 30s is a different thing from making friends
They have so much pressure on them as every year that passes there's increased risk of pregnancy complications, fertility goes down. And even if you are comfortable in your skin and kids are not important to you...you know you can't change your mind later, and as woke as society is and when we obviously don't need high fertility now there's still loads of peer pressure on women...

Obviously they are a lot more likely to be more straightforward an no-nonsense picky when it comes to partners, doesn't really apply much to friends though

I agree by the way with the notion that monogamous dating is pretty much pointless unless you plan on having kids, but pretty sure a lot of people would disagree with you there.But on the other hand when it comes to dating nobody is forcing you to date women in their mid-late 30s in the first place when you're that age?

93% Sure! Last edit: 16/02/2020 19:56

RiKD    United States. Feb 17 2020 02:24. Posts 8442


  On February 16 2020 18:23 Santafairy wrote:
lol what is this shit where's your shawl cardigan



I gave it to goodwill.


RiKD    United States. Feb 17 2020 02:37. Posts 8442


  On February 16 2020 18:53 LemOn[5thF] wrote:
I was talking about making friends

Dating women in their 30s is a different thing from making friends
They have so much pressure on them as every year that passes there's increased risk of pregnancy complications, fertility goes down. And even if you are comfortable in your skin and kids are not important to you...you know you can't change your mind later, and as woke as society is and when we obviously don't need high fertility now there's still loads of peer pressure on women...

Obviously they are a lot more likely to be more straightforward an no-nonsense picky when it comes to partners, doesn't really apply much to friends though

I agree by the way with the notion that monogamous dating is pretty much pointless unless you plan on having kids, but pretty sure a lot of people would disagree with you there.But on the other hand when it comes to dating nobody is forcing you to date women in their mid-late 30s in the first place when you're that age?



I already said I'm not fun and exciting enough for 20 somethings (or rich enough).

I also never said that monogamous dating is pointless unless you plan on having kids. To each his own but I prefer dating lots of women until I find one to be in a monogamous relationship with whether I have kids or not. I am not really interested in any other arrangement.

If we are just talking about friends it's not impossible to make friends at 35+ Drone and myself just posit that it is more difficult. If you are finding it easy at 35 that is great. It's certainly possible. I am doing it too. So, maybe we should focus on that aspect of it but the key here is that hiems keeps putting it off and putting it off. Even if he's comfortable in his own skin as he says that doesn't mean he's actually comfortable in social situations and he could just like ease his way into socialization whenever he wants and that's not going to get any easier is my point.


VanDerMeyde   Norway. Feb 18 2020 13:10. Posts 5108

Go down to 25nl and put in 3500+ hands per day rather than baby volume on higher stakes. Then move up to 50nl and 100nl when u are more comfortable with the swings at those stakes after building a bigger roll for it @ 25nl. This way you will also become a lot better poker player because of high volume. So when u do move up to 50nl and 100nl the difference is probably not as big from 25nl as u think. And u are more prepared for it on several levels.

:DLast edit: 18/02/2020 13:11

RiKD    United States. Feb 18 2020 15:26. Posts 8442

hiems has a full time job. How in the hell is he going to play 3500+ hands per day?


hiems   United States. Feb 18 2020 16:24. Posts 2979


  On February 18 2020 12:10 VanDerMeyde wrote:
Go down to 25nl and put in 3500+ hands per day rather than baby volume on higher stakes. Then move up to 50nl and 100nl when u are more comfortable with the swings at those stakes after building a bigger roll for it @ 25nl. This way you will also become a lot better poker player because of high volume. So when u do move up to 50nl and 100nl the difference is probably not as big from 25nl as u think. And u are more prepared for it on several levels.



Hm yeah you might be right. Thanks that is helpful advice. I have actually been playing more of 30nl since my blog post (We have that instead of 25nl) because traffic is such that even 50nl sometimes is hard to get when the traffic is low. The 8k hands was planned for 50nl/100nl which I am sure is softer than Stars but your definitely right in that its still baby volume perhaps I was underestimating exactly how many hands a month it is that you need to actually get better even if I had it in the back of my mind that I would work up towards more hands. I do have a full time job which it would be mostly fine but the way my schedule works there are going to be days off here and there and I think those days off do hurt my flow a decent amount. I might be able to change this in the future tho and there are some ways I can work around this problem.

Some additional notes

-I usually have been playing 3-4 tables before but this last session I had 6 tables of 30nl and it is super soft and the additional tables made it alot easier to achieve volume targets.
-Currently on 27 inch monitor which is the largest monitor I have ever had but kinda wish I had thought more about it and am wondering if 32inch+ or ultrawides are worth it. It seems difficult to play more than 6 tables on this setup maybe I'm doing something wrong..
-As mentioned I still want to play @ 200nl/500nl against this particular whale who pretty much is hunted by everyone on the site.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img]Last edit: 18/02/2020 16:35

Santafairy   Korea (South). Feb 18 2020 19:31. Posts 2224

you've found the guy laliberte of 200nl on a random site

It seems to be not very profitable in the long run to play those kind of hands. - Gus Hansen 

RiKD    United States. Feb 18 2020 20:40. Posts 8442

Guy wasn't actually that bad he was just playing with the very best. I would wager in 2009 Guy could beat 200 PLO if there was someway for a billionaire to care about 200 PLO.


Trav94   Canada. Feb 21 2020 00:51. Posts 1785


  On February 18 2020 12:10 VanDerMeyde wrote:
Go down to 25nl and put in 3500+ hands per day rather than baby volume on higher stakes. Then move up to 50nl and 100nl when u are more comfortable with the swings at those stakes after building a bigger roll for it @ 25nl. This way you will also become a lot better poker player because of high volume. So when u do move up to 50nl and 100nl the difference is probably not as big from 25nl as u think. And u are more prepared for it on several levels.




+1


hiems   United States. May 26 2022 20:37. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 23:04 Sleepy311 wrote:
NJ Online is a pretty rough grind man... It's mainly just regs going at it from NL50 and up waiting for stragglers... Why not just play at the Borgata or something where the games are good (And you can socialize with people)



Lol what a pussy

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. May 26 2022 20:37. Posts 2979


  On February 11 2020 21:13 dnagardi wrote:
ditch poker, it's for your own good.
put in the same effort you just wrote into socialization. You will be a happier person. Poker will never give you what your heart desires.



Good old vagina dnagardi

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. May 26 2022 20:37. Posts 2979


  On February 11 2020 23:09 RiKD wrote:
Seems reasonable. I am not sure if I understand the endgame though. Is this a hobby? Fun? Are you trying to make it big?

What if you play like 50k hands as a .1 ptbb/100 winner and make $100 then what? Just continue the plan? Would that be fun for you?

We don't know much about you is true. Are you some Big Brained Scrabble Champion like Deldar? I remember when he was rising through the ranks and I was like who is this guy then I was like this guy isn't bad then he kept rocketshipping upwards. The funny thing is I don't know if that guy could even beat 500 NL these days. I'm sure he could if he put his mind towards it but I'm saying just jump right in there with 2009 skills he might get crushed.

Also, I don't understand why/how you don't really have time for socialization at the moment?

If poker is genuinely more fun than socialization than that is one thing. I think most people would like if not require some human connection. Maybe you get enough at work. Maybe not. I don't know. I think in conclusion at least I wouldn't value a pipe dream of being a big timer over socialization. All great players kind of valued a "pipe dream" over socialization. It's interesting to see or think about how it has paid off or not paid off for different people.



This idiot can't even beat 10nl lol

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. May 26 2022 20:38. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 03:57 Loco wrote:
Show nested quote +



Indeed. All of the liberals came out of the woodwork in order to attack you for no reason. They clearly all think they're better and wiser than you by trying to give you unwarranted advice. Unreal how arrogant these inferior beings are.


Loco!!

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

hiems   United States. May 26 2022 20:42. Posts 2979


  On February 12 2020 20:23 dnagardi wrote:
lol man, most ppl on this site is probably 30+ giving you real positive advice with experience we actually experienced due to poker.

I had good intentions and I truly believe in what I wrote works in general. You are looking at these from the wrong angle, we are not trying to attack you.

if you put poker in front of socialization it will be destructive for you in the long run. No matter how much money you win. It puts you in a dark lonely corner without you even noticing it.

anyway this is just my oppinion, i might be wrong



Didn't say it at the time but I'm older than this retard lol.

I beat Loco!!! [img]https://i.imgur.com/wkwWj2d.png[/img] 

 



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