Poker is a weird game

Well which of your values is grinding poker in line with?

Life is a grind already you sod it doesn't matter if poker even existed or not

I tried to make $2milli in one year and went broke trying. It's not like anyone can just snap their fingers and make retirement money. Moving up stakes is exciting at first but it is still a grind. Maybe a more challenging grind which can be fun or it can be frustrating. Read the bankroll management chapters in "Mathematics of Poker" to get a better grasp of game selection and how you should be managing your money. Playing a fish heads up at 3/6 is better than playing in an ok 25/50 game even if you had a $5milli bankroll. Withdrawing x amount of money from your account every month can lead to high % chance risk of ruin. You basically want to be able to kelly bet your bankroll up to as high a number as possible but poker isn't exactly scalable like that but you can still use similar principles. There are other considerations like differing degrees of black swan events where shots are more than acceptable. Black swan may not be the precise term I'm looking for but basically there were some megafish in the PLO games in 2009 and a pro has to take advantage of that. It's a great opportunity to pile up cash and if things don't go well, oh well, I'll be a little sad. Continuing to play the games ad infinitum disregarding bankroll and tilt levels and going broke taking you out of the game entirely can be rather traumatic though and I don't recommend.

well i've never been at this duality you describe but for me it slowly turned from great love and passion to a mind numbing senseless grind.
Starting poker was great, stopping even greater.

elaborate whats behind love and hate?

When I first started poker I had a passion for the game. I would fold full houses if I didn't think they were bluffing. I enjoyed it and made money. Towards the end of my career I had become more loose aggressive, as well as less passionate for the game. I'd win lots at a time just to lose it just as fast. Imo my key to success was my passion for the game. If you don't enjoy what you're doing, it'd be extremely difficult being the best at it.

I don't recommend having a life crisis while playing poker as your emotions can destroy your bankroll rather quickly and leave you in a downward spiral, especially if you're living off of the poker income.

depends on your goals.

Hey guys, thanks for the input. I just got back from the casino and I figured it was a good time to expand a little bit more on my post since I'm feeling exactly as when I wrote this entry.
To put things a little bit on perspective first of all I have to say I dont depend on poker to live ($) but at the same time it's also been a good part of my income, I guess I see myself as a part time player-low stakes grinder.
I've been grinding live games for the most part @Vegas for the last 5 years, I take trips there and treat them as business trips, put in 100-150hrs at the tables and go back to my hometown in Mexico. I have logged over 4k hrs.

On March 03 2020 19:50 dnagardi wrote: elaborate whats behind love and hate?

Pretty much what you said, a numbing senseless grind its a good way to describe it, like I don't give a fuck if I win/lose huge in a session, its just another day...
I've been losing respect for money at the table lately and in consequence I've been playing way too loose.
For the most part I think I've been good thru my career at keeping my A game when I play but lately it seems like I can only play my C game at best and I have this weird feeling/sense as if I unlearned all I know about the game, I dont know how to explain it, its just like my mind just isnt sharp anymore when I am at the table and when I leave the casino I end up with this sense of emptiness. "Why do I even play this game?" sort of thoughts, therefore the hate. I dont know, sometimes its hard for me to keep the eye on the ball I guess.

On March 04 2020 07:07 Nitewin wrote: If you don't enjoy what you're doing, it'd be extremely difficult being the best at it.

I couldn't agree more here, when I started playing was because I insta fell in love with the game, was/still a passion but by now its really hard for me to tell why I play, love/money?
I really want to quit poker and move up to something else, perhaps invest all the time I dedicate to poker into growing a business instead, but at the same time I dont want to give up on the income it provides for me and its not even like I'm making big money from poker but even being a decent winner at low stakes equals decent money in Mexico, I would never grind the low stakes if I lived in the U.S. for example.

On March 04 2020 17:16 hiems wrote: depends on your goals.

My initial goal was and still is to be a winning player at NL1000 by at least 5bb/hr and I still havent sat down at those tables not even once even tho my current poker bankroll could support taking some shots, I've been a nit living in the confort zone for too long now maybe.


Enough of this ranting/catarsis.

Sounds like you need to take a short break. Just don't make a habit out of long extended breaks too often and you should be fine long term.

Also if you computer savvy contemplate doing online poker so you can reduce your hours/stress levels and pursue some actual hobbies/real life stuff on the side.

If you truly don't like playing anymore start thinking of exit strategies..

It's quite a blessing to making good $ at home safe and sound whilst many in the world having hard time putting food on the table due to unforeseen economic hardships.