|
|
Can anyone proofread my news article? |
|
1
|
El_Tanque   United States. Feb 21 2011 22:43. Posts 360 | | |
I'm a newspaper reporter for my university...I wrote an article tonight on a Yoga class that started up today, and it must be turned in by tomorrow @ 4pm to the editors. I'm not sure if I can get it edited by my professor due to my work schedule tomorrow. I'll try at lunch, but it's not 100% sure she'll be in her office. If anyone knows how to go over and edit my paper in Associated Press style, that would be awesome.
Thanks again,
Tanque
+ Show Spoiler +
Northwestern's Wellness Center began offering a new yoga class Monday Feb. 21. The class offers to “Bring mind, body and spirit together.”
The class is one hour long and begins at 6:00 p.m on Monday, Tuesday and Thursday. Next week however, the schedule has been changed to Monday, Wednesday and Thursday at the same times.
It is taught by yoga guru and northwestern biology professor Dr. Venkata Moorthy. He has been at northwestern since 1995, and taught the yoga class previously on campus, but had to stop due to a scheduling conflict. He is back and in his 33rd year of practicing yoga, 32 of them teaching students as a yoga guru.
Yoga began several thousand years ago in India, and it means to control or unite as his brochure said. There are many different types of yoga, but Dr. Moorthy specializes in Hata yoga, where the fundamentals “connect body mind and spirit with breathing techniques following exercise to body parts and relaxation.” said Dr. Moorthy. “Breathing is the main thing. You will learn how to breath properly. Normal breathing will not let you take in enough oxygen. It's more important to breath. You pay attention to your deep breathing, which allows you to put your body mind and spirit together.”
When it comes to relaxation, hata yoga is what you are looking for. “Your brain is always working, when you focus on breathing, you will be able to concentrate on what you are doing, which will help you focus on body mind and spirit.” Dr. Moorthy said.
This exercise can also help burn fat, Dr. Moorthy said. “Most yoga position allow you to stretch, which will help your muscles. You will be able to digest your fat molecules, when you supply more oxygen to your muscles. It will take a long time, many months, but if you stick with it, it will work.”
Yoga is perceived to be a stretching exercise, but there is much more to it. Along with the health benefits, it can also help your memory, said Dr. Moorthy. “It also helps your memory, you lose your anger, and it helps your body calm down. When it makes you concentrate, that is how you calm down. Some people have a negative attitude all the time, this will help them have a positive.
It helps you have patience because the positions are so slow.”
Many people believe that it is an exercise whose students are women only. This is a false stereotype. Anyone who can benefit from the mental or physical exercise is welcome to come. “It's good for everybody, especially students. They are under stress and this is a stress relieving program. They have to cook for themselves, go to school, and earn money, they have to do everything for themselves, and they don't have their parents here anymore.”
|
|
| 1
|
vegable   United States. Feb 22 2011 05:30. Posts 2453 | | |
well I do read regularly read articles and do have some bones to pick with what is out there. My university newsletter is one of the things i also skim so here are my thoughts
you want to leave that beginning statement about the event for the last sentence of your article. people who finish reading will have the most important info in the freshest parts of their memory that way.
the body of your article seems fine. instead begin with an attention grabber that transitions well into your text. something like
"what could you possibly have in common with contortionists in China? yoga bitch! Dr. Venkata Moorthy is an expert blah blah blah"
finally, the glaring error in reporting that I see there, is "This is a false stereotype" in your last paragraph. unless its an editorial piece, leave your opinion (but not common assumption) out of the objective work. also since youre moving that first statement to the end, make some sort of reference to who that last quotation is coming from. like Dr. Moorthy will be teaching at these times....
gl with your submission!
|
|
|
| 1
|
Funktion   Australia. Feb 22 2011 21:29. Posts 1638 | | |
| On February 22 2011 04:30 vegable wrote:
well I do read regularly read articles and...
|
Stop right there... |
|
| |
|
|
Poker Streams | |
|