1 | |
Warning : Long text.
Ok I have been thinking a lot during the last few days, and I came to the conclusion that I really need help. I think my biggest problem is my ego/tilt problems , and I always think that I somehow deserve to win or etc JUST because i used to win a few years ago, but I wasn't thinking alot about my game and I also refrained from discussing hands for a long time. But this will change now. I will give myself a last try, if I really shouldnt succeed until May/June, I will stop playing poker totally. Because the effort and time is definately not worth it anymore, and I seem to have wrong illusions. ( I tend to think things like, I can get back on track, maybe I'll become a semi-solid winner again and stuff like that, but thats not going to happen if I dont change my view and my whole approach to the game. )
I started playing poker in 2005 basically, playing some freerolls, then I started playign with 5$ that I got on PS and started playing seriously around the end of 2005. I have made good money right from the start, and I learned a lot in this time. The games used to be 100000000x easier as today as well. ( or at least I feel that way nowadays, because I cant seem to win anymore. w-ever )
In this time, I rarely had tilt issues/issues controling myself, and I worked this 5$ up from the 1c/2c tables on PS until like 50NL. Then I decided to change to EUROBET, because it was rakeback available there. I kinda built up a roll there too, like 2000$ and I won some tourneys and shit as well.
Well later, I got sick of Eurobet and the crappy software, so I went back to PS. That was in the first months of 2006, and I worked my way up until the 200NL tables, where i made a lot of money. (at least it was a lot of money for me back then, when I look at what some of you guys make it is certainly ridicolous.) Then, I lost a lot of money because I had to cashout at the end of 2006 due to some incidents. And that was where my crisis basically started, in the year 2007. I was suddenly not my old self anymore, I wasn't playing good anymore and tilting from time to time and all. Well I dont want to go into more details, because the story is getting too long already. Basically 2007 was still decent money, I also won a lot of tourneys, but cash games really didnt work as well anymore, I also started getting tilt issues and stuff and I didnt really try to improve my game, whereas all the other people obviously did. I managed to get half back on track, and even worked my way up to NL400, but the tilt monkey came back and I really lost a huge amount of my roll playing underrolled. Well since then I dont seem to be able to really win anymore. I never lost any money, and I basically still won because all the money I played with was still made of the initial 5$.
2008 I basically stopped playing a few months, and then in november started again, trying to build up everything again. I made money I cant complain, but I feel that I stay a lot under my capabilites just because I am so lazy and never really faced my worst problems. I basically thought all the time that they would just dissapear, but now i will finally try to make a change.
Going to put a lot of hands in here from now on, and stats and everything, and I hope that I can really overcome my problems and I MIGHT succeed as a player again.
As you can see, I have a long history playing poker. I just got a hold on my old handhistorys(only PS tho, missing a lot of hands from other sites) and decided to import them into HEM.
Look at the funny graphs. Enjoy
2006
My best year in poker. Everything seemed so easy. However, i lacked motivation and dedication, I probably could have done a lot better there already.
2007
Bad year as you can see. But I won some tourneys there and on other sites I also won money, so its not as bad as it looks, but for me it was certainly a very bad experience to start losing the first time.
Dont have a graph for 2008 now, going to follow up later.
End of the rambling, gonna start posting some hands/stats etc. later...
|
| |
|
| 1
 |
YoMeR United States. Jan 30 2009 18:17. Posts 12438 | | |
you remind me of myself. completely hammer smash NL400+ for a year or so for like 8 ptbb/100 and live the ez life then go busto and really struggle for a longass time. And take forever to finally start recovering ;( |
| |
|
| 1 | |
Damn, sorry to hear that you are in kinda the same situation ;(.
Actually i remember playing with you @ NL100 I think a long time ago. 2006 or something. Did you have an avatar with a golden gun on PS ?
|
| |
|
| |
|
Contact Users: 427 Active, 2 Logged in - Time: 22:52
,
,
,
,