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AgentIce   . Dec 31 2010 10:15. Posts 28
So it's been an interesting couple of days for me. Yesterday after not sleeping well for 5 or 6 days I just had enough and the pain I was in was just getting unbearable so I went to the hospital. I couldn't take another day of it. Well turns out I had a fever of 102 and I was dehydrated which makes sense because I've been sweating profusely ever since I stopped taking the Zoloft. They put me on an IV and took some chest x-rays and did some blood work. Of course I came back completely healthy (what always happens, no matter how much pain I'm in) but I was there for like 7 hours while they did all that. When I left my temperature had dropped to 99 and I was feeling slightly better and I managed to sleep when I finally got back home.

I was feeling better yesterday but not up to poker so I watched some videos and played a little League of Legends. Also studied a few different articles on psychology, mostly concerned with ADD. It was nice to not spend the day bed ridden and racked with pain though. Mostly just sweating my ass off for no particular reason.

It's becoming apparent to me that if I do get a degree in psychology it will just be so people listen to me and I have some credibility, because I feel the field is incredibly lacking. For one thing, they seem overly concerned with symptoms. What chemical imbalances exist? What vitamin deficiencies? What are the symptoms of ADD and how do you diagnose it?

As far as effective cures, or discovering what might actually cause the various symptoms associated with a disease, there is not much available. The status quo is to find some sort of drug (usually a powerful mind altering one like meth aka adderall or cocaine aka ritalin) to calm down whatever symptoms are associated with the disease and then hopefully with therapy the patient can learn to not need the drug by developing specific behaviors and ways of coping with their symptoms. Still though, not much is said about WHY someone might have said symptoms. Not to mention it is very disturbing and downright horrifying to read about peoples experiences with the side effects of such powerful mind altering drugs and the fact that these are prescribed to young children.

Imagine your child has a broken bone that is protruding for the world to see, yet the only thing doctors tell you to do is to either have the leg removed or to be given a drug that takes your mind off the pain but you will have to take it for the rest of your life in most cases and you will never be 100%. I think most people would be outraged at these circumstances, yet that's exactly what goes on in the field of psychology today. A percentage of people recover and return to living normal lives, most don't and are forever doomed to a life of prescription drugs and the side effects associated with them. Often people end up even worse than before. It's as if the field of mental health is still in the dark ages compared to the rest of society.

Well having spent the bulk of my life with symptoms classified as manic depressive, OCD, ADHD, bi-polar, NPD, you name it, I have been in a constant and habitual search of my mind for answers. That was part of the problem of course, but I'd like to talk about my own insights on the subject.

First off, one element that is sorely lacking in psychology is the concept of responsibility. In fact, the very definition of insanity is that someone is not responsible for their own actions. To be not responsible for your actions is to be doomed to live life as an animal in a constant state of stimulus response survival. You are no more than a dog trying to get a bone. A sack of chemicals that wanders around waiting for your environment to dictate your actions. The truth is it is very easy to fall into this state. When you are in a situation where your fight or flight response mechanism kicks in, your logical and reasoning side shuts down and your mind and body take over. It's true a person could be said to be not responsible for their actions in this state. For the neurotic they are stuck in this state on certain subjects. For the psychotic they are stuck in this state nearly 100% of the time and often to a debilitating level that doesn't let them function, never knowing true peace or relaxation or love having completely lost touch with their humanity.

So what makes us human then? What can someone really be responsible for? Do we define ourselves by our actions? Some would say so. But if someone is a murderer and completely changes their life and never murders again, when do they stop being a murderer? Of course the answer is when he decides to, and no amount of prison or punishment can force someone to do that. In fact I think it's clear that trying to define a person and label them by their actions is completely cruel and unfair, and our prison systems are a testament to that, that's another subject though. All that should matter is that they learn from their mistakes.

My opinion is that the only thing that defines a person is the very thing which makes us human and not animals. That part of ourselves we call our soul, our conscious - that part of us that is aware of being aware, the observer, whatever you want to call it. The part of you that is pure awareness and creativity, the operator pressing the buttons of this amazing computer called the mind. That part of you that is certainty, that recognizes what is real and what isn't. That part of you that can tell the difference between vivid dreams or mental wanderings and reality. It's what brought us out of mere subsistence survival and separated us from just being an animal.

So what is the mind then? Separate from the conscious part of ourselves is the mind which is basically just a collection of tools at our disposal that are meant to better our chances at survival. They are meant to be useful which is a key distinction. Any habitual tendency you have you have it because you find some use out of it. As children we are quite free with our minds and have fun just going from one thing to the next playing with this awesome toy. One second we are playing the evil guy, the next the saintly knight, the next dinosaurs are attacking and we are cavemen. We don't take it personally, we know it's not real, we just have fun. Over time our habitual tendencies become ingrained in ourselves and in a lot of cases begin to take over forming literal neural trunk lines in our brains. We begin to get lazy as the observer or the conscious and just let our minds take over. Everyone does this.

There is nothing wrong with any of this of course, and no one could get anything done if this system wasn't set in place. The problem lies when traumatic and painful incidents occur where our life is perceived to be threatened in some way. During these moments our survival mechanisms kick in, our fight or flight response takes over and the observer is sort of kicked out of the picture. We are no longer being human, we are responding as if an animal would when you put a hot poker to them. Ever have a bad case of food poisoning and then never want to eat that food again? You might even still think of the food as tasting good, but the thought of eating it just makes you ill. The emotional impact of the event is such that you can no longer be responsible, the mind shuts you out and takes over. It has recorded anything unique to the event and if you put yourself in a situation with similar circumstances it is going to hit you with some pain to make sure you get out of there. Like I said everything in your mind is there because it's considered useful.

The truly devastating thing though is when we are told that we CANNOT CHANGE. That we ARE those habitual patterns in our mind. It's like being handed the keys to a ferrari with no brakes and we are cruising around at 180 mph all the time. Eventually we give up trying to stop and forget there was ever anything else besides driving this dumb car around, and we lose ourselves and believe WE ARE the ferrari! What else is there to life after all? It's funny if you think about it. It's clear with things such as NLP that this is simply not true, any of our habitual patterns in our minds can be replaced with new more effective ones. When we are told we cannot change, when we are told we cannot be responsible for ourselves, our humanity is ripped away from us. All of us instinctively fight against this, and I think that is why psychology is still looked down upon and it's a sort of stigma if you admit to having needed therapy.

Well, I could go write a book about all this if I wanted to (maybe I should). My plans for now are to get my degree and then start practicing my own form of therapy. I plan to use marijuana extensively, having smoked it myself I found it to be extremely therapeutic and beneficial when combined with the right guidance. It allowed me to separate from my mind, to see the habitual and subconscious thoughts swirling around in my head and to regain control of them and replace them with new ones. It allowed me to get back to myself which is the only place true healing can begin. Zoloft did similar things, and maybe in some extreme cases harder drugs like that could be used, but I feel like I never needed it in the first place. It did basically the same thing marijuana did, just with way worse side effects and a ridiculous withdrawal.

I hope some day I can make a huge change in peoples lives across the planet. This is something that applicable to all of us, not just the ones that are so obviously crippled that they have to be put on medication. All of us are a little crazy, anything that you couldn't change your mind on easily and quickly you are somewhat crazy on. Think about that for a second and the far reaching effects it would have on society if everyone was fully conscious, aware, and free minded. Governments would not be necessary, you couldn't control people through mental manipulation and advertising, the poker economy would die lol. I think poker is proof that people just do not have control of their minds, so many times just "shutting off" and going on auto pilot and not understanding why. It really does anger me how many people have suffered needlessly with minds that were out of control and debilitating.

Worse than that is how people with mental conditions are looked down upon by those who don't. I say "don't" loosely, they just appear more sane by societies standards. All of us have the capability to become a serial killer, a murderer, a rapist. Whatever evil humanity is capable of we all have within ourselves but most people don't want to admit that. They read about someone like the godmother of cocaine Griselda Blanco who was responsible for the murders of 100's of people and look down in disgust and contempt.

I prefer to take pity at just how far people can fall from their humanity, understanding that if I was raised in their situations I might very well have become the same. For Griselda Blanco, death and murder and violence were just an ordinary part of her childhood, she had committed her first murder at the age of 11. That could be you if you were in her shoes. There are so many poor lost souls out there and we just torture them even further or lock them away so we don't have to think about them because we don't understand them. They highlight our own worst fears and things we don't want to look at in ourselves.

Well, if I can effect any change in my life in regards to all of this I will die a happy man. Of course there are many people in positions of power who are hopelessly lost and have a vested interest in keeping everyone at the state of chemically addicted animal. They are so afraid of not being in control their worst fear is a society of sane free-willed individuals. I'm sure I'll be flying right into the teeth of them. Hope I don't end up dead. If I do at least I'll be a martyr and hopefully it will make people take notice, we all have to die at some point after all.

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AgentIce   . Dec 31 2010 10:50. Posts 28

I guess I'm not the first to realize marijuana is useful for treating mental disorders: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,117541,00.html


aznricebeast   . Dec 31 2010 14:24. Posts 73

you have add its obvious to me because you are distracted with all this BS when you should be on the grind

Dieting is Easy When your FullLast edit: 31/12/2010 14:25

Carthac   United States. Dec 31 2010 16:03. Posts 1343

You have the idea of medication all jumbled. How prescription antidepressants, bendodiazapines, etc. work is they simply send a signal to the brain to produce more or less of a chemical already in your brain. For example, if a psychologist finds you have a certain disorder that is marked by a lack of seratonin, they will prescribe a seratonin specific reuptake inhibitor to increase the levels of seratonin in an attempt to help with your disorder.

HOWEVER, perception is very powerful, and is a completely different section of psychology that is equal to neurotransmitters. You can develop a disorder from a terrible occurrence in your life, long recurring emotional trauma, etc. Even more interesting is the fact that 2 people can experience the exact same event, and one can not be affected at all and one could develop a disorder that is so troubling, it may cause the person to develop suicidal thoughts (maybe even act on them).

Our brains are so complex, it will at least be a very long time before we are able to get a full grasp on what is going on, if we ever do that is.

P.S. If you are really into the study of the brain and THC, maybe consider doing research on cannabanoid receptors of the brain. We have no idea why they are there, what they are used for, but they have been there for a very long time. Maybe your big addition to the world can be an explanation and a new fact for the scientific community

 Last edit: 31/12/2010 16:12

Steal City   United States. Dec 31 2010 17:11. Posts 2537

also your views on the labeling theory and prison are not unique
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labeling_theory

but also there are practical issues to contend with. People are put in jail for the most part to separate them from society which is more important than to rehabilitate them given rehabilitation is not possible often at least with our current understandings. You need to look at the advantages and practicality of labelling too.

Also, in the beginning you say people should be considered responsible for their actions if I read it right. Then you say that people are mere products of their genes and environment and formulas like complex machinery that given x will produce a mathematically based result. I agree but you fail to recognize that society is right to shun them. Just like our bodies expel diseased germs from the body, so too much a functioning healthy society expel these people or confine these people until that society develops a way to actually rehabilitate them. Sounds harsh but you know how you should only perform CPR on someone to a specific point, after which you should stop lest you hurt yourself. Accepting people who are not mentally healthy into you life can ruin your own life and change your mentality to a damaging degree. I have not had contact that i know of with people who are damaged to the degree that they need hospitalization but I know that even milder people with serious mental health issues can spread their handicap like a contagious disease. Put a manipulative person with borderline into a healthy functioning family and watch in horror as the sanity of all are tested and perhaps broken.

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AgentIce   . Dec 31 2010 18:42. Posts 28


  On December 31 2010 15:03 Carthac wrote:
You have the idea of medication all jumbled. How prescription antidepressants, bendodiazapines, etc. work is they simply send a signal to the brain to produce more or less of a chemical already in your brain. For example, if a psychologist finds you have a certain disorder that is marked by a lack of seratonin, they will prescribe a seratonin specific reuptake inhibitor to increase the levels of seratonin in an attempt to help with your disorder.



I understand this is how said medications work, what I was trying to say is that they don't answer the reason why their is a said lack of chemical in the brain. My theory is that it is the soul/conscious/spirit whatever is what has a direct control over what chemicals are specifically released into the brain. Our beliefs about who we are have a direct effect on our minds, on a physical level. For example, I can focus on myself, my knowingness, my soul, and my entire body will start to tingle quite strongly. Also, I've always been able to give myself a headache at will depending on how I focus my attention. I'm sure you have heard similar stories of buddhist monks being able to perform other feats. There is a long list of strange occurences people experience when meditating or getting in touch with themselves, out of body experiences, illnesses disappearing, etc.


  On December 31 2010 15:03 Carthac wrote:
HOWEVER, perception is very powerful, and is a completely different section of psychology that is equal to neurotransmitters. You can develop a disorder from a terrible occurrence in your life, long recurring emotional trauma, etc. Even more interesting is the fact that 2 people can experience the exact same event, and one can not be affected at all and one could develop a disorder that is so troubling, it may cause the person to develop suicidal thoughts (maybe even act on them).


This is exactly what I'm getting at, I believe it is our belief that we take away from an event that determines its effect on our bodies and mind. The only thing is as children we are completely vulnerable to whatever environmental, genetic, or social factors which might affect us and especially cause us to change our belief in ourselves. Say a baby gets sick at a young age, has to deal with bullying, there could be a long list of reasons. The way our society is setup it only serves to worsen such conditions as these kids are quickly labeled learning disabled, anti-social, or whatever else and then put on drugs which take responsibility away from the person/soul. Again, these labels only have an effect when the person themselves agrees with them and believes them. I think you can get into a "negative belief loop" where one negative belief feeds upon others until you get into a situation where you are literally trapped by the effect you are creating on your body below your level of awareness. Yes people are responsible for themselves, but we are also human, and sometimes we need help.


AgentIce   . Dec 31 2010 18:57. Posts 28


  On December 31 2010 16:11 Steal City wrote:
also your views on the labeling theory and prison are not unique
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labeling_theory

but also there are practical issues to contend with. People are put in jail for the most part to separate them from society which is more important than to rehabilitate them given rehabilitation is not possible often at least with our current understandings. You need to look at the advantages and practicality of labelling too.

Also, in the beginning you say people should be considered responsible for their actions if I read it right. Then you say that people are mere products of their genes and environment and formulas like complex machinery that given x will produce a mathematically based result. I agree but you fail to recognize that society is right to shun them. Just like our bodies expel diseased germs from the body, so too much a functioning healthy society expel these people or confine these people until that society develops a way to actually rehabilitate them. Sounds harsh but you know how you should only perform CPR on someone to a specific point, after which you should stop lest you hurt yourself. Accepting people who are not mentally healthy into you life can ruin your own life and change your mentality to a damaging degree. I have not had contact that i know of with people who are damaged to the degree that they need hospitalization but I know that even milder people with serious mental health issues can spread their handicap like a contagious disease. Put a manipulative person with borderline into a healthy functioning family and watch in horror as the sanity of all are tested and perhaps broken.



I agree with everything you said. Obviously it's better to take someone who cannot be responsible for themselves and get them away to a point where they can't hurt those around them. Just like in the civil war when amputation was the only effective treatment for many types of wounds, removing the problem is better than doing nothing. That doesn't make it civilized and it doesn't mean it's a good thing though, just our only option. In fact how we treat prisoners is quite barbaric, and the prison system is known to just create more criminals so it's like a disease which keeps on growing.

As far as people being mere products of their genes and environments, like I said above I think this is most important at a young age, before we have developed our sense of self and our awareness of ourselves as unique individuals and we are completely vulnerable to our parents and siblings for determining our identity. During this important period it is quite possible for someone to get unlucky and be given a set of beliefs and patterns that are negative and destructive and entirely beneath their awareness. I'm not trying to say that we should let violent criminals or sex offenders be free, just that it's very possible that situations out of their control made them far more likely to become who they are, and that if you were put in the same situation you might end up just like them. How would you like it if society shunned you and didn't want to have anything to do with you? Deep down you know you want to be a good person, but for whatever reason you can't control your anger, you can't communicate, you can't fit in. People take for granted so many things which many people had to die for over countless centuries while there are still people today who were never afforded such priveledges. Things such as being able to read and write, knowing how to take care of yourself, knowing how to treat others and get along and communicate without violence. Many prisoners simply never had the opportunity for such things, unable to read or write and addicted to drugs from a young age. They are put in a situation where any normal human being would probably end up the same. I can honestly say that if I had not been lucky in some very important ways I would be a completely different person today. People want to believe they got to where they are based on their own skill and perseverance, hard work, etc. They don't want to look at the fact that so many factors completely out of their control had a direct influence on where they are.

"A nation's greatness is measured by how it treats its weakest members." ~ Mahatma Ghandi



 



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