source: www.cardplayer.com
As you long time readers know, I used to do a "flashback" section on my old blog (www.alectorelli.com). The site is currenlty getting remade and should be done soon. However, the "flashback" section depicted events that I recall from the past that make for a good story and interesting read. I am planning on implementing this feature to my new blog as I have many good stories that I reminisce about on a regular basis. This one is a classic. It relives the story of Isaac "WestmenloAA" Baron and how he ended up with his Maserati.
I remember the conversation vividly. It was June of 2007 and everyone in the online poker community was super robusto (opposite of busto). I had just beaten PerkyShmerky out of $150,000 in one sitting and Isaac had 40% of my action (for those of you without a calculator that's $60,000). So by now I know you're wondering, what does "that time" mean? Well I'll get to that in due time.
"So what are we going to do?", I asked Isaac on the phone following up our session.
"Well, I'm going to buy a car. I'm thinking a Lexus or BMW."
"Good idea" I said. "I told myself while I was at the final table of FTOPS that if I won, I would buy myself a new BMW when I got home. As each player got eliminated, I started googling potential cars while playing. I think I'm going to head over to the dealership. I'll keep you posted." (Click)
You see, "that time" was referring to the time to buy a new car, and I'm a man of my word!
As those of you who read my blogs know, the rest is history and this is the end of the PerkyShmerky story. I might have left this detail out (as I don't remember), but I went over to the dealership a few hours after winning this match online and left two hours later with a brand new 2007 M6 convertible. The irony of the story was that I actually went to the Audi dealership first to test drive the R8; however, the salesmen was a moron and made some condescending remark about how it was only for "serious buyers". I believe that's the phrase he used.
"Oh that's understandable," I told him. "I'm just looking anyway."
Two hours later, I drove past him with the top down of my new car and waved. Priceless!
I came home and immediately called Isaac and filled him in.
"That's sick. I think I'm going to do the same thing myself. I'll let you know if I wind up with anything.", Isaac said.
A few hours later, I received a phone call.
"So, what happened?", I said.
"I got a 2007 Lexus IS 350 Sport."
"Sick man congrats!"
So by now you must be thinking to yourself, where does the Maserati tie in? I thought he just bought a brand new Lexus. Did I miss something.
No. You are right. This is precisely why he is the topic of my blog and this is where it gets good 
September, 2007 - Isla Vista, Santa Barbara, California
For those of you who haven't experienced Isla Vista (IV as it's called among locals), you are missing out! Well I'll elaborate slightly. For those of you who like an influx of inebriated college students, non stop partying, stupid fights, and particularly permiscuous women (although I'm not sure about the factual basis to this statement; they say 1/4 have an STD by the time they graduate UCSB), you are missing out! On Halloween it is known to be one of the best places to go in the U.S. to party. It's absolute mayhem!
It was a typical Saturday night on IV. Frat house, party, alcohol, girls. Isaac headed in for what he thought was another night out on the town. By 3 a.m Isaac was incompascitated. I realize that might not be a word, but it's how I refer to drunk people. Maybe if I use it enough it will become one. Him and Richie Guzzo (the epitome of a frat guy….remember Pocketfives several years ago "Richie on the Rail?"….same person) ended up finding another ride home. The following morning Isaac realized he didn't have his car and scrambeled around to find his keys. After what seemed like forever, he found them and began to retrace the events of the previous evening.
"Where the fuck did I park?"
"I don't know. I met you at the house."
Richie and Isaac proceeded to head back to the frat house and look for the car. Unable to find it in the nearby vicinity, they began to ask everyone there last night if they had seen it around. After several hours of looking to no avail, Isaac began to lose hope and conclude that it could have been stolen. I remember getting the phone call the next day and trying to piece together what happened.
"I just don't remember anything after midnight." Isaac said.
"Did you call the towing company or report it stolen? Maybe you parked illegally and it got towed."
"Yea, they have to report it to the company within 24 hours, so I'll check back tomorrow."
"How the fuck do you lose a brand new $50,000 car?"
"I have no clue!"
When Monday morning arrived, and still no sign of the car (he visited every towing company in the Santa Barbara area), Isaac called his insurance company to report it stolen. They took the necessary precautions and after the allotted time to confirm it's loss (maybe a month or so) mailed a check to Isaac for the full amount of the car ($50,000).
"Ya know it's just a mystery to me. I looked everywhere, and talked to everyone I know, and nobody's seen it. I guess somebody must have stolen it."
That was the final consensus. Thank God for insurance. Several months later (after receiving his check), Isaac decided it was time for a new car. Since he was doing really well in online poker, he went for an upgrade. The brand new 2007 Maserati Quattroporte. An absolutely gorgeous car, and with $50,000 already paid, he only owed another $75,000 or so. What a bargain! Now if that's not ridiculous, I'm not sure what is, except for the converation I had with Richie Guzzo about a year later.
February, 2008
I was visiting my girlfriend at the time in Santa Barbara. Richie Guzzo happen to be attending SB city college at the time and had himself a girlfriend of his own. We decided to meet up for dinner one night when the following conversation ensued. Somehow we got on the topic of Isaac Baron (as he was one of our best mutual friends) and naturally we reminisced over the story of his stolen car.
"What ever happened to that thing? Did the police ever find it or catch the guy who stole it?"
"Oh it's better than that." Richie exclaimed.
"Oh please do tell!"
"About a month ago, Isaac received a call from his insurance company informing him that they found his car."
"That's awesome! Where? And what happened to the guy who stole it?"
"That's the thing. It wasn't stolen."
"I don't follow."
"Well about a year passed when someone had noticed a car that had been collecting dust for quite some time and hadn't been moved from the same spot in over a year. They called the police who noticed the car had been reported stolen. They informed the insurance company and sure enough, it was a match!"
"So wait, let me get this straight. You're telling me Isaac left his car somewhere for over a year untouched?"
"That's exactly what I'm telling you. The retard got so drunk he forgot where he left it. They said they found it 3 blocks away from where the frat party was held, parked comfortably under a tree."
I couldn't help but laugh in hysteria. It could only happen to a poker player. It seemed so fitting it would happen to Isaac.
"So what happened to the car."
"Well since the insurance company already gave him the check, they just kept the car in return. What was particularly funny though, was they took the liberty of mailing him all his school work from the previous year that he left in the car."
If this isn't the most ridiculous thing you have ever heard please share your comparable story at alectorelli@gmail.com.
Cheers
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