Hepp, since a lot of people on lp are really emotional, fluffy and loving. I thought it might be a good idea to snap up some shit on emotions. I'll start with the negative ones. What triggers them, what the message is and what a solution might be.
(It is a little old knowledge, so today we know A LOT MORE. These are taken from The 7 Habits and Awakening books).
The 10 Negative Emotions
1. DISCOMFORT.
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Doesn't have a tremendous amount of intensity, but they do bother us and creates a nagging sensation.
The Message:
Boredom, impatience, unease, distress, or mild embarrassment are all sending you a message that something is not quite right. Maybe the way you're perceiving things is off, or the actions you're taking are not producing the results you want.
Solution:
1) Change state
2) Clarify what you do want; and
3) Refine your actions. Try a slightly different approach and see if you can't immediately change the way you're feeling about the situation and/or change the quality of results you're producing.
2. FEAR.
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Includes everything from low levels of concern and apprehension to intense worry, anxiety, fright, and even terror.
The Message:
Fear is the anticipation that something that's going to happen soon needs to be prepared for.
The Solution:
Review what you were feeling fearful about and evaluate what you must do to prepare yourself mentally. Figure out what actions you need to take to deal with the situation in the best possible way.
3. HURT.
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Seems to dominate human relationships. Feelings of hurt are usually generated by a sense of loss.
The Message:
We have an expectation that has not been met.
Solutions:
1) Realize that in reality you may not have lost anything. Maybe what you need to lose is the false perception that this person has done or is trying to do.
2) Reevaluate the situation. Ask yourself, "is there really loss here?"
3) Elegantly and appropriately communicate your feeling of loss to the person involved.
4. ANGER.
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Angry emotions include everything from being mildly irritated to being angry, resentful, furious, or even enraged.
The Message:
An important rule or standard that you hold for your life has been violated by someone else, or maybe even by you.
Solution:
1) Realize that you may have misinterpreted the situation completely, that your anger about this person breaking the rules may be based on the fact that they don't know what's most important to you. (Even though you believe they should).
2) Even if a person did violate one of your standards, your rules are not necessarily the "right" rules, even though you feel as strongly as you do about them.
3) Ask yourself more empowering questions. Interrupt the anger, what can I learn from this? How to avoid it in the future?
5. FRUSTRATION.
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Feeling surrounded by roadblocks, continuously putting out effort but not receiving rewards.
The Message:
This is an exciting signal. It means that your brain believes you could be doing better than you currently are. (Oh man, I feel frustrated most of the time yay).
Solution:
1) Realize frustration is your friend (wat...), and brainstorm new ways to get a result. How can you flex your approach?
2) Get some input on how to deal with the situation. Find a role model, someone who has found a way to get what you want.
3) Get fascinated by what you can learn that could help you handle this challenge, not only today, but in the future, in a way that consumes very little time or energy and actually creates joy. (I'm so now lol).
6. DISAPPOINTMENT.
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A very destructive emotion if not dealt with quickly. Devastating feeling of being "let down" or that you're going to miss out on something forever. Anything that makes you feel sad or defeated as a result of expecting more than you get is disappointing. (mm).
The Message:
An expectation you have had-a goal you were really going for is probably not going to happen, so it's time to change your expectations to make them more appropriate for this situation and take action to set and achieve a new goal immediately.
Solution:
1) Immediately figure out something you can learn from this situation that could help you in the future to achieve the very thing you were after in the first place.
2) Set a new goal, something that will be even more inspiring, and something you can make immediate progress toward.
3) Realize that you may be judging too soon. Often the things you're disappointed about are only temporary challenges.
4) Realize the situation isn't over yet, develop more patience. Completely reevaluate what you truly want, and begin to develop an effective plan for achieving it.
5) Cultivating an attitude of positive expectancy about what will happen in the future, regardless of what has occurred in the past.
7. GUILT.
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Emotions of guilt, regret, and remorse are among the emotions human beings do most to avoid in life, and this is valuable. They are painful emotions for us to experience, but they to serve a valuable function.
The Message:
Guilt tells you that you have violated one of your own highest standards, and that you must do something immediately to ensure that you're not going to violate that standard again in the future. (Denying or suppressing it doesn't work, it'll fuck you over in the long term, and it'll only come back stronger I think).
Solution:
1) Acknowledge that you have, in fact, violated a critical standard you hold for yourself.
2) Absolutely commit yourself to making sure this behavior will never happen again in the future. Rehearse in your mind how, if you could live it again, you could deal with the same situation you feel guilty about in a way that is consistent with your own highest personal standards.
8.INADEQUACY. (longple will probably just scroll past this one).
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Feeling of unworthiness, occurs anytime we feel we can't do something we should be able to do. The challenge, of course, is that often we have a completely unfair rule for determining whether we're inadequate or not.
The Message:
You don't presently have a level of skill necessary for the task at hand. It's telling you that you need more information, understanding, strategies, tools or confidence.
Solution:
1) Ask yourself, "Is this really an appropriate emotion for me to feel in this situation? Am I really inadequate, or do I have to change the way I'm perceiving things?" (Thought of an example, like, a lot of noobs think they can not game hardcore, and then just do a few placement matches and hit Masters like I can).
2) If your feeling is justified, the message of inadequacy is that you need to find a way to do something better than you've done it before.
3) Whenever you feel inadequate, appreciate the encouragement to improve.
Dedicate yourself to constant and never-ending improvement.
4) Find a role model, someone who's effective in the area in which you feel like a noob, and get some coaching from them. (Go from inadequate to learning).
9. OVERWHELMED.
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Grief, depression, helplessness are merely expressions of feeling overwhelmed. (For some reason I'm thinking about an Archon right now). Feeling of that nothing can change the situation, that the problem is too big, it's permanent, pervasive, and personal. People go into these states whenever they perceive their world in a way that makes them fel like there's more going on than they can possibly deal with.
The Message:
You need to reevaluate what's most important to you in this situation. (Being overwhelmed disrupts and destroys more people's lives that just about any other emotion).
The Solution:
1) Decide, out of all the things you're dealing with in your life, what the absolute, most important thing is for you to focus on.
2) Now write down all the things that are most important for you to accomplish and put them in an order of priority. Just putting them down on a paper will allow you to begin to feel a sense of control over what's going on.
3) Tackle the first thing on your list, and continue to take action until you've mastered it.
4) When you feel that it's appropriate to start letting go of an overwhelming emotion like grief, start focusing on what you can control and realize that there must be some empowering meaning to it all, even though you can't comprehend it yet.
When we create an environment inside our minds that has too many intense and simultaneous demands upon us, of course we'll feel overloaded. But we also have the power to change this by focusing on what we can control and dealing with it a step at a time.
(Sure was a lot of text on this one).
10. LONELINESS.
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Anything that makes us feel alone, apart, or separate from others belongs in this category.
The Message:
The message of loneliness is that you need a connection with people. (lol)
The Solution:
1) Realize that you can reach out and make a connection and end it. There are caring people everywhere, except maybe up in Norway.
2) Identify what kind of connection you do need. Intimate? Friendship? Someone to listen and talk with?
3) Remind yourself that what's great about being lonely is that it means, "I really care about people, and I love to be with them. I need to find out what kind of connection I need with somebody right now, and then take an action to make that happen". (Seems a bit Sesame street to me, but I'll let it slide).
4) Then take immediate action to reach out and connect with someone.
End Thoughts; "We must cultivate our garden". - VOLTAIRE
(And if any of you don't know what cultivate means, don't worry, we can get Loco to tell us later on in one of the replies xD).
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