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RiKD    United States. Nov 05 2019 04:53. Posts 8445
So, I think I said my piece on "Culture." The evil billionaires are behind it all. And most of society eats it up (sometimes literally in the case of factory farming).

It makes me want to take some ecstasy with a bunch of people and dance to songs like this:



Or since I don't do ecstasy anymore I can educate myself. That's no small feat. It's easy to get lost in stuff. It's just easy to get lost in stuff in general.

Like work. I'd be lying if I said thoughts/worries of work tomorrow morning didn't encroach on my psyche. I know I can only face tomorrow with the reason I have in the present but that doesn't always keep the anxieties from blipping through. The anxieties help me do my job to a certain extent. It is what it is. It is a fact of my life. I need to make money to try and somehow keep up with medical bills and car expenses not to mention eating.

I guess this blog is just sort of same ole' same ole'. I went back and read through some old blogs because I was trying to find those hiking boots I coveted so much. Loco was right. I do use this blog as a surrogate but the thing is I use it because I have nothing else going on. If I were doing Tai Chi or out to dinner with friends I wouldn't be blogging. Although I tend to blog upon waking or before going to sleep. Get my thoughts out uninterrupted by the day. Although I don't think many people are all that interested in paragraphs of random thought. My therapist probably isn't either but she gets to be there and help me out and eat food and decide what clothes to wear.

I use this website as a replacement for real friendships. Not to say that there isn't a place for online friendships. There is just a difference to someone in my car talking to me, maybe even complaining about something and we can level and maybe even get some laughs out of it. There is a lot of stuff I want to talk about that I can't talk about with my mom.

DJ Tiesto - Adagio for Strings just came up in the playlist I am listening to. Holy shit I was like the perfect amount of high at the peak of that song LIVE in concert. That was like a 20 speed y vodka, 20 jote peak. Although the fact that I had 20 joints doesn't really matter I could have just had 1 at the right time. That concert went to like 6am. Actually, it was still going when we left at 6am. Sick life. We were staying at this hostel and I never even saw any of my roommates due to the fact that my hours were like 4pm - 8am.

I don't really know what I should do with what Nature has given me. It's not real clear at this point. And it's tough to live life in that position.

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RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 05:19. Posts 8445

Pondering, pondering, pondering....

Today wasn't a bad day at work. Setup wasn't too bad. It was good steady when it needed to be steady and a bit slower when it was time to start closing down shop. I can't complain.

I was thinking about it that going to see a therapist is kind of strange. The hospital bills me absurd amounts and I just go in there and it's similar to my blog except she asks me questions and helps guide me. None of you are therapists though so it's weird to post these journals on LP. I have nothing to do though.... It's like I keep thinking this counts for contemplative lingering and it may or it may not. I don't even know what I'm contemplating....


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 05:53. Posts 8445

For the record I don't think that billionaires are inherently evil. It's more complicated than that. I do think that it's hard to become a billionaire without being a part of some profoundly immoral or wicked dealings. I don't know how Bill Gates treated labor but he could be an example of someone that is doing good in the world. If Kanye West is actually a billionaire he just sold music and overpriced clothing to people. He has factories in China though so that's pretty iffy. If he actually gets the factories in the USA and takes care of labor and gets price points down we may have another "good" billionaire in our midsts. I'm open to hear about more "success" stories.

The problem is every worker is FREE (to starve). The plantation owners are still the plantation owners. That is immoral.

Kanye is starting to farm food and also materials for clothing himself. He is working on James Turrell inspired architecture for housing of homeless people and said ultimately he would like to donate his clothing. I guess I will believe it when I see it. He is currently charging more absurd prices for his merch and yeezy brand than the hospital is charging for psychotherapy. These days I just wear Gildan and don't give a fuck. It's liberating.


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 06:07. Posts 8445

Isn't it fucked up that 2 of the most widely farmed products are high fructose corn syrup and cow and that the government subsidizes these enterprises?


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 06:10. Posts 8445

Do I want to look up everything the government subsidizes or do I want to not vomit all over my keyboard?


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 06:12. Posts 8445

Beef, high fructose corn syrup and weapons. USA USA USA!!!


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 06:13. Posts 8445

LET'S DRIVE LARGE CARS AND USE A BUNCH OF OIL!!! USA USA USA!!!


RiKD    United States. Nov 07 2019 17:05. Posts 8445

State and corporations. Linked they are a formidable force. This is the world we live in.

Oligarchies ABOUND. Tyrants, despots, CORRUPTION. What is a cracker like me supposed to do?

Watch the birds, feel the breeze, SWIPE RIGHT....

Embrace me, surround me, as the rush comes,

as the rush comes,

as the rush comes,

as the rush comes,

What is freedom today?

Is it 4 redbull vodkas, a couple of ecstasy pills and a rave?

Is it sitting at my computer at 10am in the morning with some coffee and some music typing shit up on an internet blog????>>>....

Damn, my uncle makes some STRONG coffee. He's all mild mannered drinking like 10 cups of super strong coffee. Crazyness.


How are we going to solve all of the world's problems?

Bill Gates and Warren Buffet are trying to do it with nuclear but Trump killed the deal with China. There is enough waste in Kentucky to power the earth for 200 years and people are like NYOOOOOOOPPPPPPEEEEE. Fucking bundles of sticks. Maybe I don't dislike Bill Gates as much as I thought I did. He was just a computer nerd. I am glad the world has computers. How did he treat the wage slaves though? Did they go offshore to places where they had to install suicide nets? Mr. Gates is trying to get toilets into Africa. How can someone be against inoculating children from disease?

Warren Buffet I really don't know. Finance guys are dicey. They are great at swindling us simpletons.

Revolution. small r revolution. our revolution.

small incremental change over a period of time.

Can we overcome the powers that be?

I feel like painting but that is not possible at the moment. *FROWN FACE*

I am a field nigger. But really I'm a house cracker. I don't feel the whip I exploit my damn self. Damn self. They always pay you just enough not to go too much in debt. Unless you have a drug problem or a gambling problem or a really bad shopping problem.

They don't want you too liquid. Liquidity = Freedom. 6 months living expenses = some semblance of freedom. Doing something that you can say or do whatever you want and it doesn't effect the "Brand." Not exploiting wage slaves = Freedom. I gotta go for it. It seems like artist is the only occupation that fits in here. I gotta think more radical. Chomsky is pretty free. Kanye West is free. Who knows what I may face when I leave this recording booth?

I am entangled. I am enmeshed. I just wanted to be liberated. I just want to be liberated. I just want to be liberated.

Is Bernie Sanders the answer? I don't know. He certainly has to be better than Trump. Capitalism: is there no alternative?

I label myself an anti-capitalist. I think most people don't comprehend what that means. They can't see outside of the box. That's what Mark Fisher's capitalist realism is all about. I think most people can't even comprehend anything other than capitalism.

How could anyone argue that the Koch brothers aren't evil? They are despicable. Dick Cheney? John D. Rockefeller? Makes me sick.

LOBBYISTS.

Dairy. How is it possible that the dairy people can fund research that makes dairy look a certain way. The cows aren't happy!!! There is a BBQ place with a ecstatic pig as the mascot. Fucking really?!?!? Same with the fried chicken places.

Is there anyone with me in all of this stuff or are we just status quo mannequins? Letting the fuckers dress us however they want. Wear this, eat this, do this. OBEY. Fuck that man. Let's go against the grain. Are we free to live authentic lives? Sartre says so.


RiKD    United States. Nov 09 2019 20:03. Posts 8445

I am stuck watching NCAA Football. The Ohio State Buckeyes ranked number one in the nation (8-0) are playing the University of Maryland Terrapins (3-6). So far it has been a one sided affair. I think the Buckeyes are favored by 20 or so points. I've already seen Cadillac SUV commercials with cool kids looking like ANTIFA all getting into a Cadillac to do there thing. We don't want your Cadillacs or your neoliberal life! Well.... most viewers probably do.


 



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