Big 5 Personality Score - Page 4

Being more agreeable = being more of a pushover. It really isn't quite as great as most people think it is.

On June 13 2017 04:29 Loco wrote: Being more agreeable = being more of a pushover. It really isn't quite as great as most people think it is.

Of the people I know that have scored high in agreeableness its an actual issue and they want to be less agreeable, and I dont know anyone that scores low that wants to be more agreeable

I seriously don't understand how everyone scores so low on neuroticism heh
One of my problems with this test is that I'd probably not give the same answers twice in a row.
The opinion one has for himself is prob not truthful or solid enough not to change a few hours later (eg after eating a meal)
Or I'm just too neurotic -_-

On June 13 2017 05:10 Baalim wrote: Show nested quote + On June 13 2017 04:29 Loco wrote: Being more agreeable = being more of a pushover. It really isn't quite as great as most people think it is. Of the people I know that have scored high in agreeableness its an actual issue and they want to be less agreeable, and I dont know anyone that scores low that wants to be more agreeable

I don't either, people I know want to stick to what they know is best for them and not be influenced by the status quo, marketers, etc... but I mean, those who say they want to be more agreeable probably think that due to a misunderstanding of the trait (they think it's inherently positive and makes life better). They don't realize its dangers. In reality, it just makes it harder to be a healthy, self-disciplined individual.

On June 13 2017 12:16 lebowski wrote: I seriously don't understand how everyone scores so low on neuroticism heh One of my problems with this test is that I'd probably not give the same answers twice in a row. The opinion one has for himself is prob not truthful or solid enough not to change a few hours later (eg after eating a meal) Or I'm just too neurotic -_-

I think I would rank much higher if I wasn't living my life how I want it now. The fact that it's that low is just because I structured my life in a way that makes it hard for me to have mood swings. I probably would never rank mid-high to high but if I had to play poker for a living for instance it would be completely different, I would be frustrated frequently and it would bleed into other aspects of my life as it used to.

I dunno about the others but I did the test a few times and my neuroticism stayed low and I'm being as objective as I can. A good indicator that I'm objective (I think) is that for instance, despite living with my girlfriend and being together pretty much all day every day, in the last 5 years I haven't yelled or gotten really angry at her once, except one time where, funnily enough, I actually forced myself to do so to calm her down. My girlfriend was actually annoyed that I never got visibly upset about anything and she started to use it against me. (She'd made passive-aggressive remarks about how I'm detached from things and how I must have been feeling superior to her who gets upset frequently). So one day where she was having one of her awful days, she angrily (but accidentally) did something that seemed like it could have physically hurt me, but I was fine. I used it as an opportunity to show her I wasn't detached. I acted as if she had physically hurt me and powerfully/angrily pushed away the thing she had shoved into me and yelled at her. I didn't feel angry and I knew I was acting convincingly but she got scared and calmed down immediately and never did this again. Usually it would take her a while to calm herself down on her own. I wasn't conscious of it at the time but I remembered it was something that I think Epictetus recommended you do in this kind of scenario where someone abuses your tranquil nature and I had never had the opportunity to try it before that. The next day my girlfriend basically said she had never known I had this kind of anger inside of me and she didn't want to trigger it by acting carelessly now.

Even if that sounds manipulative I think its important to even act it as you did, I think in relationships when someone is considerably more moody than the other they feel like their partner is detached and will probe over and over to get a reaction, perhaps is not really that they feel you are detached but they feel inadequate unless you show "flaws" in that regard like they do.

It seems to be manipulative, but I think it's the opposite: the person who is being passive-aggressive is the one trying to manipulate you. They want to bring you down to their level, for lack of a better explanation. Their self-esteem has been hurt because you seem to be "above it all" and they aren't. My reaction was not calculated and it wasn't like common manipulation which is selfish, I just felt annoyed at the time and simply exaggerated my feelings to defuse the situation so that both of us would benefit from it.